Help Diana Overcome OCD and Severe Depression

Hi Everyone my name is Diana Batista and I'm here this time to ask for help to myself, 3 years ago after my second baby born I start feel sick( really depressed, muscle weakness, no energy, feel my heart beat fast, my hair falling) so after 9 months being like that doctors tell me I had graves disease, I did a treatment with medication but I had an allergy reaction to Methimazole so they decided to RAI and because doesn't work so well I became hypothyroidism instead hyperthyroidism, I stay one year with so many symptoms and try find the right dose of medication. I decided try natural medication for another year but still feeling really bad. So I stop natural and talk with my PCP and she recommended back on thyroid meds. In December 2024 start feel worse and worse, having panic attacks, no energy, my mind is completely out with all the unwanted intrusive thoughts and I start feeling I don't wanna leave anymore with that pain, stay in bed for 17 hours without eating and no energy to get up. After talk with my doctor she recommended go to the ER right away and say the way I feel, they admitted me at mental health department and I stay there for 9 days and with diagnosed of severe depressive disorder, back home for 5 days and need back again because the thoughts are so bad that I can't have 1 hour without thoughts. The second time at mental health department I stay 14 days and I open to talk about the intrusive thoughts and they diagnosed OCD. I've being on medication and talk therapy since that but this OCD sometimes make us so disability that make not get up of the bed, I do because I have 2 little boys to take care. Doctors recommended a really good OCD therapist, I had my first appointment yesterday May 26th but the cost of this therapy is really expensive, they tell me the first 2 or 3 session need to be an hour and then we can try reduce to half session so can be more helpful for our finances. We spend all the money with natural doctor and still have hospital bills to pay, we give one of our cars back to try reduce some expenses and try find more solutions. I'm self employed, house cleaning and unfortunately I just can help when I have some good days. My husband need stop with his job and go to the cleaning business so we try not lost our clients that some of them I have for 10 years.

Hurts me so much asking help for myself because all the time I try find resources to help others but I believe we can't afford this therapy with messing up with all our finances so if you can help with something we really appreciate that. Is being a difficult 3 years without enjoying my 2 boys and husband because of this mental problem. OCD with severe depression disorder, anxiety and thyroid issues is being so debilitating.

I love my job and I do with love and anytime I wake up good I like to go with them to help but is being a long journey. And doctors tell me This therapy is gonna be the key since medication is just one part of the process.