Wednesday night the specialist gallbladder surgeon said, "the Cardiff multi-disciplinary team reveiwed your case and concur that you have an advanced metastatic gallbladder cancer. It is very rare and inoperable. We need to do an invasive camera procedure to see how far it has spread and into how many areas. We see tumours on the peretenuem (the sack that holds ones intestines, stomach and organs in place in the lower body cavity) and once we know the type, the oncologist can then determine a course of chemotherapy treatment, since radiation will not be effective." Gulp.
Three weeks ago I was waking 5-7 miles a day. Was in the best shape of my life having lost 4 stone, and was focused on helping others achieve maximum health. Today a walk to the end of the drive and back leaves me breathless and gasping for air. All this has happened in three weeks' time and the NHS specialists are moving heaven and earth to find the right treatment regimen for me. I am also doing my part to rest and heal when tired (which is more often each day).
Many of you know, earlier this year I worked with and was taken financially (along with many other reputable professionals and firms) by a criminal fraudster for whom not a penny promised was ever paid in salary or bonuses over a 3+ month period. That was personally and financially devastating and while the recovery was just beginning... this illness has shown me how tough the road ahead is. Now, unable to work and facing a long period of chemo could mean another 3-4 months of zero income. To say I am in between a rock and a hard place would be an understatement.
And, I never, ever ask for help. It is a major character flaw to pres on no matter what. Receiving love and support and opening up is so very difficult. I instead am always first in the queue to help others, no matter my own situation in the moment. I am just not wired to accept and this disease is changing that, making me swallow my pride.
I made this video so you can see how I look today, but since I am a video editor, used a lot of energy to splice in the wonderful song 'Underdogs' by Travis Meadows and some photos of my family I struggle to help (as well as myself). The lyrics are incredibly powerful and mirror my life philosophy.
Anything you can do would be amazing. And I promise to do everything in my power to recover and pay your kindness forward to others when healed. My family thanks you from the bottom of our heart and each day as my health improves, I will do everything I can to reach out and thank each of you personally. I will update everyone on my Twitter account , Instagram Facebook, and the Facebook Page set up to provide regular updates.
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