On July 5, 2019, my dad died. Less than 24 hours later, so did my mom. Both from cancer. Different types. And the second round of cancer for both of them. Fuck cancer. I (their daughter, Renée) was 30 at the time, but I felt like a small child who had just been orphaned. Five years later, I still do.

I feel ashamed to admit that it’s taken me this long to finally get a headstone for their graves at Lewisburg Cemetery in my hometown of Lewisburg, PA. It probably sounds absurd to you and maybe you’re thinking disrespectful to my parents. Five years?! Yes. But losing both parents within 24 hours of each other after being blindsided by their separate cancer diagnoses when I went home to visit them and attend my own bridal shower just 3 months before my wedding (and 6 months after unexpectedly losing my future mother-in-law to dementia)...that shit was hard. Managing the grief after all of that? Even harder.

But the dust has settled (the grief has not). The wedding is over (the one in the hospital with my parents and the official/planned one 3 months later), my husband (Lou) and I went on our honeymoon, we cleaned out my parents’ house (during a global pandemic) that they built/loved/and lived in for over forty years, sold it, settled the estate, cared for their quirky elderly dog (Duke) before he passed, grew in our own home in Raleigh, had our first baby (Owen) in 2021, and our second (Theo) in 2023. A whole lot of life has happened. Now, I need to officially honor the incredible life of my parents and their love for each other. Plant something tangible and permanent on their final resting place so that they will never be forgotten, though I don’t think that would ever be possible. They left too much of a mark on their community to be forgotten. And I will spend the rest of my life thinking of them every single day - trying to make them proud. And their grandsons will hear stories of them so much that they’ll feel like they actually know them - at least that’s my hope. Owen already calls my dad “Pop” and my mom “DeeDee” when he sees them in photos. Pop and DeeDee would love these boys endlessly.

So now I have come here (very humbly) to ask for your help and support in creating this memorial for them where family and friends can visit and celebrate the beautiful lives they lived. Many of you likely know that death is a pricey business (in my opinion, it has absolutely no right being so pricey when it already demands so much from the family left behind). Any contribution at all will help alleviate the financial burden (because childcare takes all my money these days) and will help me create something truly special for the two greatest, strongest people I have ever known.

If you’re interested in what I have planned, I decided on a headstone like this one with two vases for flowers on the sides:

I plan to put their names (Dee and Dennis Robinson) on it, their birth and death dates, include a floral design in the corners, and add the song lyric “Until the 12th of Never” on it (taken from an old song very dear to my parents and engraved on my mom’s wedding ring). I’m also working with Keane Scholl of Creative Plantscapes to design a beautiful display of flowers around the headstone that will bloom every year. Keane designed all of the incredible landscaping around my parents’ property that they were always so so proud of and loved sitting outside together enjoying it, so I am so grateful that he agreed to take on this (undoubtedly unique and unexpected) project. It means a lot to have someone who knew my parents personally, and worked with them so closely for years, design something that honors their memory and legacy and will be able to be enjoyed by anyone who visits them forever and always. Thank you so much, Keane.

Any amount that is donated here will go directly toward the costs associated with the headstone and landscaping. Here’s a breakdown of those costs:

Headstone & installation - $6,247

Freight - $225

Concrete foundation - $705.60

Landscaping - TBD

Total - $7,177.60 + TBD landscaping cost

From the very bottom of my heart, thank you for even considering this request. I will gladly let you know once headstone installation and flower planting are complete so that you can stop by and visit and share your stories with my beloved parents. You can find them at the Lewisburg Cemetery, Section 4D, Plot FF, Spaces 15 and 16, to be exact.