Help Aiko Recover from Cancer and Finn Heal

Dear Friends! Aiko here. Long time no see. I moved to California in April 2018 with the dream of being near my mom, dad, sisters, and brother, getting out of my comfort zone, and creating a new chapter in my life. Also, to bring Finn to California and create memories during his golden years.

 

October 2021 brought some surprises and a reality check. I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and October happens to be Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

The first question that came to mind when I first heard the diagnosis message was, what did I do to cause this cancer? I realize these next few months. I will face some challenges along the way. I hope to use this diagnosis as an opportunity for acceptance and gratitude to stay open and curious along the way. I am now taking some time to rest, recover and heal from the immediate surgery on October 20th and re-excision on Nov 8th and following this enhanced recovery that will include more tests, radiation, or chemo. This journey means taking time off from my current work, which brings uncertainties about covering for health insurance, personal and medical bills while I also take care of Finn's vet costs, show up for my family and Finn. I am facing the need to take care of debt that I couldn't afford to pay in full. Not working in California during this time has posed financial sacrifices and learning lessons.

During that one walk on June 10th, 2021, a young, friendly exuberant brown Lab greeted Finn and accidentally scratched his eye, which resulted in his left eyelid suffering from the conjunctiva, deep corneal ulceration, and now suspected peri-ocular tumors. I am not sure what is causing these tumors in his eyelid, but his eyes are constantly watery now, and he appears to be suffering from a dry hacking cough that he can't shake off, and it's now almost the end of November 2021. We risk him losing his eyesight if I leave this eyelid untreated. I haven't been able to take him to the vet after exhausting my savings from vet bills in the Fall of 2018, 2019, and 2020. I have done all my best with what homeopathy can do. It's time to talk to the vet. The recommended treatment is surgery, but I have to make sure I can heal up and make it to the vet first.

 

This GoFundMe fundraiser will help me go through this cancer recovery which will allow me the space to recover and return to work at the same time, bringing dear sweet Finn back to health. If Venmo or Zelle is better for you, please feel free to choose that option.

 

Having breast cancer brought a sense of urgency to recalibrate, prioritize taking care of my body and Finn even more. I notice I have pushed away uncomfortable emotions for fear of being judged and not being accepted, preventing me from asking for help early on. I wish I could see you all and hear you. In this process, I did not realize I did not grieve my leaving Columbus, which is also why I acknowledge the pain in my heart for not allowing myself the space to feel the difficult emotions. COVID-19 has put things into perspective, and after losing my beloved Obachan in Japan in August 2021, I intend to be fully present with the discomfort and be kind.

 

I need help right now. I recognize it isn't very comfortable for me to ask for help. I expected to have a job that would allow me the freedom to not worry about finances. I made some choices that that caused some consequences. I see it.

 

Your donation helps me have surgery this month to get these cancerous cells out of my body. You can help me get through radiation therapy in December 8-30. You will help me pay for health insurance. You can help me get through the anxiety of getting my red blood cells and hematocrit levels to return to the normal range. I feel grateful I was able to get through the first cancer surgery and the second without complications. I will continue to see my doctor for a full workup to see anything else we missed.

 

My mind, heart, and actions will dictate how I will recover these next year and set the conditions right so cancer does not return. I need your help and support. I realize I haven't been active in this beloved community for far too long, and I risk not being seen or heard because of it. I hope you see this, and if you remember me, I would love to hear from you. Columbus and New York have been a beacon of light of love and kindness. San Francisco and Los Angeles have been patiently waiting for me to get into the world. I am noticing the sadness, regret, and sorrow for being absent from Columbus because I was too focused on being in California that I lost my true community and sense of belonging altogether. I hope I did not fail you too.

 

I am excited to push through, looking to serve our global community, get a car, move out of my parent's beloved house and find my place in the world again as I did in Columbus. My goal is to move out of Los Altos by January 2022 and forge on. I am facing the fear of asking because I did not stay in touch regularly. This pride in myself has been challenging for me to witness and allow. I am working on letting go of old beliefs and ideas to live a healthier and happier life for Finn and myself, my family, YOU, and the communities I expand to serve. I realize I can't do this alone. I am thankful to everyone who impacted my life because you have, for me sharing this vulnerable moment and for dear friends encouraging me to write to start this fundraiser. It tells a lot about the innate kindness within us all and the faith of humanity, which I will forever be reminded to be grateful now and always. Thanks again. I am sending you my love. Finn and I are still here. xo

 

 

We love you!