Uncle Baa is what we (all his nieces and nephews) called him. He is my father's baby brother and was a son who lost his parents young. He has two other older siblings and was an incredible step dad to Yai's children and supported everyone as much as he could. He was loyal, loving, appreciative, and was never one to ask for help, but always gave help. I can't wrap my mind around how someone so kind and giving like him could go like this.

Often times, I think I am stronger than I really am. I find myself in deep, sad emotions, then find myself smiling thinking of my uncle’s smile and laughter. It really was infectious. He always made you feel welcome, even when not speaking many words. In his 47 years, he created a life for himself that we are all proud of, even though he didn’t have that much. It was filled with so much happiness and love. While the reason of his passing is something we feel could have been prevented, we find there’s so much peace in the love story he built with the love of his life, Yai.

My uncle and Yai were not vaccinated and spent their last month and a half on this earth and in our worlds in rooms next to each other within the ICU ward battling COVID. While scared and in pain, they used what energy they had to text each other to stay positive and keep each other's spirits up. This past Sunday, 8/22, doctors told us he went into cardiac arrest and they resuscitated him but would not recommend putting him through that pain in the future. His lungs were collapsed and unable to breathe on their own, if the ventilator was removed it would only take 10 minutes to pass. We chose not to remove the ventilator and the doctors did prep us saying we were near the end but like everyone, we were in denial and didn't realize that would be our last visit at the hospital; the last day he would be here with us. We watched in awe as the nurses wheeled Yai over one last time Sunday, so she was able to have some time with him, to hold his hand and say her goodbyes, and tell him it's okay to go. Watching that was so heart breaking, and you can't help but to think what if that were you? Their love was so strong, until the very end. He left us early Monday morning. Yai followed shortly and passed Wednesday morning. I tell myself it's because they couldn't live without each other.

Funerals are a way to commemorate our lost loved ones and ensure they get the proper burial or cremation they deserve, so their souls can be free. They are expensive and they fall on the shoulders of those who step up to be there and take care of their loved ones until the final goodbye. My uncle didn't have anything left over and worked paycheck to paycheck. My parents have been pulling money from wherever they can to help cover these costs, but I watch them struggle every day after my uncle's passing and they can't even take time to grieve on their own time because of our traditions so they stay busy and we try to figure out who is covering what at what point. We have amazing family and friends who've helped with covering food for these ceremonies, which can get costly for a large group. I also struggled creating this because I did not want to be just viewed as just another request, which is why it took me this long. I figured out it was my pride that I needed to put aside for the sake of my parents. Just like my uncle, I don't like to ask for help. I don't think any of us do, really.

We are so appreciative of those who have donated directly to my parents to help cover costs - it goes to the Lao funeral ceremony to the monks, but my parents are needing some assistance with the funeral costs for my uncle's cremation. The goal amount requested is solely for the funeral costs, we understand everyone is going through these same struggles. We hope to still be able to cover flowers, the Lao ceremonies (wreaths, monks, food, etc) from elsewhere. Any little bit you can help with, we would be forever grateful to you for.

Please think of Uncle Baa and Yai's love story and hold your loved ones tighter. Much love to you all.

Love,

Monique