Hormone treatment

Disclaimer : I would really appreciate if you read this description

Hi my name is Atticus and I am transgender. My transition, like many others, has been anything but easy and I have faced a lot of difficulty coming to terms with my identity, dealing with the response from others and being my own biggest supporter in my transition. I have been through a lot with my parents and coming out was the cherry on top. I now have no parents and little to no family. This has made transitioning really hard as 'little me' really needed someone to want to listen, understand and support me as any loving parent should do.

I have fought for myself for a number of years in my transition and sought out private hormone treatment which I began last year. The NHS waiting list is extremely long and my dysphoria was beating me to a pulp so this was a decision I made so that I could no longer just survive, but live. My plan was to start private and one day bridge over to NHS treatment and be on the waiting list.

Private hormone treatment is extremely expensive as they do extort you, knowing they are the only place you can receive the treatment you need while providing medical advice and checks. I have been paying an average of 90 pounds a month for a long time, even whilst not on hormones I had to pay 30 a month just to be with the service.

This amount is a lot for me as a student renting with my partner and can't be sustained right now due to financial situations out of my control and the fact that I have a million bills to pay as we all do!

I visited my GP today to discuss my transition for the first time. (for reference I am from Norwich but moved to Nottingham last year) I was told that because I am already receiving private care that I can't bridge over to the NHS, now or EVER. 'This is not something provided in Nottingham.' I got a real sense that the NHS are clamping down on offering help and medical care to trans people based on the awful guidance they have been given following from the governments agenda to hurt and villainise my community.

This has left me worried and scared for my future. I am a normal person, just like you, this is just the reality of being a trans person today. This care is essential yet treated as the absolute opposite.

Taking hormones has changed and saved my life. I can't explain how excruciating gender dysphoria is but it is just evil, as data has shown 82% of trans people have contemplated suicide and over 45% have had a suicide attempt. I can't imagine a life without this medical treatment because I NEED it to survive. Each day I have felt more comfortable with myself in a way I've never felt and I feel I am on the 'cusp' of where I need to be, stopping hormones now be massively detrimental.

I am honestly so tired of fighting to exist and would really appreciate the help as I am now uncertain of how I can maintain this crucial treatment.

Due to having no family/support other than a few close friends this is the only thing I could think to do right now. Any donations will directly fund my treatment, it would mean so much to me if anyone could help towards this. I am extremely grateful if you have read this far.

Thank you,

Atticus