Help Us Try — Our IVF Journey

We’re fundraising for IVF — because even with two incomes, the cost of fertility treatment is simply more than we can carry alone.

We’re a queer family, hoping to grow — and to welcome a second child into our world. That dream is now time-sensitive. And because NHS fertility pathways often exclude families like ours, we must cover the full cost ourselves.

Why IVF — and Why Now?

We’re already in treatment. After two unsuccessful IUI cycles this year, and with only one remaining ampoule of donor sperm — IVF is now our only realistic path.

I have a history of ectopic pregnancy and I am now 40, our clinical team believes IVF gives us the safest and best chance of success. But we don’t have unlimited time.

My age means medication doses must be higher, success rates begin to decline. This treatment is our last chance to try.

Our Story

In March 2020, we were preparing to start our family — the medication was in the fridge, and we were counting down to our treatment - days away… when we saw the Covid-19 pandemic about to hit. Despite worrying updates from colleagues in Italy - no one fully knew what was coming, but could feel it was going to be very serious.

At the time, I was working as an anaesthetic nurse on the NHS frontline. We made the tough decision to pause our baby plans. I felt a duty to stay and serve — to support patients and colleagues through crisis. My clinical work in a busy London NHS Hospital meant I was frequently exposed to high viral loads in theatres, resus, and critical care. It wasn’t the right time to get pregnant when I was working long shifts caring for some of our sickest patients.

Then sadly work life shifted in unexpected way. We had to pause and reassess, delaying treatment once again. Looking back, it was the right decision — but it came at a cost. Because time, as ever, moved forward. Shortly after we faced profound loss: my dad, and then my stepdad, died within six weeks of each other.

But in the midst of all that grief, something magical happened.

Our daughter was conceived through IUI and born in 2022. Becoming her parents has been the greatest joy of our lives. It changed everything for us and

something we will never take for granted.

We’ve always imagined having two children. It has always felt like that was our path. We both have siblings, and we have so much love to offer and know that our daughter will be an incredibly loving and caring big sister!

But the delays we’ve faced have taken their toll. They’ve cost us time — precious time in fertility years. And they’ve meant we’re no longer eligible for the more affordable IVF routes (like egg-sharing or multicycle access plans). We’re also excluded from NHS-funded treatment and we self funded all previous IUIs.

The Financial Reality

We’ve been fortunate to receive support from family in the past, which helped with treatment costs. We are both, working full time, and deeply grateful.

That financial support has now come to an end. Our monthly income goes to essentials — nursery, housing, travel, bills. We’re not in crisis. We’re just stretched — and IVF is simply out of reach without help.

Below are the recently confirmed costs from our clinic for our IVF journey.

Egg Freezing (per cycle × 3): £3,400 each, with the third cycle discounted to £2,550.

Egg Thaw and Embryo Creation (includes ICSI and Fresh Transfer): £3,450.

Stimulation Medication (for all three egg-collection cycles): £1,850 × 3 = £5,550.

Transfer Medication (for embryo-transfer stage): £850 (max).

TSH (thyroid function test): £55 — repeated every 3 months during treatment.

Virology (HIV / Hep B / Hep C / chlamydia): £121 — already paid for 2025; repeated annually.

Final totals

The total cost for completing all three egg-collection cycles and one embryo transfer is £19,376.

We’ve also included one frozen-embryo transfer in our total, allowing us to move forward smoothly and without delay if another attempt is required.

This would cost an additional £1,600, plus up to £850 for medication — bringing the total to £21,826.

Please only give if you feel able to —we would never want anyone to feel obliged. This is simply an invitation, offered because so many kind people have said, “I’d love to help if I can.”

Why This Matters

This is our final opportunity to try for another child.

This journey has never been about entitlement — we know we are so fortunate. It’s simply about hope, and doing what we know to be best for our family. For creating our own little joyful space in the world.

If you’ve ever known what it is to want something deeply — to picture something, to hold space for it, plan and hope…. and then watch that possibility narrow due to time, cost, or circumstance — perhaps this resonates.

Every £5 or £10 helps. And if you’re not in a position to give, sharing this could help too.

Thank you for reading, for caring, and for being part of our village.

With love and gratitude, Tianne and Carina x