Give Lavena the best send off she could wish for.

So where to start.. never ever did I think I would be in a position where I had to write these words.

My mum got diagnosed with small cell carcinoma cancer (lung cancer) in August 2024.

At the time she was informed it was a very aggressive type of cancer and it was terminal even though there was treatment available to help try and slow it down.

For the last 10 months she has attended appointment after appointment where she’s had to have X-rays, CT’s and MRI scans as well as constant blood tests. She has had rounds of Chemotherapy, immunotherapy and finally radiotherapy. Unfortunately treatment wise there is no more that can be offered.

This has been a devastating time for her as well as her family, to say she hasn’t had any kind of a life for the last 10 months is putting it as nicely as I can. My beautiful mum lost her lovely dark hair.. after having chemo. It started falling out and so she decided to have it shaved off. This for my mum was heartbreaking as it would be for any person, especially a women.

Anyone who really knows my mum knows she would give you the coat off her back. She has always helped anyone out in need if they required it. Even when she battled with her own mental health and numerous health conditions.

My mum’s cancer has decided it would spread to her oesophageal (the tube that carries food from your throat to your stomach) and it wasn’t done there it now has spread to her brain where she currently has numerous tumours and finally into her lymph nodes. All of this in the space of 10 months just tells you have aggressive this cancer is.

Since being diagnosed with the cancer in her brain she has deteriorated drastically.

It has affected her memory, balance, her mobility and she is no longer able to be independent like she once was. She requires aids to walk a short distance, needs help being washed, food prepared pretty much everything we as fit people do daily and take for granted.

My mum has always been independent and able to do things for herself so now having this horrible disease rob her of her independence is earth shattering on top of everything else to her and everyone who knows and loves her.

Time isn’t on her side I’m afraid to say so I’m now having to deal with planning my lovely mums funeral and giving her the best send off we as a family can do.

To make this possible I am asking that anyone that knows my mum share this page with all who knows her (friends/family) and help us try and make this possible. Rather than flowers when she passes, I am asking for people to donate whatever they can no matter how small to make this achievable for me to put towards the funeral costs.

I know times are difficult for everyone but whatever you can spare will make a difference.

As beautiful as flowers are they wilt away (my mums favourite flowers are tulips and I will make sure she has a nice spray including these.

We as a family would rather her have a send off she deserves and it be something we can look back on and remember Lavena (mum) by.

Please please please help make this possible.

Everything donated will make a devastating time in our lives a little more bearable taking the stress away of having to find the funds for me to do all of this all alone.

To say us her children are devastated to know we will no longer have her around is an understatement.. there is no words.

For me personally not seeing her photo appear on my phone when she calls, or her loud Scottish accent calling my name or seeing her smile is tearing me apart.. I actually feel like I haven’t come to terms with what’s happening as if it isn't real. I feel like I’m having an out of body experience.

My mum is going to be missed so so much by us all.

Her grandchildren are suffering and I’m so sad my younger two will not remember her or have memories of their own.

Anyway I just want to say thank you for taking the time to read this far.

And I will update on here accordingly with everything.

Pari & Aryan xx