Funds to help Shirley Ripley live at home

Hi, my name is Scooter Breisch. I am starting this go fund me for my mom, Shirley Ripley. My sister, Gina Zieber, and I are humbly coming to everyone we know to ask for help. We hate to have to ask for help, but we want to be able to do what is best for my mom. We need help to help pay for caregivers to come into her home and take care of her. We cannot do it all on our own. We are not financially able- my mom, Gina, or myself.

Some of you know, but not everyone does. Our mom had a stroke in November 2021 and had a large seizure. It was hard on her, but she seemed to be doing okay in recovering. We felt she was going to get back to normal and she was looking forward to going back to work at Busch Gardens. It did not happen. She seemed to start getting very forgetful and just acting very different and out of it. She started going to different doctors for different tests. In June 2022, she had another stroke. After this stroke we were told she had beginning stages of dementia and Alzheimer's. It was devastating for all of us. We never thought this would happen to our mom, but we knew there was a chance because her mom and grandma both had it. We continued going to doctors' appointments, specialists, medicines, etc. Things continued to develop such as hallucinations, seeing people, great fear and anxiety, forgetting people and family, not always being able to care for herself, and needing a lot of help. Those of you that know our mom knows she was never one to ask for help- she was always helping others. It has been really hard for her to adjust and live with this and definitely hard for Gina and I.

Over the past several months, she has been in the hospital and rehab several times. When we came to visit at Christmas, she could walk some on her walker with help, but had definitely gone downhill. The day after we left, she had some more episodes and went back into the hospital and then to rehab. Rehab did not really help. When she returned she was not any better. Over the past several weeks, she has declined quickly. She cannot walk at all, cannot sit herself up without help, she needs help with bathroom and hygiene skills, she either lays in her bed or sits in her chair for a little bit. Most of the time, she just stays in her bed in her room because she feels safe and is afraid she will fall.

A few weeks ago she had her first A Fib episode. This runs in the family. So just another thing to add to the list of health issues.

This past Monday, she was admitted back into the hospital with an infection and major confusion. They did several tests, blood work, etc., but have just determined she is progressing rapidly through the stages. As I said earlier, she cannot walk, sit up or turn over on her own, she now is struggling to feed herself, and cannot bathe herself or do basic hygiene. She is very confused. At times, she does not recognize Gina, the boys, and even at Christmas she sometimes forgot who all of us in my family are. It is a very sad situation. She does have some good days and we enjoy those whether in person or on the phone, but many are not good.

The doctors told us this week that there needs to be someone at home with her at all times. They are sending her home with a hospital bed and a hoyer lift to be able to help move her around because she is mainly dead weight because she is so weak and tired. They will not let her come home unless we have a plan to have this care in place.

This is why we need help. My mom never thought she would get sick and she never wanted to talk about wills, medical stuff, or funerals. Gina and I have tried several years to get her to do it, but she would never listen. Now we are in a situation where in some things are hands are tied. We are doing our best to sort through everything. Gina is the only breadwinner at the house. Her and the boys moved in with my mom six years ago and she has been her primary caregiver since before COVID. She pays all the bills except for the small amount of social security my mom gets to cover little things. My mom worked so hard all of her life, but never had a job with benefits or retirement or savings. She was always self-employed. She sacrificed so much for Gina and I and our families so we could be happy and blessed. She worked hard to keep her house and property even when she almost lost it through divorce. My mom has always been a fighter.

Gina cannot quit her job and I live 4.5 hours away where I am a minister and cannot just quit and come back to Newport News. Neither one of us make lots of money. We both live paycheck to paycheck and thank God we have jobs to take care of our kids. Social workers at the hospital are urging us to get medicaid and it will "cover everything." The problem is without any will or power of attorneys, for my mom to get medicaid, the state will seize everything she has- the house, car, and any money or things of value. We cannot let this happen. My mom would be devastated.

Our plan was originally to sell the house this summer/fall. My mom knew she eventually would need long term care in a facility, but wanted to stay at home as long as possible and we wanted the same for her.

Gina is gone to work from 8-5 everyday. The boys are at home at 2:30 everyday. We are going to have to hire someone to come in to cover the hours when my mom would be by herself. This is why we need your help. Gina and I also do not have lots of savings and retirements, etc. to use. We cannot afford to pay these caregivers on our own. Thankfully, a big portion of the amount can be paid by my mom's social security, but we are still going to need to come up with $800-1,000 more each month. Gina and I are going to try and cut corners, sell things, and give all we can give to help, but we do not have much. We have talked to numerous agencies in the past two days. None of them are cheap. We have found a couple that are okay and somewhat reasonable and we think could work IF we get some help.

Could you please consider helping us financially? We are hoping she can come home for the next 5 weeks and then go into rehab for 3 weeks. We are looking to sell the house and property NOW. We have a few leads already and are hoping that it can be sold by the time my mom gets out of rehab. After we pay off what she owes on the house, the rest of the money will be put into a trust that will help pay her monthly fee (along with her social security) to stay in a long term care facility. We do not have any guarantees right now, though, that the the leads will follow through and the house will sell. This is why we have a goal of $10,000. We want to get as much money donated as possible now in case we have to continue like we are planning to do for a few extra months.

We hope this all makes sense and is clear. I can be very wordy, but I wanted you all to see what we were up against and dealing with. In my mom's almost 75 years of life, she has ALWAYS been the one to help others- to sacrifice and care for others. Please help us help and sacrifice for her. We do not want her to have to lose everything she has worked so hard for to the state because we have no other options.

We ask also that you please pray for my mom. If you know my mom, she would never like to live this way and have to be taken care of. She has told us many times she does not want to be a burden and is sorry this is happening. She is not a burden to us. She is our mother and we love her and want to do the very best for her. Please pray we can do that and please pray God's will be done in her life. She has been a faithful Christian since she was a child. She loves the Lord so much.

Thank you for considering helping us out financially and prayerfully. One other way you could help if you cannot monetarily is come volunteer to sit with my mom and keep her company a few hours a week. The hours we can get someone to volunteer we do not have to pay a caregiver. She would love the company of people she knows and loves. Gina and I would greatly appreciate it.

The plan is for her to come home Monday or Tuesday, 2/13 or 2/14. We have to get funds NOW so we can get her caregivers lined up and ready to help. Those of you who know our mom know what a blessing she has been and is to so many people and maybe even to you. Please help us be a blessing back to her and let her be able to be at her home as long as possible.

Thanks again and if you have any questions, please reach out to myself or Gina through a private message. God bless you all.