Fundraiser for Stella and Veronika

Some of you will have heard that Jenny Gionet passed away on Sunday, April 19.  Cancer.  I knew Jenny as my dear friend Bob ‘Qball’ van Rees’ former partner and mother to Veronika and Stella.

I first met Jenny in the Yukon more than 15 years ago.  I had returned to Dawson City to visit Qball, who had stayed up there after we fell for the place during our summer sojourns in the mid-nineties.  Jenny’s daughter Veronika was just a little girl.  It was immediately evident what Q saw in Jenny.  She had a dazzling smile and a vibrant personality:  brassy, confident, and fun to be around.  I also suspect she wouldn’t have put up with any shit, not that I noticed any on that trip north.  She had the bright, sparkly eyes of a gorgeous young woman in love.  It was a beautiful thing to see and I was thrilled for him.  A Northern Light she was; no doubt about it.  Stella joined the family as a sister for Veronika a short time later.

Years passed and despite their best intentions their relationship didn’t work out.  I am coming to understand later in life that what happens after a split, at least when children are involved, is equally as important as what happens when things are going well.  In the time that would follow, Jenny and Qball always kept the girls’ interests at the forefront.  They were effective partners in this business of coparenting and worked well together.  In fact, when I last saw Jenny in mid-February she was helping Q move.  Think about that for a second. Helping him *move*.  We schlepped some boxes and talked about her Etsy shop and made loose plans for her to come to Toronto to go thrifting together—something we both enjoyed perhaps a little more than the average bear.  I was going to show her some of my favourite spots.  I’m sorry that we won’t now be able to have that experience together; there is nothing quite like a couple of kooks hot on the trail of second-hand treasure, especially when they hit the jackpot.

One of the toughest things we go through in the human experience is seeing people we love suffer.  I wonder if this is part of why Jenny kept her illness as quiet as she did.  Perhaps she didn’t want people to worry—I can’t say.  As if losing a mother is not already enough for a teenager to handle, Veronika has also lost her birth father.  I am heartbroken for the whole family.

These exceptional times in which we find ourselves unable to gather together, in which I am unable to follow my instinct to rush to a best friend’s side in a crisis, in which so many of us feel helpless and at the mercy of forces beyond our control, are challenging to say the least.  And they have just become incalculably more so for a family I care very deeply about.

I wish I could do more.  Unfortunately all the wishing in the world won’t bring Jenny back to her daughters, to her mother, to her family and friends.  As is often the case, I look for some comfort in the strength of friendship and of my friends.  I know that Q, as he always has, will be a dependable father figure to Stella and V, a rock-solid and steadying force for them in the difficult days, months, and years ahead.

I have seen in my circle what the power of community and generosity can do.  One such effort allowed a dear friend's wife to be by his side during his difficult and fatal journey with glioblastoma.  Another last year supported the family of friend who lost her battle with depression and allowed for therapy for her two boys to help them cope in a healthy way with the loss of their mother.  Another created a fund to send kids to camp in loving memory of a young son who was senselessly murdered.  I know that words are insufficient to express the gratitude these families feel.

So let us come together here.  This fundraiser has been created in loving memory of Jenny to support her two teenage daughters.

Please contribute to this fund for Veronika and Stella if you are able.   Please share this as widely as you can on social media so that it will reach as many of Jenny's friends and friends of the family as possible. 

Love each other.  Be good to each other.  Support each other.  Rest easy, Jenny.