Fulfill Stephanie's Last Wish for Her Family

Ryan and Steph's Motto: 
Do everything in LOVE - 1 Corinthians 16:14

 

My name is Kevin Kenny, and I’m Ryan’s father and Stephanie’s father-in-law. We are fundraising to fulfill Stephanie’s last wish for her family. We begin with a story. I will be writing this story from a father’s perspective on Ryan and Stephanie’s true love and Stephanie’s courage, sacrifice, and immeasurable will to live for her beautiful family till her last breath.

On March 15, 2022, the world lost one of its sweetest Angels far too young. Stephanie Michelle Snyder (Kenny) (aka Steph), Wife of Ryan, Mother to Paige, Tatum, Haven, and Broxton, succumbed to an 11- year battle with Melanoma cancer. The following story is not about how she passed but rather about how she lived. She fought with overwhelming bravery and faith for the chance to stay alive to be with the loves of her life. It’s a story of devotion between an All-Star high school cheerleader/dancer and the high school All-Star baseball player/quarterback, the “All American” dream relationship. A story of a husband who went “ALL IN” to keep his wife alive, at any cost, not thinking of where he would land financially because his goal was to honor Steph’s wish. That wish was never to give up, leave no stone unturned to keep her alive as long as possible, be a mother to her children, and prepare a platform for their future.

Ryan and Steph met 12 years ago. As fate would have it, they both came out of long-term relationships on the same day in 2010. Ryan and Steph connected on FB in late 2010. His first ever comment to Steph was a compliment on how beautiful her children were. Steph had Paige and Tatum from a previous relationship, and they were 4 & 2 when Ryan came into their lives. On Ryan and Steph’s first date, they spent hours talking and connecting deeply after dinner. From that night on, they were inseparable. Ryan fell in love with all 3 of them. When Ryan first told me about Steph, I remembered this mighty little cheerleader front and center on a gym floor in Tucson, Arizona, from our Pop Warner days. She had perfectly curled long blonde hair and red-stained lips from the team's lipstick. She was loud and proud and cute as ever. As it turned out, our families knew each other from Pop Warner, Pony Baseball and High School sports. Both his mother and I were happy for him.

Ryan quickly jumped into Steph’s life for the better. From being a fantastic father figure to Paige and Tatum to taking her and the kids on trips. He freed her up from financial burdens, encouraged her to finish Paul Mitchell Cosmetology school (which she did), and helped her do what she loved by coaching both girls in Pop Warner Cheer (like her Mama did). Ryan even coached both girls in softball too. Ryan would learn early on how much Steph loved the sun! She told him one of her favorite places on earth was the river, where she would go with her parents regularly. She was an avid water skier. At their home, Ryan said that as he came home from work, he could always find Steph chasing the sun laying out while watching the kids swim.

Early in their relationship, Ryan noticed a dark mole on Steph’s ankle that concerned him. Ryan grew up with his Grandad and me always at the dermatologist. He urged Steph to get it checked out by her family dermatologist. A punch biopsy was done in early 2011 that revealed a serious Melanoma cancer level that was spreading from day 1. Doctors quickly realized Steph’s aggressive metastatic melanoma cancer was already spreading to her lymph nodes in her groin area. Doctors at Loma Linda removed Steph’s lymph nodes during this time. Immunotherapy was not out yet, so doctors put Steph on interferon treatment, which was used for malignant melanoma cancer. Steph would get very ill and weak from this treatment. Family members and Ryan would transport her back and forth to receive treatments. Steph fought gallantly, endured the treatments, and performed her responsibilities. As time progressed, the cancer was held at bay to the point where no signs were detected.

The doctors encouraged Steph & Ryan to maintain regular checkups to monitor any potential new signs of the disease. The following six years brought happiness to their family. They bought a home, took various family trips, new cars, always went to concerts, coached sports and began a new chapter in their lives. On March 3, 2017, against doctors’ recommendations, twins Haven and Broxton were born and were perfect! Most importantly, Haven and Broxton were completely HEALTHY by the grace of God and by their mother’s will to protect them in her womb. They were and still are Ryan and Steph’s miracle children! There was so much joy in the Kenny household!

Next, Ryan and Steph were married on September 8, 2018, at a beautiful venue in Del Mar, CA. This spot held an essential value to them both. Ryan’s grandparents had recently passed away and resided there for years. Ryan also proposed to Steph on the bluffs in Del Mar with Paige and Tatum by their side. Ryan held his grandparents in very high esteem. His Nana and Grandad had bricks laid in cement years prior, commemorating members of the Kenny family. As we walked down the aisle, Ryan and I carried one of the twins. Stephanie was led down the aisle with her father Rick holding her hand. All of us walked across those bricks to the altar. Ryan gave Steph her dream wedding, and it was a day and night no one will ever forget!

About a week before the wedding, Steph noticed a lump in her groin area that drew concern. They decided to push through the wedding then have it checked. On October 4th, a month after their wedding, they received the devastating news that Steph had 3 malignant tumors in her left lung. Stephanie & Ryan would set precedence for her battle with Stage 4 Melanoma Cancer. At this point, Ryan started aggressively saving financially for his wife’s fight. Steph told doctors to bring on surgery which was recommended. Her first of 10 operations were conducted. Her first lung resection was done at Loma Linda hospital. Ryan was by her side every step of the way, helping his beautiful wife recover. Over time Steph healed, and routine scans were given to assure the cancer was gone. Simultaneously immunotherapy was now available.

Doctors gave Steph 3 rounds of Opdivo and Vervoy. Steph’s 3rd round of treatment of this medication duo almost took Steph out. She had a severe reaction where Ryan was constantly taking Steph to the ER, sometimes weekly, as her body wanted to shut down. Steph, Ryan and Steph’s mother decided it was best to move Steph to the City of Hope Cancer hospital in LA. Steph and Ryan spent the first few months straight in the hospital at COH, just stabilizing her at the beginning of 2019. Ryan would take a significant amount of time off work to spend days by his beautiful wife’s side while also getting back to the kiddos at home. Once Steph was stabilized from her side effects months later, another scan revealed 2 more tumors in her left lung. This surgery was performed at COH, where doctors removed her tumors and part of her rib bone. Ryan continued to be by his wife’s side and family members and friends to show their support and love. The Warrior Queen, as Ryan called her, continued to push through the pain, always with a smile on her face. It was truly incredible to see Steph’s strength, love, and perseverance for her family. Throughout this process, Steph continued to be an awesome mom and wife! Steph faced challenges along the way but overcame them through her strong belief in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Both Ryan and Steph grew closer to Him as her cancer progressed.

In late 2019 Steph and Ryan received news that this aggressive cancer was now in her brain. Throughout this devastating news, Ryan remained positive and was Steph’s ROCK! At this point, Ryan started to move things around financially for Steph to go “All In,” saving his wife by any means necessary. He was preparing for what he knew would be the biggest fight of their lives with him by her side every second. As the pandemic struck us in 2020, Ryan became laser-focused on Steph and his family. Ryan got Steph and their family together for a big river trip to Havasu in May 2020 to celebrate Paige’s birthday and Steph. Ryan knew Steph’s first brain surgery was just around the corner. They had a phenomenal trip with memories to last forever! During this time, Ryan completely stepped down from work and unloaded his retirement, stock accounts, assets, and you name it to prepare his family for what was to come in her first brain surgery. Ryan was ready and ready to sacrifice it all to save his wife. And believe me, he did!

Ryan started to dive into the medical books, research melanoma, doctors, holistic care, spiritual care, and different vitamin regimens and gave it all to Steph. I saw Ryan’s love for his wife & children grow stronger and stronger each day.

The following 6 months of 2020 proved to be the most difficult; Steph underwent 7 brain surgeries in 6 months. Two of the top neurosurgeons in this country operated on Steph. I remember Ryan telling me that after the 3rd brain surgery, Steph’s neurosurgeon told him he had never seen any type of cancer this aggressive in someone’s brain. He has been operating on patients for many years. It was heartbreaking to hear this, but I always remember hearing hope, faith, positivity and love pouring out of his voice every phone call. During this, Steph continued always to have a smile on her face and a joy that was so contagious. Everyone at COH knew Steph for that! From the security guards, doctors, nurses, and Starbucks employees inside COH, everyone who knew her loved her! In between surgeries, Steph would return home so she could be around all her children. Haven and Broxton would crawl in bed with her, and she would rock them to sleep, never complaining about her situation.

At this point, Ryan was constantly monitoring Steph’s meds and ensuring she was getting everything she needed to function correctly. Towards the end of 2020, things got rough for Steph & Ryan. Steph underwent her 7th brain surgery, and she had 8 brain tumors at one point. Steph’s neurosurgeon removed what he could safely. Shortly afterward, doctors put an Ommya port into Steph’s brain to inject immunotherapy directly into and around her tumors. I still remember Ryan quickly calling Steph’s parents and me as he had to make big decisions for Steph during this procedure quickly. Within a few days, Steph’s tumors grew around the Ommya port in her brain, partly clogging it down. Doctors did not know how injecting the immunotherapy would respond in this situation. There was a 50% chance of her dying right then on the table. Steph always wanted to remain aggressive and at the forefront of treatment. Ryan decided to pray and let the doctors push the immunotherapy into the Ommya. By the grace of God, most of the medication went in and quickly started to shrink down her tumors. Steph was in the ICU for a great deal of time, and the most devastating blow came when doctors discovered Steph had a blood and brain infection simultaneously. Steph was mainly in and out of consciousness during this time in the ICU. Doctors called numerous meetings with Ryan and their family. The likelihood of survival at this critical point was slim. 20+ doctors expressed to Ryan that taking Steph home on hospice was highly recommended at this point. One exception was Steph’s neurosurgeon. He believed Steph could overcome both infections and get back to immunotherapy once he took the Ommaya port out. Ryan eventually got into the ICU during the pandemic, but he would not back down from getting to his wife. He made contact with Steph, and she whispered to him, do not give up on me. That’s all he needed to hear, and before you knew it, Ryan was in front of a panel of doctors at COH fighting for his wife to pursue treatment and take every measure possible to save her, which had to be approved by them first. Ryan made his case and challenged the doctors, and they agreed for him to start fighting back against both infections aggressively and then pursue immunotherapy. Against all odds, Steph overcame both infections.

Ryan had to continue to hang IV antibiotics at home for about one month post ICU. Doctors were astonished by Steph’s response and will to overcome. Steph returned to the necessary immunotherapy treatment that started to keep everything stable. Shortly after this, Ryan had Steph zip lining in Las Vegas on a family trip. I remember seeing a picture of her zip lining with the biggest smile on her face. Doctors couldn’t believe their eyes on the progress Steph was making. That year they continued treatment; Ryan would also seek holistic treatment for her in Orange County. Ryan and a couple of buddies created the first-ever complete home alkaline water system for Steph, which she thrived from. Ryan helped do some R&D work there, and Steph’s neurosurgeon was impressed. I remember Ryan taking Steph and their family on numerous memorable trips in 2021. Steph and Ryan’s love and faith continued to grow before my eyes. During this whole time, Ryan would take daily phone calls from Steph’s doctors and make adjustments on meds to help her. At this time, I saw Steph becoming closer to our Father God. Ryan would always tell me how much they became closer to Him through this journey. They would always pray daily as a family.

Towards the end of 2021, Steph’s health was starting to take a turn for the worse. Her brain edema was beginning to get painful, and Ryan adjusted meds/steroids even more to control it. Unfortunately, as Steph’s steroids increased to control her brain edema, doctors paused immunotherapy for 4 months. Between Steph’s med regimen and supplement regimen, Ryan managed over 100 hundred pills a day for her during 2021. Doctors saw how invested Ryan was in Steph’s health battle at the highest level. He knew Steph the best and knew what worked and didn’t to a science. Shortly after what was Steph’s last trip to watch her daughter Tatum compete in an all-star cheer competition in Las Vegas with the family, she got really sick.

Ryan noticed Steph entirely off-balance, leaning while walking, head pain and confusion. He rushed Steph back up to COH 5 days before Christmas. The first initial doctor at the ETC there thought Steph was okay, but Ryan knew something was severely wrong. The doctor tried to discharge Steph without a CT scan of her brain, and Ryan, with the help of a social worker, forced the doctor to order a CT scan which revealed Steph’s tumor had grown 40% and was hemorrhaging. Steph’s brain also shifted from left to right significantly. Ryan’s instinct and persistent nature saved Steph right then and there. They quickly rushed Steph into the ICU to get the lifesaving meds she needed. Steph's neurosurgeon explained that he needed to do an 8th brain surgery to save Steph. Before surgery, Ryan could get Steph out of the ICU for a short time for family to love, hug, and kiss her. Steph was not in good condition.

On 12/29/2021, Steph underwent a 5-hour brain surgery with success. Steph’s neurosurgeon removed most of the tumor, stopped the hemorrhaging, and cleaned up the edema. This was a deep surgery, and their neurosurgeon was fearful of potentially losing Steph’s vision, but he was able to keep Steph’s vision intact. Ryan would not leave his wife’s side. He spent Christmas and New Year’s in the ICU with Steph. He brought her Christmas gifts and cards from the children that missed Mommy so much, and they made the best of it together. Ryan would bounce back home to their 4-year-old twins in Murrieta and back up to Steph daily in LA. Steph spent 35 days in the hospital post-surgery. Steph had a rough time recovering, and eventually, doctors put the hope of getting Steph better and in a position for the immunotherapy back in Ryan’s hands. Immunotherapy was highly unlikely as Ryan would have to pull out a miracle along with the home health team this time. Immunotherapy was the only treatment to keep Steph’s cancer at bay over the years.

Steph was discharged home via ambulance, and Ryan would spend the next 33 days taking care of Steph around the clock with minimal sleep. Most of us had to remind him to eat, take a shower, and get some rest when he could. Ryan and Steph made progress during this time! Ryan’s love for his wife and children fueled him and her saying, “TO NEVER GIVE UP HOPE.” This was a saying on Steph’s cancer ribbon flag that continues to fly high at their home. She loved that flag, and that was always their motto together from the beginning. During this time, family and friends would visit and pray with Steph, which she loved. All of Steph’s children would spend hours with her in bed. Rick and Sherrie, Steph’s parents, would stop by to drop off protein shakes and heat packs to help. Ryan’s Mom, Eva, moved in with them to help with the kids and help Steph through the long nights by cooking food and helping Ryan battle through the nights with his beautiful wife. I remember Karrissa, Brooklyn, and Carter always coming over to help. Ryan and Steph would treasure these acts of kindness and the love of their family. Perhaps the most unsung hero was sweet Haven, age 4 at the time, day in day out; she would continuously be there to help Ryan care for her Mommy. This little girl is beyond her years. Her love and willingness to take care of her Mommy was extraordinary to witness over the years and brings me hope. Haven would drain the catheter bag, place heat packs on mommy’s head, massage mommy’s arms, help with meds, breathing treatments and always tell her mommy, “I love you, and everything is going to be okay.” Haven, Broxton, and Ryan would pray daily together with Steph holding each other’s hands.

Steph shocked doctors once again and made it back to COH to restart her immunotherapy treatment that had worked for the prior year. Steph returned home after the treatment but was soon rushed back to the hospital due to low sodium levels. She continued to battle, and Ryan and her parents had a meeting with the COH medical team to discuss the goals that lay ahead. At the meeting, Stephanie was still communicating and eating. Stephanie took a turn for the worse. Doctors soon discovered 7 large tumors in her liver and two large tumors in her lung. Ryan still didn’t give up hope. He had plans to keep his wife comfortable but to do some minimally invasive procedures that were aligned with the palliative care to help relieve her symptoms if they could keep her stable to return home. Steph's conditions quickly worsened, and Ryan was permanently glued to his wife’s bedside, not letting go of her hand.

Ryan was able to get family members, who had been covid cleared, in to visit Steph. Those included her mother, father, Paige, Tatum, Karrissa, Brooklyn, and me. Ryan fought hard to get approval to bring in the twins and won. During these final moments, Steph needed all four of her children’s love and touch. As one last example of her unfailing strength, Stephanie held on until the twins left the room. About three minutes later, Steph passed away in Ryan’s arms as Ryan played some of their favorite music together, Iration- Zen Island and their wedding song Kane Brown- Heaven. Steph opened her eyes to see Ryan’s face one last time before taking her last breath. He told me he knew exactly what she told him, “I Love You and Thank You.” Ryan said that Stephanie left this world with a slight smile, knowing her Father God was taking her home.

Steph had hundreds of doctors over her time at COH. Many doctors came into the room after Steph passed, led by Dr. Chen, Steph’s neurosurgeon and #1 advocate. I was there when he looked Ryan into his eyes and said he had seen thousands of cancer patients’ families and advocates over his years, but he has never met someone like my son. Someone who challenged western medicine and went to the extremes out of love for his wife and children. He said word for word that “Steph got in the last two years of her life because of you” Ryan dropped to his knees after hearing this. The sentiment was the same from all the doctors. Both Steph and Ryan gave them hope in moving forward in their practices. Tears were flowing from everyone’s eyes in the building.

Ryan knows he left no stone unturned in her battle and never gave up on her or accepted her fate. He put his faith in surrendering to our Father God in love and hope for his beautiful wife. Ryan believes you are measured in life by what you do or do not do and always do out of love. He knew our Father God was watching him and Steph fight this horrible disease in love, hope and faith, and our Father God was the one to reward them with the extra memorable years they got to spend as a family they will cherish forever.

This fundraiser is dedicated to the memory of Stephanie Michelle Kenny and her strength to persevere for her family out of love. It is dedicated to a husband’s will and devotion to sacrifice it all for Stephanie’s wish to be around her family and children as long as possible. Ryan is not one to ask for help. Therefore, I’m telling their story and sharing it with you all. It’s time to rally for this family and honor Steph’s wish.

Their story brings us hope in tough times and brings us all closer to Him, our Lord and Savior. Steph always wanted to leave a financial contribution for each of her children in her name but could not obtain a life insurance policy because of the aggressiveness of her cancer from the start. Ryan didn’t plan for a funeral or a celebration of life as he went “All In” toward saving her for the past 11 years and making the last years of her life memorable. The money raised will also go towards a memorial in her and her family's name at City of Hope hospital in LA and at the venue where they got married in Del Mar, CA. Ryan plans to create memory items for each child to hold onto for a lifetime. He would also like to get the children and family together for a journey to spread some of Steph’s ashes in her happy places and rejoice in love and God’s glory.

And finally, to help Ryan and his family get back on their feet in due time. Give as big or as small as you can. Let them know you care and share this story and campaign for an incredible family. God bless you all!

 

Respectfully,

Kevin M. Kenny

 

Contact me through gofundme if you have questions. 714- 926- 4231