For Jonathon Ivy

Hi everyone, my name is Alicia and I am one of Jonathan’s best friends. I wanted to share some sentiments about him first, then I’ll explain this gofundme last and include some details about his memorial. Please excuse me if I ramble too much, I’ve never had to write one of these before and I never thought I would. I will always have his back though, and this is the last way that I can show it to him. From the very beginning, we protected each other fiercely, so I guess that’s where I’ll start- the beginning.

We met when he was in the 1st grade and quickly became family. Jonathan attended Kohl School where he was shown love and acceptance by everyone. Everyone gave him a place where he would be himself, fearlessly and without judgement. I know that these moments were some of the best that he ever had. I would have to say that I think elementary school and highschool were his favorite times in his life. The friendships and support he received made it that way. The teachers he met allowed him to spread his wings and fly and his friends made him feel loved and cherished for who he is. Being able to be yourself is such a blessing. A blessing you ALL helped give him.

Jonathan and I were among a group of friends who acted as each other’s support system and found comfort and solace in one another through the many hard times that we’ve faced as children. We grew up up together, and as siblings do, we grew to have similar attitudes, outlooks on life and similar ways of communicating. We encouraged positive behaviors and ways of thinking. One thing that we both believed in was randomly sending supportive and kind messages to each other and our friends, to remind one another that we’re not alone. We would talk for hours about our feelings and thoughts, bouncing ideas off of each other and allowing each other a safe space to feel heard and validated. I know that many of you had the same experience with him. This is one quality about Jonathan that touched many people. He was always very kindhearted and in touch with how he was feeling. He was uniquely himself, a true individual. Of course, it hadn’t always been that way, as he faced many trying situations and hardships in his life. But through it all, I don’t think that there was ever one conversation where he didn’t laugh or smile at least once. He loved to make other people feel happy and loved. He didn’t want to be a burden. Even through his darkest days, he stayed positive and uplifting. His boisterous laugh and his spirit were attributes that he will always be known for.

He genuinely loved each and every one of his friendships. They were of great importance to him. Connection and warmth are two words that come to mind when I think of him. As I’m sure everyone’s aware, his passion was music. I still remember the very first times that he ever picked up an instrument. He was hooked right away! We would practice music together, as I also shared his passion for music at that time. So you can imagine how happy he was to be accepted into one of the best universities and to be able to study music surrounded by other talented musicians. It was his dream come true! And he did it! It was never easy for him but he pushed through. The love that he felt truly kept him going. He was such a kindhearted and gentle giant. He was dedicated to his studies and exceeded expectations. But I wouldn’t be doing him any justice if I didn’t mention this other side of him….

Let’s be honest, he was a little wild. Wait, let me correct myself. He was very wild!!! He loved to dance, sing and express himself in creative ways! Singing Dungeon Dragon and almost convulsing while rapping the chorus during lunch are memories that I love. He was definitely an entertainer! And that was his goal. He loved to make people feel happy. He had dreams of becoming a well known solo artist. And I never for a second doubted that he would. Actually, I’d bet that you felt the same. He had undeniably raw talent and worked so hard to learn as much as he could about music. He poured his heart and soul into his music. I think it gave him a safe place to express his pain and deep emotions too. He was dedicated. But…. He was SUCH a perfectionist! He was definitely his worst critic. He had so much passion that it hurt him, and the music industry is SO hard to break through. There have been countless hours where he would feel SO sad, hopeless and discouraged but there were also times where he would feel so proud of himself, as if he found his purpose, and you could feel the fire in his soul radiating through him! He would be buzzing with joy from the way that music and his music career impacted him. Being able to be around so many talented and like minded musicians was the biggest blessing for him, so thank you to everyone who shared his passion. Thank you to everyone who ever made him feel safe. Thank you.

My goal with this gofundme is to give people a place to help his family at this time, especially his mother, Karen. Losing a child is the most heart breaking thing on this planet. I lost my brother, we lost a friend, but she lost her baby. It’s horrible and heart breaking, my deepest condolences go out to her. What Jonathan forgot was that he wasn’t alone. He has us, his community, his friends, his family. We can rise up together and donate money on behalf of Jonathan for his mother. Jonathan loved his mom with all of his heart and he would want her to be taken care of. We can never take away the pain that she feels, but we can temporarily release some of the financial burden for her. That would make things a little easier for her, in this time. I love you, Karen. I love you so much. And I loved your son. He knew it. The last thing that he said to me was,

“Always gonna make it through even if the darkness feels like it’s consuming you”

He passed away by suicide at the age of 24.

I will be hosting a memorial service on Saturday at 1pm. I will update you all on the location as soon as I can. We will have a balloon release, there will be food, there will be his favorite music being played and something for us to sign to give to his mother. All proceeds will go to his mother, this event will not be funded from this gofundme. I highly encourage anyone to send or post pictures that they have of him or videos. Feel free to share any of your experiences or condolences here. You can also contact me on Instagram @metanoia_blossom.

And last, I’m sorry for your loss. Our loss. This is a heavy loss. Let’s come together for Jonathan and his mother during these dark times. And May he Rest In Peace.