In Memory of Hank (Harold) Gay
To know Hank is to love Hank. And to know Hank is to be able to identify his unique toe-walking from blocks away. Supported by tremendously admirable calves, Hank didn’t always walk a straight line but he always got to where he was going. Often showing up early.
A story teller of exceptional authority, his hilarious recounting of not-to-be believed stories were not to be believed. Except that it was Hank telling them. So you believed him. And wanted more. Who else was up at 4am, gym bound, witnessing back-alley exploits?
A polymath, perpetually learning beginner’s Spanish, always inventing reinventing, reading and DOING. An incredible writer, whose appreciation for the absurd ran deep. An artist, an illustrator, a maker, a long distance walker, a short-short wearer. A self-proclaimed teen sci-fi nerd, a spiritual seeker, a tarot card reader and most recently a reiki practitioner. A lover of dogs, of books, of pickles.
Hank wasn’t afraid of the unknown. He was a calm in chaos and amongst the messiness of it all, he was there to listen and make sure you felt heard. He had no patience for unkind people but would never be unkind in return. He stood up for what he thought was just, but never confrontationally so. Always humble, he regarded the insecurities of others not as weaknesses but rather helped further his understanding of his own relation to them.
As an art director in the film/television industry, he was an unassuming force, problem-solving with grace and acting as the safe landing for those stressed. As a friend, he stood by with a judgment-free openness offering supportive words that were never forced or sentimental. Just earnest and honest and true. As he himself was.
A text reminder of a shared hilarious moment or an adorable animal pic was enough to know that Hank was thinking of you, supporting you, there for you. He was entirely selfless in his devotion to those he loved.
Hank was a man who had as many plans for an adventurous future as he had pictures of random dogs in the streets. A man whose bliss was being smitten by his beloved pup Mochi. A man who loved and cared deeply for his life partner Oscar, until he couldn’t anymore. And now it’s our turn.
Hank’s sudden passing has left Oscar with a debt of medical expenses from his care at a Mexico City hospital. Donations will help go toward medical bills, aftercare costs, loss of primary income as well as taking care of Mochi.
Hank’s loss is felt worldwide. He will be dearly missed by his family, close friends and colleagues in Canada and Mexico, the Toronto film industry, and most recently the crews he worked alongside in Ireland, Canary Islands, Iceland and beyond.
Please help contribute to our Hank, Hanky, Hanko, our Harold, who toe-walked into our hearts and left a massive imprint there. We appreciate all your loving thoughts and donations.
A celebration of life is being planned. We will update with details.
With Love Joelle, John, Katy, and Yasmyn