Financial Help for Sharon Barnes

Hey there. For those of you that don't know me, my name is Miranda and my mother is Sharon Barnes (Wagoner is her maiden name). Recently, my mom began having some minor...well what we thought were minor health ailments. She chalked it up to her fibromyalga flaring up and just dealt with it. Well within the past couple of weeks, things have taken a drastic turn for the worse.

A little over a week ago, we had to rush mom to the ER. She was having abdominal pain, confusion and could not walk and/or stand without assistance. Her lab work showed that her potassium levels were low, so fluids were administerd thru an IV and she received 2 pills to increase her potassium levels. While she was there that night, the ER doctor decided to do a CT Scan w/Contrast. The results were not at all what we expected. They showed that mom had a big mass on her lungs and lots of little spots on her liver. We were pretty stunned by the results to say the least but mom was discharged just a couple of hours later, with a single piece of paper explaining her type of cancer, the name of a lung dr. she should follow up with, still unable to stand without assistance, still confused and an answer of, "once her potassium levels are straightened out, her mind should come back and she should be fine". Well the was so far from the truth that it's almost laughable.

So mom came home and for a day or so, her mind seemed a bit more clear but no further improvements. Fast forward to a few days later and I walked into the bathroom and there my mom was, laying on the floor. She just kept saying she was hurting but couldn't pinpoint the pain. She was extremely confused and pretty incoherent. We had to end up calling the ambulance because she once again, had no strength to stand, yet alone walk.

This time though, she was sent on to St. Joseph. When she first arrived, her blood pressure kept bottoming out. They had to end up putting in a central line to feed her constant medication to stabilize her blood pressure. She has remained completely confused and can't seem to rationalize the most basic of thoughts. She has not been eating or drinking so they put a feeding tube in yesterday. Almost immediately, she jerked it back out so they haven't bothered putting it back in. As of now, they are still replacing her electrolytes through an IV.

A couple of days after she arrived at St. Joe, a biopsy of her liver was performed and we got the results back yesterday. As suspected, mom has small cell lung cancer. This is a very nasty type of cancer that is incurable. Its a very aggressive and quick spreading type. In my mom's case, it has already spread to her liver, which is basically ate up with cancer cells. The reason for her confusion and incoherence is almost certainly due to the cancer spreading to her brain.

Speaking to her cancer doctor yesterday, my brother and I have made some decisions. Just in the few days mom has been in the hospital, Dr. Pierce has noticed a major decline in her health; physically and mentally. Due to the aggressiveness of this form of cancer, the fact that mom is already becoming jaundice because her liver is shutting down, her mental capacity and the frail state that her body is in, Dr. Pierce has estimated that my dear sweet mother's time on this earth is coming to a close and she has but just a couple of weeks left.

Taking all of this into consideration, my brother and I have decided to make and keep mom as comfortable and peaceful as she can be. Hospice has been called in and at this time, we have decided to not go through with chemo treatments, as they will most likely cause more harm than good. With that being said, we do not want to put her through rounds and rounds of intense treatments, just to delay the inevitable by a few days. As Dr. Pierce stated, with a cancer as severe and debilitating as small cell lung cancer, a healthy person can start chemotherapy immediately and it may give them 7 to 12 months. In my mom's case, it could potentially give her a few more days. My brother and I love our mother too much, than to watch her suffer anymore.

1 month ago, our lives were relatively normal and now...well...our lives have been completely turned upside down. I can't speak for my brother but as far as me...I don't even think I've even had a chance to process things. The rage that this type of cancer has on a body and mind is absolutely horrible and ridiculously unfair. 1 month ago, my mom was this loud, uncensored, funny, imperfectly perfect, beautiful hippie soul and now...well...shes still all of the above...just more spiritually than physically.

As you can imagine, the last couple of weeks have been a complete whirlwind for our family. I don't think you can ever prepare yourself for the news that we've had to swallow. Tyler and I were not and never will be prepared to let our dear sweet mother go but unfortunately we have to face the cold, hard truth. With all of that being said, there is something that we must ask of our mother's near and dears. She has no life insurance, burial insurance, savings or anything. She, along with millions of other people, was living paycheck to paycheck and had no nest egg. My brother and I are in similar situations and do good to keep our own heads afloat. So we're coming to you guys for help. This is by no means an ideal situation and we hate having to ask for help. I can't tell you how embarrassing it is just knowing that you can't even bury your own mother but in all honesty, we can't. So we're coming to you guys as humbly as possible. If you're able and would like to donate to my mom's burial and final expenses fund, every little bit will help. Like many of people in this situation, this is something my mom didn't plan on happening and quite frankly, something she couldn't afford. My mother has always been a bit more on the simplistic side and if it was up to her she would say, "Let Tyler build me a box, Miranda can write down something sweet to say, Lawson can write down something funny to say and Daphne and Phoenyx can decorate a big rock for a headstone". Sadly, life nor death is that simple but im sure we all wish that it could be. Also, if you're not in a situation that allows you to donate any monetary value, please for my mother's sake, do not feel bad or guilty! That is the last thing she would want and we completely understand! Times are hard on all of us nowadays. But there is one thing I will ask of all of you who are reading this...Pray! God performs miracles every single day so here's to hoping he performs one on my momma. And at the same time, if he needs her more than we do here, please pray for comfort, peace and no more pain for my sweet mom.

Lots of Love!

Miranda