Expense for Q bears treatment.

On July 27th 2023 our life was forever changed with five little words. “I think Quintin has leukemia.” No one ever wants to hear the word cancer, but especially not when the word is applied to your five year old child.

As a mother I spend a lot of time worrying. Am I doing enough for my children, do I give them enough attention, etc. Even with five kids I still question whether I really have this whole motherhood thing down. Top that with general anxiety about pretty much everything and I'm often second guessing myself,and worrying.

So two weeks prior to July 27th when Quintin started getting fevers at night I notched up the worry a little. I wasn't positive he was actually feverish because the kids are obsessed with thermometers and somewhere along the way it got lost. Probably in a toy box or something.

The fevers would often only last for a few minutes. Not even enough time to get anyone else to agree with me that yes he felt warm. He had absolutely no other symptoms of being sick. I thought it was odd, but figured it was just some little cold bug he was fighting off.

Then about a week later I noticed his lips were really really pale. At least in my opinion. I asked everyone else, "does Quinny look pale to you?" Some agreed, some didn't,but I just knew he was. I spent an entire night with my anxiety, or mom intuition, screaming at me that something just wasn't right. We made an appointment with his new doctor, his old one moved elsewhere. Since he's a new patient they said they couldn't get him in until September 8th. We took the appointment but I just felt like that was nowhere near soon enough.

That night I almost took him into the ER.

He was burning up again, our new thermometer said his temperature was only 98.6. I knew it was wrong. This time everyone agreed that he was burning up and also paler than usual. I gathered clothes, he was sleeping in his boxers, and was just about to wake him up to take him into the ER. He was sleeping so well though and once again his short lived fever was already gone. So I talked myself out of it. I thought, I'm just being paranoid. It definitely wouldn't be the first time.

I asked my sister to bring her thermometer the next morning so I could compare them. Then spent another night riddled with worry. Instead of having him sleep in his bed I had him in bed with Kenny and I all night. I stayed awake again, noticing every time he felt warm and cooled shortly after. I watched him even closer that day. Usually when he plays Xbox he jumps literally the entire time. This time he laid down while he played. When the girls went out on the trampoline he followed and only stayed for a few minutes before he came back in. When they went to play in the water hose he wasn't interested in going. He played cars quietly on the foot stool. Quinny is an energetic chatterbox. He never stops moving, or talking. My worry rose more.

After his cousin left he laid on me and cuddled while we were watching a movie. He almost immediately fell asleep. That is unlike Quinny, he doesn't nap, ever. To top it off, he didn't want to wake up. He kept telling me, "no mommy, I'm so comfy." This was what pushed me over the edge.He's usually a very light sleeper. My baby was not himself and I knew something was wrong.

We went straight to the ER. The whole time it's in the back of my mind that this could be ALL. Usually Google is not a paranoid mother's friend. It always highlights the worst case scenario. I believe in researching everything though. Knowledge is power. You still never really expect the doctor to tell you that they think your child has leukemia. That happens to other people. Not your own baby. Except this time it was my baby and my worst nightmare had come true.

His diagnosis was confirmed on the 28th of July and from there we have been riding this roller coaster we never wanted to get in and we can't get off. We have had more chemo and lumbar punctures than I can count at this point. Blood and platelet transfusions. An allergic reaction to chemo that scared us all. Numbers so low he just wants to lay there and do nothing but cuddle. Fevers that sent us to the hospital in a panic worrying about infections that his weakened immune system couldn't fight off. There has been good too. Amazing kind people that want nothing more than to help us in our greatest time of need. An incredible oncology team that has become like a family to us. And despite everything our Q-Bear is still full of light, laughter, and a quick wit that constantly has us laughing. He is a fighter and we are all right here fighting with him and learning how truly strong we are.

Quintin has just finished Frontline treatment and started maintenance. What this means is less trips to the clinic, and that our life will hopefully be a little more normal. Quintin is still battling cancer though. He takes chemo every night and twice a day on Wednesday. He gets an IV antibiotic once a month and lab checks, and once every three months he gets a lumbar puncture with intrathecal (injected into the spine) methotrexate and chemo in his port.

Our biggest expenses are currently gas, our current bills and groceries. Missing work for appointments affects our household budget making it harder to make ends meet. Quintin’s taste buds are constantly changing from the chemo. What he likes one day he may hate the next. When he wants something we try our best to get it immediately because some days he barely eats. We are so grateful to each and every person that has helped us along the way. I don't know where we would be without all of you and we can never thank you enough.