I'm Josh Gatewood, I'm not one to do things like this or ask for help in general. But I no longer know what other options I have.

This year has been trying to say the least. Being a disabled Marine Corps combat vet has presented many challenges over the years on its own. As with most vets that sustained injuries or trauma from our service they only get worse with time. Early this year I had an artery burst in my forehead while I was at work, because of the location of the artery and the rate I was bleeding out the local ER had to transfer me to ST. VINCENT MEDICAL CENTER for treatment. I flatlined for a few seconds from loss of blood. I was held in the ICU for a week while they treated me. Recovery from the loss of blood was expected to take weeks to months. After weeks of trying to rebuild my body from the loss of blood and everything that comes with that, I started to notice things changing with me. My throat was sore often, lots of pain in my jaw and I was getting a lot of migraines. Being the type of person I was I just pushed myself harder exercising, increased my food and vitamin intake and water consumption thinking I could get better. The pain in my jaw increased, so I went to a dental surgeon to get checked out. They found bad dental work fr9m my time in the service and infection in my jaw bone. They recommended surgery and put me on antibiotics. The extent of the surgery needed was going to be above 23k out of pocket. So I started working towards that. My health was slowly declining and I started to have healthy teeth fallout and I was starting to rapidly lose weight. I opted to have all my teeth pulled and get dentures for a faster fix to what seemed to be the problem. After that surgery was done it seemed my health was starting to turn around and I was improving.

A couple weeks later I noticed my weight was still dropping, my throat was swelling, I was starting to struggle talking and it was getting difficult to swallow. I took over the counter medicine, adjusted my diet and rested as much as I could. Nothing seemed to be helping me and my symptoms were slowly getting worse. I started to get exhausted quickly, over heated easily, I got dizzy often and no matter what I did I seemed to always be tired.

I finally listened to someone very close to me and went and seen a doctor. I explained what I was dealing with and had been going through, they checked me out and said it was clear something was wrong but even with soft tissue x-rays they couldn't find anything. So they referred me to a ENT doctor. From the start of things to this point it's been about 8 months and when trying to get into doctors it's never fast. I finally got an appointment and was seen. At the initial exam they assumed it was a bacterial infection caused by the artery burst and it was moving through my body. They prescribed me a couple antibiotics but also set up a CT scan to see if they could find the reason for the pain and swelling in my neck. By this time I was barely sleeping because my saliva production was so heavy it felt like I was drowning every time I laid down.

I got the CT scan and had a follow up appointment. They said there was a definite mass in my neck but it wasn't clear on what it was. So they set up another CT scan and a high resolution MRI. They then put in a referral to a top ENT surgeon at IU Health.

To make an already hard situation harder I lost my younger brother on 9/11/2025 to cardiac arrest. Because of my health I was not able to be there at the hospital or to be with family to say goodbye to him.

I went to my appointment at IU health and just a few minutes with the surgeon he made it clear how serious this was and how far behind the medical field was on the things I needed. I had lost almost 50 lbs., most of my muscle mass was gone, I was barely able to eat or sleep and was surviving on protein shakes and ibuprofen. The surgeon put in a list of referrals for me to have a swallow study done, to see a speech therapist, to get a feed tube installed in my stomach, to have a fine needle biopsy completed and follow up appointments for absolutely everything to prepare me for the surgery I need to have the mass removed from my neck.

So as of today the mass in my neck is attached to the base of my skull, my jawbone, it's in my saliva gland, it's paralyzed my left vocal cord and attacking my facial nerve which has started to paralyze. My left eye lid is drooping and my left eye will no longer dilate properly so I have constant migraines because my eye can't filter light properly anymore.

I am now currently on disability. The surgery I need is roughly 10 hours long and extremely difficult because of tge location and everything around it. They have to remove the mass which has grown just larger than 2" in diameter, they have to shave the base of my skull and jaw bone, pull muscle, ligaments and tendons tight in my face to stop it from drooping, they have to add weight to my eye lid so I'm able to blink and they have to remove a large chunk of my thigh to rebuild my neck. I have to see a speech therapist and swallow therapist to learn how to talk and swallow differently and I'll be getting nutrition through a feed tube in my stomach for an unknown amount of time. If everything goes smooth I should be able to be fully recovered in 11 months from the date of surgery which hasn't been set yet.

I have completely given up the life I worked very hard to rebuild and reclaim. I had to give up all luxuries and my home to be able to attempt to afford the treatment and care I need. Some days are a struggle to get out of bed and I find myself questioning life in general. None of this is easy from excepting my condition, telling loved ones or asking for help.

The mass in my neck is cancer, it's a salivary gland cancer. Because of the characteristics and how it grows and spreads its extremely hard to detect. It was not detected in me until late stage 3. I'm barried in medical bills and struggle to keep up with daily expenses now. The physical and emotional pain seems to never let up topped with stress of bills and life. I have a child that I'm not able to see because I ran out of money to pay an attorney. It's very hard to stay positive when everything seems to stay stacked against you. But I'm lucky enough to have a couple people who care and love deeply that keeps me pushing forward to get past this for what I hope is a much brighter tomorrow.

I know times are hard for everyone and it's not always easy to donate to someone else's problems. But I hope reading this at least helps others realize how important the little things in life are from that 1 special person, to 5 minutes with our children to a new cough. It all matters.