Keep Emme Safe & Get Her to Canada

Hey! I'm Emme, an AuDHD trans woman HUMAN, artist, commedienne, shy people and risk-takers consultant, podcaster, performer of all kinds, just a newer-realized-to-always-have-been-secretly-a-girl standing in front of you, my sweet & supportive & wonderful audience, asking for help to lighten the load of transition.

Especially as my country of residence executive orders away my existence and wants to ship me to male prison if I step out of line (or into a woman's bathroom). Seriously. I need to leave.

No amount large or small will be turned away. I welcome all support -- if it's valuable to you, it's valuable to me!!

I know it's unusual -- trans folks only make up about .1% of the population, and we do things like take hormones and change our looks and our names. But we do it, or at least I do it, because it makes me so much happier to be myself.

I talk about it in a podcast I'm making called Embracing Elephants, this bonus episode is all about answering questions about my transition: Hi, I'm Emme - Spotify Podcast

If you've ever met someone you've fallen in love with, who always gets you excited to be around them, you know what I mean. It's not necessarily logical. But it's love.

I am truly in love with myself, and I'm eager to share my story with the world.

Those of you who know me well know I've been through a hurricane hitting my wedding, a divorce a year & a half later, the death of my best friend, a challenging grad school experience in the arts, and now I'm facing some medical costs and threats as the country slides even farther away from supporting folks like me, for fear of... ? Not sure exactly, but folks are afraid.

My podcast called Embracing Elephants, (now live here!) talks about all the things we avoid talking about in life, including transition. But lots of other stuff too. I'm going to be actively sharing about my transition there, as well as at open mic nights and hopefully eventually a special I can tour.

I love doing what I do. I am the happiest I've ever been. My experience with gender dysphoria turned out to be the missing piece holding me back, keeping me locked in decades of shame and depression and anxiety, not realizing my brain is just wired differently as a neurodivergent girl, instead of a self-hating guy.

But talk to any trans person -- everything costs a LOT of money.

Changing my identification -- which keeps me safe.

Especially medical and legal related things, the protection of which is now in HIGHLY THREATENED in this country.

I'm moving to Canada and essentially uprooting my whole life. All my connections I've built over the past 16 years, my community, my network, all gone. Everyone is very supportive, of course, but financially this is a big risk and a big burden it'll take time to rebuild.

So I'm going to ask for my community's help in supporting this woman in speaking to everyone, EVERYONE, about what it means to be trans, and how unscary and boring and funny and weird and silly and normal it is.

I need your help to do that.

I've gotten into some big credit card debt, like about $8000, after paying off $5000 this past year, because of things like freezing my sperm, somatic therapy bills, working with a nutritionist, getting my assessment for autism, planning laser hair removal for my face, planning vocal training for my voice, buying new clothes and makeup and paying for hormones and a gym membership, etc. etc. Eventually I will be getting an orchiectomy and vulvaplasty to remove a risk for cancer and be able to live in a body that is happy and whole.

I get that a lot of this may seem elective, but it represents not only a massive centering of my emotional and physical health in my life, it also has a direct impact on my safety! For me to be an advocate and do this work, I need to be healthy and financially sound, especially given all that is against us.

And I plan on giving back -- again, by advocating for trans folks, by teaching storytelling & communication, by working with medical students, and humanizing queer & trans folks to everyone I possibly can.

You can make a difference in my life in doing that. Between being socially disabled and managing multiple levels of sensory overload and miscommunication challenges, to just everything that makes transition physically and emotionally tough, all of this stuff I didn't choose.

I would be grateful for any support you have to give.

And here's a breakdown of where the money will go:

Legal Name Change fee: $650

Fingerprinting Card: $25

Canadian Birth Certificate and Passport Changes: $400+

Laser Hair Removal Estimate (10 sessions at $100/session): $1000

RMA Sperm Banking: $750 (5 sessions at $150/session)

Vocal Training ($145 per session, 6 sessions estimated) $870

Emergency rations for important medication: $120

part of my Somatic Therapy which led to this realization ($145/session, many over 10+ months, + fees): $1485

(real amount is over $3400, but may get some of that back from insurance)

Other wellness debts:

Autism/ADHD Assessment: $900 flat fee

AuDHD Nutrition Coaching: $800 flat fee

Other unexpected costs still dogging me:

unpaid rent from subletter: $1424

*Note: Even though I'm not the math-gifted kind of autistic, I'm aware that this adds up to much more than $4,900. I am starting with a realistic goal to cover immediate needs/expenses, and trying my best to get my credit card to 0 before APR starts getting charged in March.

If I reach/succeed this initial goal, I'll add more to cover future needs.

I will post many updates, including when I release my podcast, and when I'm doing more than 3 minutes at open mic nights :-). I am grateful for your support in these times.

Trans folks were made a huge scary enemy during this last election cycle. You can help keep me safe while I help people learn to chill out about it. And keep loving the body and life I have, which I am truly finally able to experience.

I'm doing that either way, but taking off these major weights of debt that loom over me will enable me to focus on my mission, and support others' too.

Thank you! You're also just so very very attractive for supporting folks like me :-).