Howdy! I’m Sidonia (or Sid), an autistic transmasculine nonbinary person from New England. I’ve been approved for top surgery on May 20, 2025.

I’m extremely grateful for the fact I’m still on my parent’s insurance for another year, which means about 80% of the cost will be covered. However, I’m a full-time student, so money is hard to come by right now.

It was only after my consultation and approval that I found out that, if I let my approval expire, insurance will likely never cover it again. This is my one chance to get it done without going into severe debt. Not to mention that with the current political climate, future care is not guaranteed.

If you don’t feel like donating but still want to help out, I also accept art commissions! Click here for more info

A bit of my personal gender history:

I came out as gender-fluid (shortly after changed to nonbinary) March 19, 2015. At the time I’d made a deal with myself that I’d go through March mentally referring to myself as a third gender just to see if it truly fit before I broke the news. I couldn’t even make it through the month before coming out! I was too excited about finally understanding a core part of who I am. And while I did have a period where I thought I was a binary trans man, I never once felt like a cis woman again.

In 2017 my gender dysphoria got to a point where I realized I wanted to medically transition, specifically with top surgery. I’d written in a letter to my parents: “I’ve also been thinking a lot about the transition process. I often fantasize about getting top surgery (…) and having a flat chest. God, I dream about having a flat chest so much. I would never wear a shirt again. Some nights I’ll sleep shirtless on my back. That way I can experience being shirtless without being aware of my breasts touching anything.”

From 2017 to summer 2023, I tried my best to be okay with myself without medical intervention. I'm already a bit flamboyant; I play with makeup, I wear bright colors, I love the occasional skirt/dress. I really tried to embrace myself as a feminine nonbinary person in the body I had.

It didn’t work.

I figured if I just ignored the dysphoria it would go away, but it never did. And in the moments where I couldn’t ignore it, I felt its pent up wrath gnaw at me. So last summer I took the plunge and started testosterone.

It was truly the greatest decision I’ve ever made. All my life when I looked in a mirror, my reflection felt like a magazine collage of disparate body parts. Testosterone made me recognize my reflection. It’s like I’d been waiting for puberty all this time and now I can finally grow into the adult I’m meant to be.

However, I still experience chest dysphoria.

Even if I took gender dysphoria out of the equation, I’d still have plenty of reasons to want top surgery:

I want to be a beacon of trans joy in the world. So much coverage of trans issues focuses on the heartbreaking aspects. Those parts are important and need to be discussed, but what often gets lost in debate is the joy that comes with being trans. I love myself now more than I ever have because I've finally found home in my body. I have more confidence, inner peace, happiness, and a generally brighter outlook. Top surgery is the last piece of the puzzle for me. And yes, I do plan on becoming that annoying guy who always leaves their shirts unbuttoned way too low.

Thank you so much for your time and consideration. It truly means the world to me. Please feel free to reach out with any questions you may have regarding any aspect of this fundraiser. I hope you have a lovely day!!

Love, Sidonia