Dear Friends, Family, and Kind Strangers

My name is Gary. I’m 59 years old, currently in a homeless shelter in South Africa, and writing this with nothing left but honesty, vulnerability, and the hope that someone out there might hear me—and care enough to help.

Today, I had to acknowledge and accept the hard hitting truth of my reality – the scary outlook of my very survival.

As I sit here, a very raw and vulnerable version of myself - I’m swallowing my pride, I don't want to feel that I'm begging - I'm just trying to be brave enough to stay alive. This is my desperate attempt to reach out – a plea and cry for help . It is now my only, and last resort.

I have reached the point where I cannot pretend I’m okay any longer. And the truth is: I can’t do this alone anymore.

What Happened to Me

I was a father, a husband, a son, a brother and a friend. I had purpose. I had dignity. I had a home, a job, and—most importantly—my family. I was surrounded by all the people I loved most.

And then—like a series of dominoes—my world collapsed.

I stood there bare, stripped of my family, job, income and home. My reason, my purpose, my stability - all left with them too. Absolutely everything that made my life worth living for. Gone. My silence and emptiness was crippling. I had no one left nearby apart from my dearest Aunty Cynthia, her husband Uncle Marc and my cousins who lovingly offered me their home and support, in as much as they were able, and had the capacity to do so - for which I will be forever grateful.

Trying to Survive – But Slipping Further Behind

With no job, no home, and no family nearby, I had no choice but to enter a homeless shelter—over 600 miles from my hometown.

I thought it would be temporary. I believed I could bounce back.

But when you’re isolated, unemployed and in a shelter, the system eventually starts swallowing you up. Your once visible, is now invisible.

No opportunity or empowerment. No pathway towards any future of independence. Instead, one that reinforces the very cycle I was trying so desperately hard to escape. I'm merely surviving in the cold comfort of trying to make it through another day.

The Breaking Point

I am exhausted. I’ve tried everything. The constant rejection and disappointment. My once visible is now, invisible.

Statistics show that staying where you don't belong, it will be exactly what ends up destroying you. I agree. I feel broken - mentally, emotionally, physically - literally and metaphorically speaking too. My grief, my failures, my shame, my guilt, my loneliness - I've carried them like heavy bricks on my back for too long now. I don't think I can..... anymore. Ind I still dream of seeing my son again.

So now, I've shared with you my story—raw, unfiltered, and from the heart—because it’s the only thing I have left to give.

How Your Kind Donation Will Help

Your kindness could literally save my life. Every contribution, no matter how small, will help me:

Why I'm Asking Now

In all honesty'and for transparency, because of my youngest sister, Gayle. For the last 6 weeks she has watched me slipping further away. Sadly, we know the signs when ones mental anguish becomes too much - it happened to our Mother after we lost our Father - when all hope is gone and the loneliness sets in. With no hope in sight and not ever being able to afford a bus fare, let alone a flight to one day make it to see my son, look him in the eyes and say, “I made it back.again.

My soul is so tired and I am alone

A Message From My Heart

I’ve lived through the silence of loss, the suffocating grip of depression, the bitterness of rejection, and the gnawing ache of loneliness. I’ve battled illness without treatment, walked miles in broken shoes, and eaten when someone else shared their bread.

But I still have love to give. I still have dreams. I still have aspirations. I still want to make a difference.

Please help me rewrite the ending to this chapter of my life. I don't want this to be the way my book ends.

With heartfelt gratitude,

Gary

Thank You for Reading

Thank you for giving me your time. That alone means more than you know. If you choose to help—thank you from the bottom of my heart. If you’re unable—thank you for hearing me and helping me feel seen.