You can’t live through Alzheimer’s. You can only love through it.

We need some love…

When Teresa Gulino's diagnosis of Alzheimer’s-related dementia, was revealed 3 years ago at the age of 64, the entire world was turned upside down. After the news settled in we were still unbelievably shaken; but not for even one second after that diagnosis, did we have any thought but to get her the best possible care, keeping her home every step of the way. She would never be placed anywhere outside her home. Never. That was our promise. To her. To ourselves. We were so sure even though it would be very difficult, we could do it.

But that was long before we had any idea at all of what we were talking about.

My name is Courtney Mena, and Teresa is my mom.

I write this to all of you out there, some we know and others we don’t.

The reality of Alzheimer’s is so much more than "just" memory loss. Alzheimer’s does not confine itself just to someone’s memory. In just 3 short years, it has methodically stripped every bit of my mom’s independence. She can no longer feed or dress herself. She is unable to shower or use the bathroom without trained assistance.

In September of 2024, my mom danced with me at my wedding. She spent the night laughing and dancing and reminiscing with family she had not seen for years. And of course she was her beautiful self. I was the bride, but she lit up the room.

When I think that was only a little more than one year ago, it’s unreal to me.

This disease is something that is outside of anyone’s understanding who does not witness it. It’ a feeling of loss that cannot be comprehended. The person you love is standing in front of you yet, they are long gone.

She is no longer the mother I can confide in and ask for help with those problems only a mother can solve.

Now she is the mother whom I pray remembers my name.

She is no longer the amazing grandmother who celebrated her granddaughter’s birthday four years ago swimming with the dolphins and racing to get on the line for another thrill ride at Universal.

We have tried teams of neurologists at the best hospitals, sought out care near and far from home, but our search has ended in a place where our only option is to keep her safe and comfortable.

For these reasons and so many more that are impossible to explain, I am asking for help, motivated by love and by desperation.

Her neurologist has submitted written testimony which insists that she faces profound danger without constant, immediate aid, and has documented the necessity of 24-hour, 7-day-a-week monitoring and care.

His findings were confirmed by two NYS Independent Assessors, as well as the insurance plan’s nurse.

When those findings were reported, the insurance company came back with the offering to pay for 35 hours of care every week. Before Alzheimer’s, I never thought about how many hours are in one week. But now I see that number in my dreams. It’s 168. There are 168 hours in every week.

That leaves us with 133 hours uncovered at a cost of roughly $3,500 per week. That does not cover any equipment needed, all the incontinence supplies and supplements to keep her nutritionally sound.

The financial burden of this round-the-clock commitment is overwhelming our family. We still have months of struggle ahead to reach the prescribed number of care hours. It is for those months that we ask for your help. With your help we can protect and secure my mom during this critical stage of her illness.

Only professional, highly skilled and continuous care will keep her safe and comfortable in the home she loves so much. A home where she is surrounded by memories and the people who love her, and whom despite everything, she surely loves back.

Your donation will go directly toward funding the professional caregivers required to bridge the gap in hours and ensure that my mother’s safety and dignity are maintained in her beloved home.

No matter how much you’re able to help, it means everything to her and to us.

To those of you who are unable to donate please, please remember that you can help by just sharing this page and saying a prayer.

As a final note, if you know anyone dealing with the scourge of this disease, make a phone call to check in on the patient with caregivers and family members. Drop off a meal or offer to pick up something at the store. Rest assured, that any measure of caring you show will be appreciated far beyond what you could ever know. This is a disease that takes everyone to their knees and makes them feel isolated and alone. Sometimes just a word or a smile can ease the suffering that accompanies one of the most dreadful diagnoses ever known.

God bless you all and thank you in advance for helping us love through Alzheimer’s.