Where do I even begin, how do I even write the words to express what is happening right now? We never thought this would happen to our Dad this early in our lives. Our Dad was the best Dad you could ever ask for as a kid growing up. Taught us how to fish, camp, build a fire, and work on things. Most importantly he taught us to be individuals, to be leaders, and to not let anyone walk all over us.
Growing up I could always talk to my Dad no matter what I had a question about or whatever issue I was dealing with at that period in my life. He never cared if we wanted to play sports, fish, or even play with Barbie dolls. We are completely heartbroken to know that our Dad has to be going through so much turmoil.
Our Dad had four boys, David who lives in Texas, Josh who lives in Florida along with Jarrett and Caleb who also reside in Florida. Our Dad just turned 58 on March 8th and everything seemed to be normal as usual. I FaceTimed my Dad on Easter to tell him happy Easter and to see if anything new was going on in his life. I wasn’t able to see my Dad because the way he was holding the camera (like old people do when they FaceTime, just their eyes and forehead). I heard our stepmom in the background say that you better tell your son what’s going on.
Our Dad proceeded to tell me that a couple weeks ago he went to the ER because he was in so much pain and wasn’t able to move. I asked my Dad to move his camera down so I could see him and I could tell that he had lost a significant amount of weight. He told me that he got bloodwork done and they were waiting on results to see what the doctors said.
On Easter I called my brother in Texas and my other brothers in Florida to tell them that Dad didn’t seem well and they should give him a call. Fast forward to April 13th I drove to Delaware and bought my little brother a ticket to come see our Dad. I got news from our stepmom that our Dad had not been eating and hasn’t been moving from the chair and it wasn’t looking good for him. The next day I took our Dad to his doctors appointment to find out what was going on. Our Dad lost about 40 pounds in about two weeks so something had to be wrong.
The doctors were leaning towards a lymphoma type of cancer or possible immune disorder. They scheduled a Cat scan for the following day to see what they could find. He went to his appointment and they sent him home with no news. About an hour after he left his appointment the doctors called us saying he needed to come in right away.
I brought our Dad back to the doctors for them to explain what they found. They diagnosed our Dad with stage four lung cancer. They said he had a mass in his lungs, spreading to his rib cage,on his hip and pelvic bone, and his adrenal glands. They told us that he was significantly malnourished and also had thrush. Our Dad has two blood clots in his lungs that needed attention right away with blood thinners.
Our Dad has not been able to eat any solid foods and has been restricted to drinking ensures. He hasn’t been able to work for the past month to pay for utilities and necessities. He has no medical or state insurance to pay for medical expenses. The doctors scheduled a biopsy, multiple orders of bloodwork and dental work to remove all his teeth and shave the jaw bone before he starts radiation.
For those of you that know I have temporarily moved to Delaware to care for our Dad. I’m making sure he attends every appointment taking his medication and getting the proper calories. My brothers have been flying in often to see him along with extended family. The doctors say that his life expectancy is less than six months. We are asking for any possible donations to help with medical bills, utilities, and common household necessities. Our father has no life insurance policy and we don’t have the funds to be able to bury him for when the time comes.
We are trying to be hopeful of the situation, but also realistic. If you are able to share our story and partner with us to support our family in this time of need, we will be forever grateful. Thank you for taking the time to read our story.