Our story began in January 2017 with two blue lines on a positive pregnancy test. We were so excited; we were going to have another baby to love and to hold and to watch grow up in this world. The baby would be a baby brother or sister for our other two children, aged 8 and 2, and was due to arrive in our world on September 10 2017.
The pregnancy was going well, the usual morning sickness and aches and pains, but on the whole this baby was very much showered with love from the beginning.
We went to all of our routine pregnancy check-ups. We decided to keep the gender of our baby as a surprise. On the 26th of April we went along to our 20 week ultrasound and that is when our world came crashing down. Something was horribly wrong with our baby, and we were told that due to the condition our baby would not be able to survive in this world. We were absolutely devastated, words cannot describe the pain and heartbreak and the way we were feeling. We could not begin to understand how to process what we had just learned about our baby.
When we learned of our baby’s condition we decided to find out the gender. We were having a baby boy and named him Nicholas John. Naming our baby allowed us and our family to connect more with him, knowing that Nicholas’ time with us was limited.
On the 22nd of May our baby boy arrived feet first in to this world. We were so overwhelmed and devastated and so numb with love and sadness all at the same time. Against all odds Nicholas was born alive and stayed with us for 66 minutes, and peacefully went to heaven only ever knowing the love we had for him.
The heartbreak of saying goodbye to a baby who has died before, during or soon after childbirth comes with the added weight of limited time. We decided that we wanted to spend as much time as we could with Nicholas. When our amazing midwife wheeled in a Cuddle Cot we realised that this was possible, and we were able to spend every minute with our son. A Cuddle Cot cools a deceased baby’s core body temperature, delaying the natural bodily processes giving families more time with their baby.
The Cuddle Cot made a significant difference in the time that we were able to spend with Nicholas and we never felt pressured to say goodbye to our son too quickly. Nicholas stayed in the Cuddle Cot next to the bed where we slept. We cuddled our beautiful boy, read story’s to him, sang songs, talked to him, laughed with him and cried some more. His brother and sister and other family members were able to come in and meet Nicholas.
The Cuddle Cot is just something that made a really difficult time that little bit easier for us. In loving memory of our beautiful son we would really love to be able to donate a Cuddle Cot to a hospital in need. Having a Cuddle Cot would benefit families who find themselves facing something similar to what we did; enabling them closer contact and as much time as they need with their baby to say goodbye.
As you can imagine the cost of a Cuddle Cot is substantial, any donation will be welcomed and will help to provide future families the same opportunity’s that we had.
- Katrina Burgess
- Barbara Perrott
- Ronita Patel
- David Maywald
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