Community Love for Alex Staehling

Unexpected Loss

A couple of months ago Alex called me with news that made my heart drop—her beloved husband Aaron Bader had passed away in the night with no warning leaving Alex a single mother of four with a family to support on one income while grieving the loss of a great love of her life. What really struck me through our conversation was Alex's deep commitment to her children. "A traumatic thing has happened to us," Alex explained to me, "but it doesn't have to traumatize them." During a time when many would be completely given over to grief, Alex gave herself over to a child-centred, child-led grieving process that at all times considered what was best for their children as they learned to navigate the world without their beloved Daddy Cat.

A Community Supporter

For those of us who have the privilege of knowing Alex, this comes as no surprise. Whether it be in her personal or professional life, Alex leads with her tender heart. She is the sort of person to have an open door, open heart, and non-judgemental approach to those who need it, even when things get messy and unglamorous. I have watched Alex provide love and support even when she was struggling herself because she never wants to see anyone go without love.

And Alex has love in abundance.

Alex has been so much to her community—a shoulder to cry on, a last-minute babysitter, a chef, a counsellor, a lifeline, a friend, and so much more.

Now Alex needs our love and support, and to feel held and cared for the way she has done for so many others.

Challenging Situation

Alex has been holding things together for the past several months when she received more devastating news on the morning of January 11, 2023. Her mother, who has been providing emotional, physical, and financial support to Alex and her family, was rushed to the hospital with a heart attack to undergo emergency surgery and is now unable to provide that support.

Alex is currently struggling to make ends meet for a family of five in one of the highest cost-of-living cities in the world after suddenly dropping from two incomes to one and losing some of the family support she was receiving. In addition to rent, bills, and groceries (with rising costs due to inflation), Alex had $5000 in funeral expenses to cover. Alex is paying $3600/month in rent, and $6000 in monthly expenses (groceries, phones, transportation, etc.). Alex continued working after her husband passed to ensure bills could be paid but is currently on temporary unpaid leave from work as she hasn't had time to grieve. Despite taking leave, she still has been called in several times and has needed to go in to work.

Holding Alex

Let's come together as a community and hold Alex and her family as she has done for so many of us. I believe we can raise $25,000 to give Alex the chance to get back on her feet and allow her the space to grieve. Raising funds for two months of living expenses will allow Alex to focus on her own healing. This will also give her the mental space to look into things like survivor's benefits, additional support for the children, and grief counselling for herself. Alex needs this time to help the entire family shift into their new life without Aaron and ensure that all five of them have the support in place needed to help with this transition.

Funeral Expenses - $5000

Two Months Rent - $7,200

Two Months Living Expenses - $12,000

Miscellaneous Extras&Fees - $800

I have included a goal for some miscellaneous extras to help Alex with some convenience items. Parenting four children is challenging at the best of times, and grief can make it impossible to do day-to-day tasks. I am hoping that once we raise enough money for immediate expenses, we can cover some extras like takeout, and pricier convenience foods or services like childcare, house cleaning, or whatever Alex might find helpful. This also helps make sure there is a buffer as GoFundMe takes fees for all donations.

This kind of support is love in action. Alex needs a lot of love right now, let's give it to her. If you can't contribute financially, please share this fundraiser.

If you have any questions please reach out. If you would like to make a payment off of GoFundMe let me know and we can arrange it.

With Love,

Kaschelle Thiessen