Amazing Father of five kid's. We never expected an outcome like this to happen to our family. I couldn’t have ever imagined what happened on November 14th, 2016.
It was a moment that would change our lives -- forever.
As I stood in the garage talking to Chris, nagging him to come on, hurry, because we would be late to our daughter’s parent-teacher conference. He slowing sat down on the chair looking at me with a fixed look on his face. At first, being the jokester that he is, I assumed Chris was messing around with me. But then I knew something was wrong. His neck and head began to turn, almost completely to the other side of his body. I asked, “Babe, what are you doing, are you okay?”
The last thing he was able to get out of his mouth was “I don’t know?” He then fell off of the chair onto the garage floor and went into a seizure. It was horrible to watch. It was very scary. In a panic, I ran to grab my phone. I didn’t want to leave him lying there seizing because he had blood gushing out of his mouth and I was afraid he would choke, but he needed medical help. I called 911. The EMS Operator directed me to go back into the garage and count Chris’ breathing while I was on the phone with her. Keep in mind, I am on my knees beside the man I have loved for more than ten years, watching him have a seizure and wondering “Why?” and “What is going on?” I rolled him on his side as directed by the EMS Operator for the blood and saliva to come out of his mouth so he didn’t aspirate. I’m counting every three breaths and saying “breathing” to the EMS on the phone repeatedly. I hear the sirens in the background so I know they are coming.
The ambulance shows up. At this point I have our garage door wide open. All of the neighbors are coming over or standing in the street to see what is going on with us, our puppy is flipping out because he sees his buddy not well and wanting to know what is going on. I place him in his kennel and start to answer questions for the paramedics. They’re working on him, checking his vitals and at this point, he starts to come out of the seizure. He’s dazed and confused. He doesn’t know where he’s at, who he is, who I am -- nothing!
They loaded him into the ambulance. I follow.
I get to the hospital and they have already taken him for a CAT scan, MRI, blood work and brain wave activity test.
What is it? What is going on? Well, he was diagnosed with an AV Malformation in the brain. It is congenital. He’s had this for his entire life. It grows as you grow older. Some people don’t even know they have it and can live a perfectly normal life. For others, it rears itself in very ugly ways. The seizure was the “warning sign”. Doctors say he’s lucky. He could’ve either had a stroke or died. He was transferred from Arlington Memorial Hospital in Arlington, TX to Harris Methodist Hospital in Fort Worth. After an angiogram at the second hospital, we were informed that Chris needed surgery. Three of them.
(UPDATE: since that initial diagnosis, doctors decided Chris needed four embolizations and then the big surgery, a craniotomy to remove the remainder of the AVM))
He has to have four angiograms to embolize or burn down the malformation to make it smaller, then the fifth surgery will be to go in through his scalp and skull and remove the remainder of it. They are all considered major surgeries since they are related to the brain.
I’m sure you may wonder why it couldn’t have been done with one operation… Doctors say had they went in and removed it all at once, they could’ve killed him and/or he would’ve lost all motor skills because AVM is sitting and pushing on the right frontal lobe.
With all of that being said, this is why I am appealing to you. Chris has not been able to work since the initial surgery (he tried). With hesitation, the neurosurgeon said Chris could go to work on light duty. Chris wanted to work because he was worried about his family, his children, paying child support, job security, etc. But he was barely able to get through the work days. He was coming home early due to loss of balance, migraines, dizziness, etc. The neurosurgeon said that if this happens to STOP immediately as this could make the malformation rupture. So it is a catch twenty-two.
Not only are we struggling with him not working, me being the only provider for four with two minors in the household, getting his prescriptions and just the worry of whether he is going to be okay. I sleep lightly every night, constantly checking on him to be sure he is breathing. I hate to leave him in the room alone because I’m afraid something may happen to him, he is unable to drive so he is totally dependant on others to drive him where he needs to go.
Months now passed and he has had two embolizations on his brain. One on January 16th, and the other February 15th. The day has finally come that he is now going in for the full craniotomy. He will be admitted to the hospital like the previous two. He goes in Wednesday April 5th for another embolization and the following day the craniotomy. He has since chopped all of his hair off with anticipation for this week.
He will be in ICU for about a week were told as long as all goes well.
At this time I ask for any financial help for the four of us as I am still the only one working trying to maintain the mortgage, car note, car insurance, electric, natural gas, etc. amongst the other monthly bills and things needed (food, etc.). Chris was the breadwinner of the family so this has been a huge hit on us financially. With hesitation and swallowing my pride went to apply for temporary government assistance until he is able to return to work and I am ineligible as I make pennies over the amount for qualification.
I would normally never reach out for help as this is something that I would just not do. But with the deposits that have been needed to put up front for his surgeries I am literally juggling what to pay and not pay.
I thank you in advance for even taking the time to read this or contributing to helping the four of us out.