Jerry (Dad/Grandpa), currently 80, was diagnosed with mid stage Alzheimer’s in May 2022. Those of you familiar with the disease know how difficult it is for the patient, as well as the family caregivers. To say that it has been a mentally, emotionally, physically and financially challenging road is a HUGE understatement.

These challenges became significantly worse about 2 weeks ago when Jerry went to sit down outside, misjudged and landed on the cement. Scans confirmed bilateral sacral fractures (the sacral bone is a large triangular bone that sits between the hipbones and forms the back wall of the pelvis, located just above the tailbone.) Prior to this he was dependent on us for most of his daily needs: driving, shopping, cooking, cleaning, giving him his medications, paying his bills, keeping him calm and making sure he didn’t wander off. We arranged our work schedules so that one of us was always home. If we weren’t at work, we were home taking care of him. Since the fractures, his dependency on us has increased tenfold. He now requires assistance with EVERYTHING, including lifting him into bed or onto the couch and often carrying him from room to room on a stretcher (sitting in a wheelchair causes excruciating pain). He now requires at least two of us to help him. What few vacation and sick days we had have all ran out using them to take care of Jerry. We are currently trying to adjust our schedules so that one of us is working, while two of us are home to meet his physical needs which are complicated by his cognitive decline. Each and every movement is a VERY, VERY slow and delicate process due to the tremendous amount of pain, combined with the cognitive decline and the lack of understanding basic instructions.

Alzheimer’s was already a very difficult daily challenge but Alzheimer’s combined with the fractures is a VERY slippery slope. Any hospital stays or pain medication stronger than acetaminophen/ibuprofen can wreak havoc on his mind due to the Alzheimer’s. His mind doesn’t let him remember the fall or why he is in so much pain. He has not walked since a few days after his injury. We are hoping this is temporary and we will be at a point where we can begin physical therapy. We are praying that the injury isn’t accelerating Alzheimer’s but only time will tell.

Some of you know our story prior to this. Some of you may not. Our family owned and operated a large family in home daycare for over 40 years, serving the local school teachers. When Covid hit in March of 2020, like other businesses, we were forced to shut down. Three months later, on June 23, 2020, Jerry’s wife Linda (mom/grandma) was diagnosed with lung cancer that had spread to her brain. We became her fulltime care givers. Due to her compromised immune system, the daycare remained closed at the advice of her doctors so when everything opened back up after Covid, we sought employment that allowed us to arrange our schedules so someone was home at all times. Although her cancer was not curable it was responding to the treatment program. Then in January of 2022, Linda suffered a stroke, was at home in hospice and passed away from a heart attack on January 25, 2022. Words cannot describe the hole in our hearts that losing her caused, as many of you well know.

Just three months later, on May 5, 2022, Jerry was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. We strongly suspected it a few months before Linda passed away so although it wasn’t a complete surprise it was devastating all the same. Even though it had only been three months since Linda passed away, Jerry couldn’t recall how she died or that she had cancer. Within 5 months of his diagnosis, he started forgetting his relationships with his loved ones and forgetting all together that his wife passed away. Prior to his Alzheimer’s diagnosis, we were hoping to reopen the daycare. However, for the safety and wellbeing of the children, we painfully made the decision to keep the daycare closed for the foreseeable future and keep our current jobs, which although low in pay, allow us to arrange our schedules so that someone is always home.

We have been doing this 24/7 for 4 years. We are still going strong but this latest blow has taken everything to a whole new level, mentally, physically, emotionally and financially. Anything at this point will be a huge help. Even if it’s simply passing this on. It will allow us the time to tend to his every need without putting our own care on the back burner even more. It will help give us the time to focus on his care over these next few months as we endure this chapter of our lives and all the challenges that it may bring.

We have lost so much over the past 4 years. Jerry has lost so much. He has lost the joy of having the laughter from the daycare children fill the house. He has lost his wife of over 50 years. He has lost his skill set, his memories and SO SO much more. We are determined to care for him at home, surrounded by love so that he doesn’t lose even more. He may have forgotten that we are all related, but he expresses his deep love and appreciation for us all the time. A few days ago he told us “I may not have served in the war, but you gals are my best buds.” We will cherish that moment for eternity.

If you’re only able to read this and keep us in your thoughts and prayers, or if you simply passed it on, or you have been able to donate, with greatest appreciation and gratitude we thank you. Whichever you are able to do, THANK YOU!!! THANK YOU!!! THANK YOU!!!

For those of you that have a personal connection, please feel free to reach out to us directly if you would like. We would love to hear from you!