Cancer Is Taking My Health — But It Won't Take My Dreams

Cancer Is Taking My Health — But It Won't Take My Dreams

Hey there. I’m James, I just turned 21 years old in April and have been fighting Stage 4 Cancer for the second time since March. Most days my body is weak, and my energy is nearly gone. I just want the chance to live a little while I still can. I would like to see live music at least once, maybe even visit Disneyland. I would like to go on a cruise, or just simply hang out at the beach for a couple of days. I would also love to have the chance to give back to the people who took me in when I had no one. Please consider donating so that I can have something resembling a normal life for just a little while longer.

Growing up in foster care since I was 6, I learned at a young age what it meant to lose everything over and over again. When I first entered foster care, I also had to split up from my brother and later on my sister. That was really hard. Although it has made me stronger and resilient, it has also made me cautious — trust wasn’t easy to come by. When I was 12, I moved in with the family that became my last foster family, and even though it was hard, I had a family again. After high school, despite my trials and tribulations, I began to accept myself and life as it is. I learned not to expect much, but not long after, I met the love of my life, my partner Jayce, and we have been inseparable ever since that day.

Soon after meeting Jayce, I learned that my foster family would be moving out of state, and I would be without a home once again. Thankfully Jayce and his mom stepped in. They welcomed me in with open arms and their kindness is the reason I’m not on the street right now.

About a month after moving in with them, I was diagnosed with Gastro Intestinal Stromal Tumor (GIST) for the second time in my life. The first time I was 18 and it was in my esophagus. Thankfully at that time, the Dr's were able to remove it. Recently it has returned and now it has spread. I have two tumors now. One behind my heart and one on my spinal column. Due to the location of my tumors, the Dr's do not want to attempt to remove them, because it would be a very dangerous surgery. At this point if a Dr would do the surgery, I would do it. It's about quality of life, not quantity, right? However, I am on Medi-Cal and no Dr will touch this. GIST is an aggressive form of cancer. As life would have it, I have a rare genetic mutation which makes it even more aggressive and resistant to treatment. It has been almost 5 months now and it has now taken over nearly every part of my life.

I can’t eat normally anymore.

Most days, I can barely walk without help.

I can’t work or study.

Even showering is difficult most days.

What used to be small joys — playing Xbox, reading, watching anime — are now my lifeline. But even those are hard to afford as bills pile up. I applied for disability and was denied. As I go through the appeal process, with my interview a month away still, I have no financial assistance.

I’m reaching out for help to stay afloat. Every dollar makes a difference — helping me cover basic living expenses like bills, food, and hygiene, get to medical appointments, and maintain stable housing with Jayce and his Mom. It also gives me the chance to find small moments of peace — whether that’s through Netflix, Xbox, books, or simply making a memory or two. Not only has Jayce not left my side since I was diagnosed, but he takes care of me and helps me every single day. It's really hard for me to show my feelings, but that's love and that I know. I am so grateful for that. Not long after I was diagnosed, I texted his Mom from my hospital bed and asked her if I could marry her Son. I told her I want to spend whatever time I have left with the person that makes me the happiest I have ever been. She texted back, "Yes, I would be honored to have you in my family James." That made me so happy. We really want to get married, but even getting rings is hard right now, let alone be able to afford a cool place to get married. I really hope we get to do that. When we met, we just knew. If one day I’m lucky enough to travel, Jayce and I would love to go to Japan. I would have to use a wheelchair, but I would love to visit Disneyland, as I have never been, neither has Jayce. I think it would just be awesome to go to a concert and see our favorite bands live, that would be a dream come true.

I know life is hard for so many of us. I’m not asking for the world — just enough to breathe. It is not easy for me to be vulnerable or to ask for help from anybody, but if you can give, even just a little, it would mean more than you could ever know. If you are unable to donate, please consider sharing my story. Your support would mean everything.

Thanks for helping me hold onto hope.

– James