But Rome wasn't built in a day. It took at least a month. So for the next month, we need your help to make this party possible.
Our mission is twofold. Obviously we're raising money to throw one hell of a party, one for the ages, with caviar, Miller High Life, and ring toss. But we also realized that we have an opportunity to do some good, so we decided to contribute to the wellbeing of the very thing that got us to this point: the butt.
And after discovering that colorectal cancer is the third leading cause of cancer-related deaths in women in the United States and the second leading cause in men, it felt like a cause we could jam with...
...so 10% of all proceeds, along with all leftover money will be donated to the Colorectal Cancer Alliance (www.ccalliance.org). And as if we needed another sign, March is Colon Cancer Awareness Month. Not even playin'.
Now, while we can't yet predict how the remaining 90% of funds will be allocated, we can say that the funds will be used honestly and responsibly, most likely towards booking sweet activities/venues, supplying cold beverages, renting a fleet of jet skis, renting John Stamos, hourly cholo tattoo artist fees, elephant rental, elephant rental insurance, John Stamos rental insurance, etc.
We're seeking donations of any amount at all, there is no amount too small. We want to throw a sweet party for everyone, we want to raise some money and awareness for a serious disease, and altogether we want to take an idiotic idea from 2010 and turn it into something great and positive. And we need you to help make it happen.
We really can't thank you enough for even reading this far. What more can we say other than we hope to see you on March 3, 2018. I'll be the guy in the assless chaps.
For more info, check out our super official website: www.brennansassparty.com.
Team Ass Party
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- Jason Spaulding
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