Hi, I’m Saul.

If you know me at all, you’ll know how much I love getting pissed — it’s been one of my longest and most consistent hobbies.

But I’ve decided to take a break. For seven weeks, I’ll be completely off the booze. No cans, no glass cans, no plastic cans — nowt! Not because my liver’s packed in (yet), but because I could honestly do with cutting down my alcohol intake and tolerance. Plus, if I make it public, I’ll look like a complete dick if I mess it up.

I’m doing it to raise money for Dogs Trust, because I’ve always liked dogs more than most humans.

So give them some money — and I’ll stay gutted until Christmas. Win-win!