Surgery Fund: The Breast Reduction of the Century

Hi all - friends, family, comrades, strangers even.

I come shaking my wet little hand for any pennies you can spare, for come August I will be undergoing - A DE-BOOBING!

Yes. The pendulous twins have reached the end of the green mile and are upon their execution date. The crimes they have wrecked upon my body are beyond comprehension, and a court and jury has sentenced them to death.

I’m getting a breast reduction.

Those who know me know I’ve spent my entire 20s talking about boobs like I’m a teen boy. I basically attribute every single problem in life to my boob size. I’m depressed? It’s because of the boobs. I was dumped? Because they were threatened by my boobs. I’m fatigued and exhausted? The boobs.

For a while this has been a medically necessary procedure, due to the state of my physical and mental health. The constant comments, the back and neck pain, the vocal tension, the expense and difficulty of finding clothes that fit, the avoidance of exercise, the insecurity and sadness - trying to be an actor/performer in this fickle industry with a body like this has been absolutely detrimental to my self worth. But at long last, on the threshold of a new decade, I may experience bodily proportion for the first time.

Because I’ll be putting all of my savings toward it, I’m hoping for some generosity and community assistance to support me in the weeks following, as I’ll need up to a fortnight’s recovery time and won’t be able to work.

I’ve set a very ambitious goal of $2000 as a birthday fundraiser, so in lieu of gifts please consider donating if you are able. Any funds left over after recovery time will be going towards paying off the surgery.

You have my deepest gratitude for even reading this, and should you decide to chuck us a coin or two, you will be heartily rewarded with love and good vibes 4 life.

Thank you all. X