My name is William Bowman, and I'm trying to make a film about anorexia. Well, it's not just about anorexia, it's about a lot of things. But mainly it's a film about two anorexic boys, Will and Bill, who are struggling to cope with and trying to escape living in an in-patient eating disorder clinic.
Three years ago I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa in Portland, Oregon. Following my diagnosis, I spent nearly three weeks in an in-patient hospital setting, eating three massive meals a day, trying to sort out the emotional and spiritual issues that were going on inside of me. This story, while it's not autobiographical per say, explores many of the themes and struggles I went through in the hospital as well as in the following out-patient clinic I attended, and in the years since as well.
Anorexia is about desire, control, shame, and love, and this film explores many of the manifestations of these themes, not only in Will and Bill, but in their "healthy" family members who are there as well. Anorexia is a symptom not a cause, and the causes and spiritual issues--shame, guilt, self-hatred, control, and love--are ones cosmopolitan to the human condition in everyone, everywhere.
I am first and foremost making this film for myself. Creating is an act of self-understanding and self-expression, a raging against death and a bet for survival of the self. It's me coming to terms with myself, and a manifestation of that self in a hard and tangible form.
But it's also my hope that others will gain from this film as well. Film production is a collaborative act, and I love being on set and seeing others doing the job they love--makeup, lighting, camera, etc--and it all coming together into a cogent whole. It's also my hope that viewers of the film will gain a small sliver of understanding about anorexia and other eating disorders through this film, as well as maybe identify with some of the struggles engaged with by Will and, as a result, feel more compassion for themselves and those men and women who find themselves dealing with an eating disorder of any sort.
Three years ago I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa in Portland, Oregon. Following my diagnosis, I spent nearly three weeks in an in-patient hospital setting, eating three massive meals a day, trying to sort out the emotional and spiritual issues that were going on inside of me. This story, while it's not autobiographical per say, explores many of the themes and struggles I went through in the hospital as well as in the following out-patient clinic I attended, and in the years since as well.
Anorexia is about desire, control, shame, and love, and this film explores many of the manifestations of these themes, not only in Will and Bill, but in their "healthy" family members who are there as well. Anorexia is a symptom not a cause, and the causes and spiritual issues--shame, guilt, self-hatred, control, and love--are ones cosmopolitan to the human condition in everyone, everywhere.
I am first and foremost making this film for myself. Creating is an act of self-understanding and self-expression, a raging against death and a bet for survival of the self. It's me coming to terms with myself, and a manifestation of that self in a hard and tangible form.
But it's also my hope that others will gain from this film as well. Film production is a collaborative act, and I love being on set and seeing others doing the job they love--makeup, lighting, camera, etc--and it all coming together into a cogent whole. It's also my hope that viewers of the film will gain a small sliver of understanding about anorexia and other eating disorders through this film, as well as maybe identify with some of the struggles engaged with by Will and, as a result, feel more compassion for themselves and those men and women who find themselves dealing with an eating disorder of any sort.
Organizer
William Bowman
Organizer
La Grande, OR