My mothers Funeral Expenses

Hello Everyone,

My name is Steven Vaughn Silva and I have started this GoFundMe page to raise money for my Mother (Beverly Elaine Carabell) who passed away on December 31st 2017 at 1:17am from cancer.

My mother Beverly Elaine Carabell was born in Flint Michigan on May 27th 1961. She moved to California when she was 15 years old to find a better life for herself and her year old son. Throughout the years, she worked various jobs to support herself and her children. Her life was not easy but she always made sure that her kids had the opportunity to better themselves.

Our family, friends, and anyone who had the opportunity to meet my mother would tell you that she was the kindest and most gentle human they knew. My mother had the funniest sense of humor and could make anyone laugh. She would crack jokes to make everyone happy and feel right at home. My mother was so selfless and always so willing to help her family and friends that she forgot to take care of herself. My mother had seven children, five boys and two girls of her own but she would take care of much more children from nieces, nephews, and friend’s. She would care for them like her own until their mothers got back on track.

Although, the doctors pronounced her passing from respiratory failure, this was not the main cause of her death. My mother had been battling lung and throat cancer since 2014. Throughout those years, my mother endured 2 years of intensive chemo and radiation treatment before they pronounced her free of cancer in early 2016. “Hurray!”, we thought it was all over. It is crazy to think, after 2 years of my mother fighting she would be free of cancer and improving her health. She started to eat real food and gained the weight she lost from only eating out of her feeding tubes. Suddenly, everything changed. 2 months later, my mother went to the hospital for a routine checkup to find out that the cancer had come back 3x as strong and that it had spread throughout her throat and around her voice box.

So the fight continued for my mother. Still recovering, she was unable to gain half her strength from beating the first exposure to cancer. Even if you did not know my mother, you would know that she was the biggest fighter anyone had ever met. She went on to tackle the next encounter of cancer by completing another yearlong chemo and radiation treatment. She was later informed that the treatment was not helping her but instead it was deteriorating her body.


On February 2017, my mother went into surgery to implant a Trach because the cancer was spreading all over her voice box. After 3 months of having the trach, the doctors suggested one last surgery to try to remove the cancer by scrapping the cancer out of her throat and removing her voice box. The fighter my mother was, opted to take the cancer head on in May of 2017 and have the 10-hour surgery to have her voice box removed. After the surgery was completed, the doctors came down and spoke to my two aunts and myself. They gave us the news that they were not able to control the cancer. The cancer had spread so fast that there was no way too really know if they had removed all the cancer out of her throat. This was when we found out that my mother had 6-7 months to live. The cancer was still in her throat and spreading after the surgery. On top of all this news, the doctors mentioned that the cancer had moved to her lungs.

After the surgery, my mother was unrecognizable. The surgery took a big toll on my mother’s face and neck. She had to have a couple skin grafts from other body parts to cover the lack of skin that was lost on her neck from the surgery. The surgery pressure build-up was so much for my mother that her cheekbones and neck had swelled up and her lips and eyes were partially swollen shut. When asking the doctor if this would eventually go down, they said it would but only slightly because the pressure from the 10-hour surgery really harmed her body and she would never look the same. When visiting her in the hospital after the surgery, it was hard to grasp what was going on. I did not care how my mom looked; I just wanted to know if she was still in pain. When my mother was able to write she told the doctors and family members that the pain was still there and it was getting worse each day. When she was finally out of the hospital, she was couch rested for the next 8 months before she passed.

When family and friends would visit her, she could not move very well nor could she speak. She communicated with everyone by writing her thoughts down on a notepad. This was extremely hard for her because throughout her amazing life she was the one taking care of others and finding ways to help other people. Now she was the one that needed the help and support and she did not know how to handle it. She needed help putting on her cloths, going to the restroom, and communicating. She was frustrated with herself because she realized she could not take care of herself anymore.

I remember being heart broken when I would watch my mother comb herself in front of her hand mirror. She looked in the mirror at herself and she would comb her hair slowly. Just sitting there and looking at her reflection in the mirror, I could see in her eyes that she was scared, ashamed, embarrassed, sad, and depressed of what she had become. There was literally nothing I could do to change that but but reiterate that she was still beautiful and that it did not matter what she looked like to our family or me. Everyone would admire her for her beauty, but now all she could do was  imagine and remember what she looked like before the cancer and surgeries took all of that away. She wanted to look like her old healthy self but the cancer had taken that away from her.

The pain was getting so extreme that the medicine she was taking was not doing anything for her anymore. Losing my mother has not been easy. It has saddened me deeply, but deep down inside I know she is in a better place because she is not in pain anymore. Like anyone, my mother was afraid to die. She mentioned this to friends and family. She was not scared to go as long as the cancer did not spread to her brain. She wanted to keep fighting because she wanted to see her children grown up and meet her grandchildren. It is safe to say my mom had an eventful life, maybe not what she dreamed about but I know she would not have changed if for anything.

Now that you know a little bit about my mother, and what she had to endure these past 4 years, I would like to ask you for your help in raising $10,000 for her funeral expenses. Although, my mother had many children, many of them do not have the financial ability to help as much as they want to. Here are some of the items your donations will be helping with:

-Purple casket (moms favorite color)
-Flowers
-Tombstone
-Mother being buried on top of her mother
 -Burial expenses
 -Booking venue + burial service expenses

There are much more items that need to be purchased but these are the top things our family need help with.

The funeral place will be holding my mother’s body for up to 3 weeks in order for my family to come up with the funds to have a proper burial. The 10,000 for the funeral expenses has to be paid in full 24 hours before the service.

My family and I want to thank each and every one of you for sharing this post and for having the kind heart in donating.

Again, I just want to thank all of you for taking the time to read this post and having the ability to pass it along to your friends and family.

Lastly, if you would like to know more about my mother you can contact me at [phone redacted] or at [email redacted]. I will be in charge of all funeral arrangements.

Thank you!

 

Rest in Peace- Beverly Elaine Carabell

Donations

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  • Amanda Larson 
    • $25 
    • 38 mos
  • Bryon & Laura Holt 
    • $100 
    • 38 mos
  • Kristin Preston 
    • $20 
    • 39 mos
  • Don Wells 
    • $250 
    • 39 mos
  • Christian Hernandez 
    • $25 
    • 39 mos
See all

Organizer

Steven Vaughn Silva 
Organizer
Garden Grove, CA
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