“No change will occur until the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.” Rev. Joe Garlington In April of 2017, inspired by the bravery of my children, I followed them in moving out of the house. It was wrenching and freeing; humiliating and strengthening. The process has been expensive and priceless. Making this transformation has repeatedly required me to call deep on my courage. But courage is not enough - I have only been able to get this far with the support of an extensive, loving, gracious village. There are many women who do not have enough community to take these steps. I am asking for the wider village to help me over this financial hurdle so I can close the legal case.
During the last few years I have:
* Escaped from and terminated an abusive marriage
* Continued therapy for myself and made sure the kids got therapy as well
* Liberated myself from a crippling mortgage and a house with bad juju
* Grieved the loss of a pet then acquired several new ones
* Supported the kids as they sold the contents of a four-story home
Moved
Secured a reliable car and learned about maintenance
* Changed job descriptions and moved classrooms
* Resolved a union-supported lawsuit
* Seen one kid off to college and some remarkable mid-college life exploration
* Seen another kid through high school
Had two surgeries
Purchased power tools and constructed flower beds
Planted a garden
Given up stress-eating
* Joined a gym and discovered strength
* Learned to shop, cook, budget, and build chicken coops
* Enrolled in grad school and completed three courses
* Been surrounded by loving, supportive, and generous friends and family
In the next few years I plan to:
* Provide emotional support to my firstborn, and possibly more college tuition as well
Provide emotional and financial support to my secondborn, which might include college tuition as well
Finish grad school
* Get a raise
* Pay off the divorce attorney and settle the financial portion of the divorce
* Tend my garden and build more boxes
* Live an abuse-free life
Celebrate with the friends and family who've helped me accomplish all this
Contribute to an attorney fund for women leaving abusive marriages