Angelica Thornhill COVID Emergency Fund
Donation protected
At the end of March I developed symptoms of COVID-19 and luckily recovered in about 3 weeks without needing hospitalization. I thought I made it through the worst of it relatively easily, but at the end of April I started having breathing issues including extreme shortness of breath. I had never experienced any lung issues up until this point in my life. I left my apartment at the beginning of May because neighbors smoking and mold in the building was leading to an inability to breathe which led to an inability to sleep. For about two weeks, I was staying at a friend's place in Flatbush and was seeing my lung issues improve each day - I could even bike uphill.
Then on May 30th, the second day of protests in NYC after George Floyd’s murder, I attended a Black Lives Matter protest in the Flatbush neighborhood of Brooklyn. The March was peaceful and, though the crowd was angry, there was a collective exhaustion that I had not seen at any protest I had been to before. After marching peacefully for almost a mile, we were blocked by police in riot gear and above us an NYPD helicopter flew so close to the ground people could feel sand and dirt flying into their faces. (You can read more about that here where I am pictured at the May 30th protest: https://gothamist.com/news/how-low-did-those-nypd-helicopters-go-recent-protests). The helicopter swerved erratically multiple times causing fear and confusion and then the police charged the crowd even though we were just standing peacefully and waiting. My friend and I ran and were luckily unharmed, but this began a series of events that ended with a massive downward spiral in my health and my eventual fleeing of New York City.
The night of the protest I was forced to sleep back at my apartment because my friend’s apartment was in Flatbush where the protest had taken place and the whole neighborhood was turned into a police state with 5 helicopters hovering even after the protest was well over and NYPD sirens blaring intermittently into the night. Spending one night at my apartment exacerbated my lung issues to the point where I was, again, unable to sleep. Even after returning to my friend's place the next day, my breathing issues didn’t resolve and I still couldn’t sleep that night. The next day, after two nights without sleep, it got to the point where I had extreme shortness of breath and every time I laid down my oxygen would drop and my body would jolt awake from adrenaline. At this point I felt like I was going to die. I told my mom all I wanted was to see her. I ended up going to the ER that day and was put on supplemental oxygen and, although I could breathe easier, I still was unable to sleep and my body kept jolting awake. My labs and chest x-ray all came back normal and my COVID-19 test was negative. The nurses and doctor were as helpful as they could be, but still did not have a diagnosis because they don’t know what long term effects COVID has on the lungs and how exactly to treat it.
After being discharged, I had the added stress of getting back to my friend’s place with police and demonstrators clashing all over Brooklyn, unpredictable road blockages, and a curfew. Needless to say, I was unable to sleep that night and by the next morning my oxygen was still dropping and my anxiety and panic was unbearable. I went back to the ER and again they still didn’t have a diagnosis for me, but I was given an anti anxiety/sleep medication. This time, when I got home from the hospital, I got the call that I was permanently fired from my job because of cutbacks due to COVID. I was only able to sleep that night because of the new medication. The next day, I woke up knowing if I did not leave New York the anxiety and stress of constant helicopters and sirens, police violence, isolation and COVID restrictions, while trying to recover from lung issues would kill me. I frantically packed my stuff, rented a car, and drove to Maine where my mom lives, not even knowing where I would stay that night, but knowing I had to get out. Even as I drove out of the city, I was still hearing sirens in my head when there were none. My sister found me a temporary Airbnb and I still had extreme panic and anxiety, shortness of breath, and difficulty sleeping for days after arriving.
The thing that is most upsetting to me about all of this is how the black community has been so disproportionately affected by COVID-19. I have never in my life felt the effects of racial disparities as much as I have during the last 4 months. There were times that I felt like I was just going to disappear because I was isolated, no one could help my breathing, elected officials dragged their feet with inadequate financial help, and people of my skin color were being attacked in the streets. If I had not run out of the crowd at that protest, I could have been pepper sprayed and died because of my lung issues. George Floyd was also infected with COVID-19 and every day that I have breathing issues and inevitably have the thought “I can’t breathe,” I’m reminded of that video of George Floyd (which I have only seen snippets of because I can’t watch it) and feel traumatized and enraged by the compound effect the current state of affairs is having on black people.
I have been in Maine for a month and a half now and although my condition has improved I’m still experiencing post COVID issues. I have been in touch with many people with ongoing COVID issues who are dealing with the same exact thing. The virus seems to have long term effects on about 20% of people who get it and healthcare professionals have yet to figure out how long those last and how to treat them. On top of that I have the huge financial burden of needing to pay for the expenses related to getting to and staying in Maine including my temporary Airbnb, housing for the rest of summer, and my rental car. I also have mounting COVID related expenses that have already drained my bank account including cab rides to get health care (doctors, urgent care, testing sites, radiology, ER), medications and supplements to try to treat shortness of breath (antihistamines, decongestants, vitamins, sleep aids), and medical devices (nebulizer, humidifier, HEPA filter,etc). I will be staying in Maine through the end of September to give my lungs ample time to recover so I will also have upcoming expenses I need to cover while I’m not working. I’ve had many friends and family help me with money, temporary places to stay, groceries, and emotional support throughout this, but they do not have the resources or ability to house me for the summer or to support me financially by themselves. I’m reaching out to the community for help with this. I am very grateful to have made it through what I think is the worst of it. When I thought I was dying, all I wanted was to see my mom and even though I can’t hug her I get to see her multiple times a week which is everything to me. I feel safe and I have a quiet peaceful environment to recover in. I thank you in advance for your support whether it’s monetary or passing this along to your community.
Endless love and gratitude,
-Angelica
EXPENSES THUS FAR
June & July Housing: $3816
Transportation: $369
Medical: $694
UPCOMING EXPENSES
Aug & Sep Housing: $3400
Aug & Sep Bills/Food/Transportation: $2800
GOFUNDME FEES
~$418
TOTAL: $11,497
Then on May 30th, the second day of protests in NYC after George Floyd’s murder, I attended a Black Lives Matter protest in the Flatbush neighborhood of Brooklyn. The March was peaceful and, though the crowd was angry, there was a collective exhaustion that I had not seen at any protest I had been to before. After marching peacefully for almost a mile, we were blocked by police in riot gear and above us an NYPD helicopter flew so close to the ground people could feel sand and dirt flying into their faces. (You can read more about that here where I am pictured at the May 30th protest: https://gothamist.com/news/how-low-did-those-nypd-helicopters-go-recent-protests). The helicopter swerved erratically multiple times causing fear and confusion and then the police charged the crowd even though we were just standing peacefully and waiting. My friend and I ran and were luckily unharmed, but this began a series of events that ended with a massive downward spiral in my health and my eventual fleeing of New York City.
The night of the protest I was forced to sleep back at my apartment because my friend’s apartment was in Flatbush where the protest had taken place and the whole neighborhood was turned into a police state with 5 helicopters hovering even after the protest was well over and NYPD sirens blaring intermittently into the night. Spending one night at my apartment exacerbated my lung issues to the point where I was, again, unable to sleep. Even after returning to my friend's place the next day, my breathing issues didn’t resolve and I still couldn’t sleep that night. The next day, after two nights without sleep, it got to the point where I had extreme shortness of breath and every time I laid down my oxygen would drop and my body would jolt awake from adrenaline. At this point I felt like I was going to die. I told my mom all I wanted was to see her. I ended up going to the ER that day and was put on supplemental oxygen and, although I could breathe easier, I still was unable to sleep and my body kept jolting awake. My labs and chest x-ray all came back normal and my COVID-19 test was negative. The nurses and doctor were as helpful as they could be, but still did not have a diagnosis because they don’t know what long term effects COVID has on the lungs and how exactly to treat it.
After being discharged, I had the added stress of getting back to my friend’s place with police and demonstrators clashing all over Brooklyn, unpredictable road blockages, and a curfew. Needless to say, I was unable to sleep that night and by the next morning my oxygen was still dropping and my anxiety and panic was unbearable. I went back to the ER and again they still didn’t have a diagnosis for me, but I was given an anti anxiety/sleep medication. This time, when I got home from the hospital, I got the call that I was permanently fired from my job because of cutbacks due to COVID. I was only able to sleep that night because of the new medication. The next day, I woke up knowing if I did not leave New York the anxiety and stress of constant helicopters and sirens, police violence, isolation and COVID restrictions, while trying to recover from lung issues would kill me. I frantically packed my stuff, rented a car, and drove to Maine where my mom lives, not even knowing where I would stay that night, but knowing I had to get out. Even as I drove out of the city, I was still hearing sirens in my head when there were none. My sister found me a temporary Airbnb and I still had extreme panic and anxiety, shortness of breath, and difficulty sleeping for days after arriving.
The thing that is most upsetting to me about all of this is how the black community has been so disproportionately affected by COVID-19. I have never in my life felt the effects of racial disparities as much as I have during the last 4 months. There were times that I felt like I was just going to disappear because I was isolated, no one could help my breathing, elected officials dragged their feet with inadequate financial help, and people of my skin color were being attacked in the streets. If I had not run out of the crowd at that protest, I could have been pepper sprayed and died because of my lung issues. George Floyd was also infected with COVID-19 and every day that I have breathing issues and inevitably have the thought “I can’t breathe,” I’m reminded of that video of George Floyd (which I have only seen snippets of because I can’t watch it) and feel traumatized and enraged by the compound effect the current state of affairs is having on black people.
I have been in Maine for a month and a half now and although my condition has improved I’m still experiencing post COVID issues. I have been in touch with many people with ongoing COVID issues who are dealing with the same exact thing. The virus seems to have long term effects on about 20% of people who get it and healthcare professionals have yet to figure out how long those last and how to treat them. On top of that I have the huge financial burden of needing to pay for the expenses related to getting to and staying in Maine including my temporary Airbnb, housing for the rest of summer, and my rental car. I also have mounting COVID related expenses that have already drained my bank account including cab rides to get health care (doctors, urgent care, testing sites, radiology, ER), medications and supplements to try to treat shortness of breath (antihistamines, decongestants, vitamins, sleep aids), and medical devices (nebulizer, humidifier, HEPA filter,etc). I will be staying in Maine through the end of September to give my lungs ample time to recover so I will also have upcoming expenses I need to cover while I’m not working. I’ve had many friends and family help me with money, temporary places to stay, groceries, and emotional support throughout this, but they do not have the resources or ability to house me for the summer or to support me financially by themselves. I’m reaching out to the community for help with this. I am very grateful to have made it through what I think is the worst of it. When I thought I was dying, all I wanted was to see my mom and even though I can’t hug her I get to see her multiple times a week which is everything to me. I feel safe and I have a quiet peaceful environment to recover in. I thank you in advance for your support whether it’s monetary or passing this along to your community.
Endless love and gratitude,
-Angelica
EXPENSES THUS FAR
June & July Housing: $3816
Transportation: $369
Medical: $694
UPCOMING EXPENSES
Aug & Sep Housing: $3400
Aug & Sep Bills/Food/Transportation: $2800
GOFUNDME FEES
~$418
TOTAL: $11,497
Organizer
Angelica Rose
Organizer
Brooklyn, NY