Amber and Son's Journey to Safety

Hi, my name is Amber and I'm starting this with a broken heart. Eighteen years ago I thought I met the "love of my life" who was everything I wished for in a "dream husband" only to discover that he wasn't everything he seemed on the surface. He's a narcissist with an addiction to alcohol that changes him into a demon. For many years, I believed that if I loved him enough that I could help him, only to discover that I ended up the wreckage. Far too long, I stayed silent, brushing off bruises as "accidents" I caused. The real truth is he got drunk and angry and I was the person he took his anger out on. When our son was born, I hoped he would improve. He was working as a correctional officer at the time and I was a stay-at-home mom getting my degree in psychology and things were better for a time. Not great, just better.

In the last few years, though, things became a nightmare. I think because he knows I'm trying to leave. I was finally able to get a job I love 6 years ago and do things like get a bank account and build credit. All of this was so I could buy a plot of land and an rv and have somewhere safe for my son and I to live. Somewhere I don't have to just stay silent in order to not get beaten down. In December, I put the down payment on 6 acres of land in the hopes that I'd have the rv set up by the time the lease on our apartment ends at the end of April. And that's when all of Hell broke loose. I had $1,200 saved in an account for an rv I had my eye on that's listed at 1,800. Now, I have $67 and my soon-to-be ex is in a rehab and I don't know if I'll have the money for next month's rent, let alone saving up for the rv again. I can't continue to stay here. And I can't continue to lie to myself and claim that my son isn't damaged by his father's actions because HE isn't the one getting hit. Please help us escape this domestic abuse.