Amanda's New Smile

My story isn't all that unique. I remember going to the dentist as a small child and getting lectures about taking care of my teeth or they would all fall out. Then I needed multiple fillings for cavities. And the dentist started telling me that I was destroying my mouth because I had terrible gingivitis, it must've been my fault because I wasn't taking proper care of my teeth. Lectures at home from mom, that if I didn't take better care of my teeth, I'd end up with bad teeth like her. All of this was before I was 12 years old.

Fast forward to now. I'm 38 years old and have lost five teeth, three that I pulled myself, since the age of 22. I've been to a dentist twice. TWICE. in my adult life. For those two extractions that I couldn't do myself. The second visit was in August, five months ago. I had been having unbearable jaw pain for months to the point I was missing work and going to urgent care for muscle relaxers. Out of desperation, I found a dental office that could get me in. I set it up and went in. After full mouth radiographs and scanning, they sat me in a chair facing a monitor. The technician pulled up the scans. I sat there, frozen in disbelief. Shock. Horror. I knew it would be bad. But the bone loss. I wasn't ready for that. All of that childhood trauma came flooding back. Tears started streaming down my face. I couldn't speak. I started shaking.

The doctor came in and went over the details. Of course she recommended full mouth extraction and dentures. She glazed over options and finances. I was in shock. My breathing was shallow, skin pale and clammy, pulse rapid. My head would not stop spinning.

I was led to the manager's office to discuss my options further. She was soo kind. She showed me dentures and print outs. We talked about splitting the procedure into two parts to split up the cost and into two different insurance years to get every bit of help from them. By the end, I felt calmer, but still completely overwhelmed.

I asked my family for help. My mom offered to take out of her retirement account. I told her no. She took back that offer a few days later, after realizing what that would do to her pending retirement. Friends told me to travel two hours to the University for the procedure. Others insisted that I should have my medical insurance cover it because it's affecting my overall health. Ultimately, life took over. I changed jobs at work. Stress consumed my life. I was sick every week with a new sinus/upper respiratory infection. I failed at the new job and switched to a different position a couple of weeks ago. And here I am, sitting at home with yet another sinus infection.

This is where I'm at. This is my outcry for help. I need this. Please help me through this major medical/financial/psychological event in my life.