Alive Against All Odds - Help Valerie Keep Going

Hello! I'm Valerie.

Last year, I was so consumed with grief that I decided to try to end my own life. I woke up in the hospital, where I had been life-flighted, to a 9-inch incision and an ostomy bag. I was saved. I am incredibly fortunate to survive the surgery that removed my entire large intestine and most of my small intestine. I spent two months in the hospital recovering.

I threw up every meal and dealt with severe pain, night terrors, cold sweats, drainage tubes, and a leaking ostomy. I was told I may never eat again, that I may be on a feeding tube or TPN for life. Each day brought something new and challenging to navigate. On top of all that, I was flooded with years of emotional pain from trauma I had never processed and the immense grief of loss. But each day, I cried tears of joy that I was alive.

Over the next few months, I was weak, having lost all my muscle and lacking nutrients. I was on IV hydration for 5 more months. Unable to work and fully dependent on my family and social programs, I fell into a depression again and ended up spending 40 days in a treatment center. This was the second time my life was saved.

I fought back.

I got sober.

I got a job that worked with my ostomy and health concerns.

I got an apartment.

I spent time in therapy.

I went on a self-love and self-compassion journey, learning to love myself and my new body.

I got an internship to work with kids for my final year of my Master of Social Work, which I will resume this Fall (Finally!).

However, I am drowning in medical bills and student loans. I cannot afford my ostomy supplies, even with insurance, and struggle to afford gas and groceries. I am dealing with continued health problems and find myself in the ER or at doctors' visits often. I may be looking at two more surgeries here soon to fix my stoma (intestine) and to remove my ovarian cyst. I would like to resume therapy, but I am unable to afford it.

As someone who prides herself on independence, I have chosen to be vulnerable and humbly ask for any support you can give. Donations will go to ostomy supplies, medical debt, continued doctors' visits, future surgeries, therapy, and student loan payments. I want to rebuild my life and spend it working with children. I want to do everything in my power to help those who need it; those who find themselves in a situation like mine, or those who would benefit from preventative interventions.

Life is so short and so fragile, and I know we're all struggling. If you can help, it would mean the world to me.

It's a beautiful day to be alive!

Valerie