AJ and Sean's Journey Home with Dad

AJ and Sean here. We have never really done this before but thought now is better than ever.

We lost our father, Joseph, unexpectedly on March 31st, 2025, while on a vacation together in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

Right before heading home to Minnesota, our father collapsed in the driveway of our rented Airbnb.

AJ provided CPR while Sean called the paramedics. The paramedics arrived after the longest/shortest 8 minutes of our lives.

He was taken to Our Lady of the Lake Hospital in Baton Rouge by ambulance, where we followed as quickly as possible.

After he was stabilized, we met with the heart surgeon, Dr. Boedenfeld, who advised he needed emergency heart surgery due to having significant blockages in all of his arteries. They were unsure if he would make it through surgery because they also informed us that only about 30% of his heart was functioning. Dad was awake and aware enough to consent to surgery on his own.

We asked if we could speak with him prior to surgery due to the riskiness of the procedure, which they agreed with.

When we met him in the pre-operative room, he said through tears, “If this goes south, I want everyone to know that I loved them.”

He survived surgery, but his heart was not strong enough to do what it needed to do on its own. They tried closing him up, but his blood pressure was dropping to unsafe levels, so they had to open him immediately back up.

An Impella pump was implanted near his right clavicle, which would take the stress off one side of his heart and allow it to try and rest. It worked, and they closed him back up.

He was transported to the ICU, where he remained intubated and heavily medicated/sedated to allow him rest. The surgeon said it was a “coin flip” if he made it through the night.

Not only did he make it, but he surpassed everyone’s expectations. He was slowly weaned off the blood pressure medications (50% of them), and they were able to take the breathing tube out. He was awake, and we could speak with him.

We rushed to the hospital and spent an hour and a half talking to him. He was in significant pain, which was difficult, but we cherished that time we got to speak with him. Every person on the medical staff loved Dad. They could tell how nice of a person he was. We left that evening to let him rest.

Overnight, he began having difficulties breathing, and he was experiencing arrhythmias. His heart would start beating out of sync. This happened 3 times overnight.

As soon as they told us the following morning that he had these episodes, we rushed to the hospital. We met Brad (who had 15 years of cardiac surgery under his belt and was a representative of Impella) in the parking garage as he was rushing up to Dad’s room.

Unfortunately, 10 minutes after we got to the hospital, they were taking him to the procedure room again to put another Impella pump in his groin to help the other side of his heart. Between the two pumps, they were effectively able to control the blood flow throughout his body 100%.

They informed us that Dad would be intubated again to allow him to rest up more. He was put on the max level of medications again in hopes that it would stabilize him again.

They tried the same thing as before with weaning him off medications. When they did, the same thing happened as before. He started having arrhythmias again. Three separate times they had to shock his heart back into rhythm.

The doctors told us that they had him on the maximum amount of medications that he could safely tolerate, two heart pumps, and under sedation for maximum rest.

“We can shock him over and over, and unfortunately, it isn’t going to change the outcome. Any further treatment would be futile.”

My brother and I had to make the decision on when to turn the machines off, a decision we were really hoping we didn’t have to make.

We called a priest who gave him his last rites.

My brother and I got to make the call when we were ready. We asked if we could each turn off the pumps. It felt symbolic in a way to turn off the two things keeping him alive.

AJ stood holding his right hand, and Sean stood holding his left hand as he passed in peace. There was no struggle or pain. He was in eternal rest now.

The medical staff was great, and we thanked them all for their hard work.

We were stuck in Baton Rouge for 4 more days as paperwork, permits, and cremation were completed. We were not leaving Baton Rouge without him and certainly were not going to trust shipping his remains.

We finally had possession of his remains on Thursday, April 3rd. We packed up and left as soon as we could.

Finally, we were out of Baton Rouge. That was until we had a belt snap on the vehicle and had to head back 20 miles to Baton Rouge to have it repaired. The black hole of Louisiana had us again.

We are on our way home now with him seat-belted in the backseat safely.

If you feel inclined to help us in any way, you can donate through this GoFundMe or directly on Venmo @ajfeind. The last 4 of my phone number is 6169 if it asks.

Any help is appreciated as we don’t know how expensive his life-saving measures are going to be.

Love you all,

The Feind boys