I’m Ryan’s wife, best friend, and love. I don’t really know how to explain or do this. I hate bothering anyone and asking for help. I don’t honestly know how much to ask for. I don’t know how to handle any of this.

Unfortunately, Ryan was taken from me and our girls yesterday, and he was our sole provider. I don’t know how we are going to pay any of the bills as I was told I wasn’t the beneficiary for him, and there is a long process to applying for assistance. On top of that, the state we live in refuses to charge the person responsible for killing him because her only violation was pulling out in front of him. So there’s no help there.

We moved far away 4 months ago, so I don’t have any of his family close by, and I’m losing my mind because this doesn’t feel real. I feel so broken. Ryan was an amazing person in every form and in every aspect. He was an amazing infantryman in the National Guard. He was a Navy veteran. He is an amazing father to his 5 little girls. He is an amazing brother to all his siblings. He loved his family, his friends, and his unit, and considered them all part of his family. He helped everyone that he could, even strangers. His life was taken from him and all of us too soon.