- A
I want to tell you about my dear friend. My friend who never had a fair chance and deserves one so badly, before it's too late.
My friend started her life with intense and consistent physical and emotional abuse from those closest to her, leading to dual diagnoses of CPTSD/PTSD (Complex/Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder).
BPD existing alongside CPTSD is notoriously difficult to treat and find specialized support for, especially because the person suffering can often barely get out of bed to perform the most basic functions, even sleeping for days on end during the worst spirals, made worse by the magnified depression that accompanies the cycle of spiraling into helplessness. Unfortunately, people with uncontrolled BPD are also more likely to enter sexually and emotionally abusive relationships, and my friend is no exception. She managed to escape her abuser, but 6 months later now, her untreated, existing trauma and PTSD were affected and magnified so deeply by the abuse, that she is still unable to function, and even getting worse as she spirals and cycles through the same fight to survive, every single day.
I've watched my friend suffer in this state for almost 2 years now...and it's the single most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced.
She is strong - she tries SO hard to beat this, every single day. She does her research on her conditions, takes the right medications and supplements, reads endless amounts of books - literally does everything within her power to improve, planning her days and setting herself up for success..but the fact of the matter is, she doesn't have any fight left in her, and although I see her fighting to not give up, she doesn't know how to deal with the pain without taking it out on herself - and she's mentally finished from fighting for so long. She doesn't know how to cope, and now, it is at an uncontrollable level, and has become life-threatening...and I mean that literally. She wants to live, but she can't escape the pain...and she has to fight to make that choice to live, every day.
I've endlessly tried to help my friend with all of the mental health appointments, exercises, and anything else in my ability that I could, but the fact of the matter is that this is not an outpatient matter anymore, it's beyond crisis, and I can't provide the layered help that she really needs....which is why I am here, at the point where I can't standby anymore just giving her glimmers of ultimately false hope, that things will get better with the next therapy session and some advice, knowing damn well she needs intensive help .
I don't know how long she'll be around if she doesn't get the help she needs, and that isn't hyperbole. I've realized that, and that is why I am asking for help - I can't do it alone, and I can't lose my friend. I have done extensive research over the past year, submitted about 15 applications/insurance verifications to different residential facilities around the state, and was finally granted full insurance clearance to the BEST option for her in the state - one focused and credentialed specifically on her trauma and abuse, not a dual-addiction or general mental health focus.
Her procedural admittance process begins tomorrow (3/4/2021) and her pending/determined date for residential treatment is 3/12. The facility has agreed to allow us to begin the admission without the usual payment due at this point, and give us up to the date of actual admission to pay the full amount. I know this is a LOT of money, but I'm putting in more than I can, which is about $1,000 right now, and am going to give it everything I have to make this happen..because it's a life we're saving here, and I have to try. She deserves it, and she needs a solution that will actually change her life, not the band-aids.
**Please see below for communication and proof of personal-cost breakdown from the facility. I will post proof of payment to facility once the final amount is reached, and I am happy to provide any additional proof you could possibly want to ensure that this is legitimate.**
*I'm sure that you figured this part out already, but I intentionally did not mention her name in an effort as to not put a spotlight on her in her state, or potentially have her abuser see this and try to intentionally sabotage her healing. She knows that this fundraiser is occuring, but I told her that all I need is her willingness to commit to the program, and I would handle the funding.*
Thank you so much if you decide to help out - this is one of those rare times where you turn to the community and humanity in general because you have nothing left in you, and you need help. So, thank you for helping, it is truly appreciated in ways that you couldn't even imagine.
My friend started her life with intense and consistent physical and emotional abuse from those closest to her, leading to dual diagnoses of CPTSD/PTSD (Complex/Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder).
BPD existing alongside CPTSD is notoriously difficult to treat and find specialized support for, especially because the person suffering can often barely get out of bed to perform the most basic functions, even sleeping for days on end during the worst spirals, made worse by the magnified depression that accompanies the cycle of spiraling into helplessness. Unfortunately, people with uncontrolled BPD are also more likely to enter sexually and emotionally abusive relationships, and my friend is no exception. She managed to escape her abuser, but 6 months later now, her untreated, existing trauma and PTSD were affected and magnified so deeply by the abuse, that she is still unable to function, and even getting worse as she spirals and cycles through the same fight to survive, every single day.
I've watched my friend suffer in this state for almost 2 years now...and it's the single most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced.
She is strong - she tries SO hard to beat this, every single day. She does her research on her conditions, takes the right medications and supplements, reads endless amounts of books - literally does everything within her power to improve, planning her days and setting herself up for success..but the fact of the matter is, she doesn't have any fight left in her, and although I see her fighting to not give up, she doesn't know how to deal with the pain without taking it out on herself - and she's mentally finished from fighting for so long. She doesn't know how to cope, and now, it is at an uncontrollable level, and has become life-threatening...and I mean that literally. She wants to live, but she can't escape the pain...and she has to fight to make that choice to live, every day.
I've endlessly tried to help my friend with all of the mental health appointments, exercises, and anything else in my ability that I could, but the fact of the matter is that this is not an outpatient matter anymore, it's beyond crisis, and I can't provide the layered help that she really needs....which is why I am here, at the point where I can't standby anymore just giving her glimmers of ultimately false hope, that things will get better with the next therapy session and some advice, knowing damn well she needs intensive help .
I don't know how long she'll be around if she doesn't get the help she needs, and that isn't hyperbole. I've realized that, and that is why I am asking for help - I can't do it alone, and I can't lose my friend. I have done extensive research over the past year, submitted about 15 applications/insurance verifications to different residential facilities around the state, and was finally granted full insurance clearance to the BEST option for her in the state - one focused and credentialed specifically on her trauma and abuse, not a dual-addiction or general mental health focus.
Her procedural admittance process begins tomorrow (3/4/2021) and her pending/determined date for residential treatment is 3/12. The facility has agreed to allow us to begin the admission without the usual payment due at this point, and give us up to the date of actual admission to pay the full amount. I know this is a LOT of money, but I'm putting in more than I can, which is about $1,000 right now, and am going to give it everything I have to make this happen..because it's a life we're saving here, and I have to try. She deserves it, and she needs a solution that will actually change her life, not the band-aids.
**Please see below for communication and proof of personal-cost breakdown from the facility. I will post proof of payment to facility once the final amount is reached, and I am happy to provide any additional proof you could possibly want to ensure that this is legitimate.**
*I'm sure that you figured this part out already, but I intentionally did not mention her name in an effort as to not put a spotlight on her in her state, or potentially have her abuser see this and try to intentionally sabotage her healing. She knows that this fundraiser is occuring, but I told her that all I need is her willingness to commit to the program, and I would handle the funding.*
Thank you so much if you decide to help out - this is one of those rare times where you turn to the community and humanity in general because you have nothing left in you, and you need help. So, thank you for helping, it is truly appreciated in ways that you couldn't even imagine.