Hi! My name is Abel (They/Them), I am a disabled, agender artist and tattooist from the UK! I'm looking to raise money to assist with costs relating to top surgery. I've been out as non binary since I was 16 years old (a long 16 years ago now!) and I am finally taking the plunge towards getting top surgery after spending as long living socially in my aligned gender. I'd like for my physical body to finally match up with that.

Why has it taken so long to make this step?

First of all the cost of surgery alone is roughly between the 9,000 and 10,000 mark in the UK to do privately - this doesn't include that the initial appointments are £400 a time, plus being out of work for recovery time. I am someone who has struggled with financial instability for most of my life and they idea of actively falling into that has always seemed too scary to intentionally jump into. 2 weeks is the minimum time before its suggested you can go back to work, and as someone with a weak immune system and chronic fatigue, I find it hard to believe I'll be back on my feet in that time. Last year I hit my fund raising goal to achieve top surgery after years of saving bit by bit, and in the last year most of that crumbled away. This is due to work instability and leaving an emotionally abusive home life to start fresh by myself which has consumed a lot of funding. Its hard to have had to use those funds, but I'm working now to try and build that back as best I can.

Why not the NHS?

UK Gender services are not what they should or could be, people who were put on the waitlist in 2019 are only just being seen now. While I may have put my own medical transition off for as long as I have, the idea of pushing this back another 5+ years seems intolerable. Along side this Trans health care guidelines are a grey area for those of us identifying with non binary gender identities. I am aiming to communicate with doctors and surgeons that understand that gender is a lot more nuanced. On top of this I was met with a lack of understanding and apprehension at my first instance communicating with my GP over an NHS referral.

Can't you just bind?

I am aiming to access top surgery as binding isn't a long term solution and isn't easy for those of us in plus sized bodies. As someone who struggles with gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia - its hard to look at myself clothed let alone without. Binding would have a harmful impact on my physical health, as well as being temporary cosmetic fix to an ongoing medical grievance. I would like to be able to live my life freely without avoiding looking at photos or reflections, without stressing about how to dress or what will fit correctly or what will just make me more dysphoric.

Being able to have top surgery would alleviate so many of my mental impairments with my own body, from being a strain on my mental health to being a strain on my physical self confidence. I'd like to be able to exist without disassociating from my own sense of self, and without every glance at my own body taking a toll. All of this whittles down to advocating for my own wellbeing and my own body. I have taken the steps to get in touch with Gendercare's Dr Stuart Lorimer (my initial appointment setting me back £400) to start this process privately and obtain a gender dysphoria diagnosis and referral for top surgery. Funds attained via Gofundme will go towards the surgery itself as well as post surgery care where I will be unable to work and support myself. Any help is more that I could ask for and so appreciated.

You can also support me by commissioning me for art or accessing any of my storefronts! My socials ✨

Abel ✨