A soul that refuses to give up to alcohol addiction.

Hi, my name is Orlando, and I am an alcoholic.

I have had amazing, wonderful experiences and times. Now I am at my lowest. I have hit a rock bottom that is one bad decision away, one drink away from death. I care deeply about my recovery, my family, my friends and even those who have hurt me as I have hurt many. I meditate dally, praying only for the will to stop drinking. My sobriety date is 1-20-2024.

I have a higher power and I have surrendered. I have achieved so much. And yet I chose to give it all away. All that I truly love. It was not taken from me; I gave it away. I picked up the first drink.

I experienced war as a child, kidnappings, assassination attempts. Abuse growing up. Bigotry and racism and severe health challenges. But in the end, I am just a lost addict with an alcohol addiction who has not dealt well with feelings and change. It is time for change.

I write this not for pity, there are far good people worse off than me. I am humbly asking for help. For those who know me this is very difficult. I finally have faith in the process of a 12-step program. I have surrendered my life to a loving Higher Power as I see it to be.

I have loved in ways that only a dreamer could imagine. My disease of Alcoholism has led me through some rough and unmanageable places. And an extreme case of PTSD has been challenging. I continue to grow, and refuse give up. I was a family man, a musician, a businessman, a friend, a son, a father. Now I am an alcoholic in pain. Full of regret, shame, resentments, guilt, sorrow and forever apologetic to those I have hurt, lied to, stole from and betrayed.

I was not dealt such a unique hand of cards. There are others far more deserving than me. Thus, my conundrum in my asking for help. I still suffer from ego and pride. I need help with this journey.

I am in recovery in Southern California at South Coast Behavioral Health for an unspecified time, upwards of a year if need be. This is a battle for many others like me. So, if not me please donate to none profits that help people like me.

My only desire is to stop drinking and be a loving present father, a loving present co-parent. A loving present friend as well as present loving caring man in service. Most importantly, a sober, dependable man that I can be proud of. That my two sons and family can be proud of. That you can be proud of for helping.

Your donation will go towards a facial reconstruction surgery as well as other treatments, food, clothes, co-payments, medical services, mental health therapy, rent, personal hygiene, medications, alternative treatments, a service animal and a 1$ donation to each meeting I attend. I stop the list there because I feel awful asking. I don't deserve it.

I am forever grateful for this life,

Orlando