A Service Dog for Jade

This is my amazing daughter Jade, and she needs your help.

I'm told I'm suppose to write Jade's story in a way that pulls at the heartstrings. I don't know how to do that. How do you put into words the immense emotions felt when you look at your child? When you look back on her daily struggles and the childhood experiences she has missed? Where do I even start? That simply can't be summed up in a couple paragraphs.

So I'll write you a story...

Jade was born in 2012. We struggled hard to have her, and her birth was truly a gift. A year after her birth, I was told by a doctor, "Treasure that baby, because she's a miracle. You shouldn't have been able to have her, and you probably won't have another." Those words proved to be true, and we have poured all of our love into our miracle for the past 12 years. But it has been a hard road.

From the day we brought Jade home, she cried about 18 hours a day. She was exhausted, we were exhausted, and our hearts broke that we couldn't figure out how to make our girl happy. She was not the only one shedding tears. Eventually, after weeks of trial and error, we discovered she was struggling with sensory sensitivities. As soon as we wrapped her up VERY tightly, her tears stopped and the smiles began. It was the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen. And that giggle....Nobody could hear that giggle and not start laughing themselves.

Jade grew into a smart, kind toddler. She loved puzzles, colouring, and math games. We were floored when she started solving story problems at the age of 3. Like any parent, we glowed with pride. We had a beautiful, brilliant, kind little girl. And funny! God was she funny! She would do the most random things just to get a laugh from us. Like putting a bucket over her head almost as big as she was and intentionally walking into walls. Or stuffing noodles up her nose and looking at us with a completely innocent look on her face. To this day, she loves making people laugh by doing silly, random things. Life is never boring with Jade around!

When Jade was 5, she started to change. She became scared of everything. We spent every day listening to her questions and fears, reassuring her that she was safe. Daily, Jade would ask anxious question after anxious question. We'd drive down the street and she'd ask, "What if that house fell? Would the people inside die? How would the fireman save them?" We'd get questions about natural disasters, "What if we had an earthquake? Would buildings fall down and kill people? What if our house fell down? What if a volcano erupted in our city? How would we get away?" If she got a small scratch, she'd ask if she was going to get an infection and die. It worried us that our 5-yr-old was always thinking about death and disasters. Those are not things a child her age should have been worrying about while driving down the street. Our hearts hurt.

After a few weeks of this anxiety, Jade became too scared to leave the house. When the time to step out the door came, Jade would have a panic attack. She would cry and beg us not to make her go (even to fun things). Eventually, she'd end up on the floor screaming, kicking, and too desperate to communicate. When we were able to get her out of the house, she couldn't stay out long. We'd pay to go to children's museums and events we knew she'd love, and she'd be crying and begging to go home after 30 minutes.

We slowly stopped being able to go anywhere as a family. Jade was no longer able to participate in the usual extra-curriculars that mark milestones in childhood. Every time she tried, her anxiety would be too great to continue for more than a few weeks. She couldn't go to the park, on bike rides, play dates, art classes, music lessons, Girl Guides, community sports....She couldn't even play in her own yard. Anything beyond the door of the house was just too much for Jade.

The clock continued to turn, and Jade started school. She appeared to be a happy, bubbly little ball of energy. The teachers loved her. She was eager to give out hugs to them all, and there wasn't a kid in the school who she couldn't make friends with. Jade was eager to help everyone, especially the children with higher needs. She was the first to offer them help, the first to play with them, and the first to fiercely advocate for them. Love simply poured from Jade's heart, and it was impossible to not feel it.

But Jade would come home from these wonderful days at school and completely meltdown. From the time she arrived home until the time she fell asleep (which was becoming increasingly more difficult for her), she would cry. She was so sensitive and would just explode over the smallest thing. Holding her big feelings in all day at school was the most she could do. It all came out at home.

Then the self-harm started. Jade began picking at her skin. She would pick until she bled. She had sores all over her arms, legs, and head. Kids would ask about them, making Jade feel bad about herself. Parents would ask me why my child had sores all over her. I'd choke back tears trying to explain what couldn't be explained.

One day, when Jade was 7, she started crying and said, "Mom, I don't want to live my life anymore. It's too hard. Why isn't life hard for my friends? Why am I the only kid who always feels bad?" My beautiful, kind, smart 7-yr-old, who everyone loved, had so much turmoil hidden in her big heart that she didn't want to live anymore. Our mental health journey had begun.

Over the next few years, we got a lot of help for Jade. I pushed very hard to get her into a local medical program for kids with mental health struggles. We were matched with a phenomenal psychiatrist there who still supports Jade. Jade was diagnosed with severe generalized anxiety, PTSD, ADHD, and Tourette's Syndrome. We are currently waiting for an autism assessment. Jade has had occupational therapy, cognitive behaviour therapy, play therapy, sensory therapy, diet changes, and a plethora of medications. While some medications have taken the edge off of her heightened emotions, nothing has been wholly effective. Except animals, and we are getting to that part of the story.

Last year, Jade started having panic attacks every morning while getting ready for school. We tried everything a typical parent would try to get her to school. We comforted, reassured, yelled, carried her kicking and screaming to the car, bribed her....Nothing changed. If she got to school, she'd call us to come home around noon, saying she was nauseous or was so dizzy that her friends had to help her walk. In March of last year, she came to me after school and told me she didn't want to be alive anymore. I pulled her from school and contacted her doctor.

Jade spent the next year out of school, focusing on her mental health. A month ago, she was accepted into a mental health classroom at a local school. It is a small class of 5 children who all experience anxiety severe enough to make functioning at school difficult. The classroom has a teacher, an educational assistant, a mental health therapist, a psychologist, and a mental health nurse. They are working on teaching Jade to recognize her feelings of anxiety and manage them. Her confidence is starting to increase, she's making friends, and she's beginning to recognize her feelings. Jade will attend this classroom until the end of the year. The goal is to have kids attend for 1 semester, learn the tools they need, and then integrate back into their neighbourhood school. We're on the right track, but we worry about her transition back to a mainstream classroom next Fall.

Now, I told you we were getting to the animal part. Jade has always had this uncanny connection with animals. She can walk up to any animal and form an instant connection with it. The only activity she has ever been able to stick with for more than a couple weeks is horseback riding lessons. She would walk up to the grumpiest, nippiest horse and calm it. She has never had fear or hesitated around any animal. She is happier spending time with animals than she is other kids. In the 12 years of her life, the only times we've ever see her completely calm and happy is when she is touching an animal. A few months ago, she was too anxious to leave the house for a doctor appointment. She asked to bring our dog with her, but obviously that wasn't possible. No, the cat can't come either. We ended up letting her take her hamster. The panic stopped, the tears stopped. Petting her hamster, she got through the drive and the appointment.

Jade's doctor noticed the calming affect the hamster had on her and started asking Jade about her relationship with animals. By the end of the appointment, he recommended we get Jade a Psychiatric Service Dog. The rest of her therapy team is in agreement.

Which brings us to the point of this novel.

Just as a Guide Dog helps their people navigate and function in the world, Psychiatric Service Dogs help individuals facing mental health challenges cope with and interact with the world around them. A Service Dog would be trained to provide constant companionship for Jade, reassuring her that she is never alone in any situation. It would be trained to sense when Jade’s anxiety was increasing and take actions to calm her. The Service Dog would also be able to create a safe perimeter around Jade in crowds, preventing her from feeling trapped and overwhelmed. With a Service Dog, Jade could confidently return to school, participate in interests outside the house, and enjoy interacting with other children again.

Obtaining a Service Dog for a child is difficult. Options are limited. Most Psychiatric Service Dogs are trained to serve adults and are reserved for first responders. We have found no non-profit organizations Jade qualifies for that are accepting applications for the foreseeable future. They have extensive wait-lists resulting from Covid, and they aren't adding clients to that list.

We have been able to find a single local organization that could help Jade. Summit Service Dogs specializes in training Service Dogs specifically for children. They could have a Service Dog ready for Jade before school starts in the Fall. Being a small local organization, they are not non-profit. However, they are wonderful people with a good reputation...And our only option to help Jade.

Obtaining a Service Dog from this wonderful organization and transforming Jade’s life would cost $25,000 (Canadian). This would include:

*The reputable breeding and raising of the dog (labrador retriever),

*Genetic testing and veterinary care prior to placement

*The dog’s specialized training tailored specifically to Jade’s needs

*The training of Jade and our family (a 1-week stay out of town)

*The training of Jade's school staff.

This is a substantial lump-sum of money to access for any family, including ours. Neither private insurance nor government healthcare provides funding for Service Dogs of any kind. Jade's access to this life-changing partner is completely dependent on our savings and the kindness of others.

We are putting our pride aside and humbly asking you to help us change Jade’s life. Any donation size helps, and your generosity can keep Jade from missing any more of her childhood.

Your support in spreading the word to others who may be able to help would mean the world to us. Perhaps your friends or co-workers would be interested in helping Jade. Maybe you know of a local business that may be interesting in contributing. The more Jade's story is shared, the better chance she has of receiving this furry, 4-legged miracle!

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for considering this request. Your kindness and compassion can help transform Jade's life for the better. If you'd like to read more about Summit Service Dogs, I've included their link below.

With Love and Gratitude,

Kim

Summit Service Dogs

https://summitservicedogs.com/