A Mother's Hope: Lessons from Reed's Story

Hello,

If you don't know me, I lost my 17-year-old son, Reed Herbolsheimer, last Easter in a fatal car accident. He was healthy, happy kid who was getting ready to head off to college. The accident occurred less than a quarter of a mile from our home, on a bright and sunny day. It was caused by excessive speed. His car went off the road, and 5 seconds later, it smashed into a tree, ending my son's life, and changing mine forever.

As Reed’s mom, I’ve struggled to make peace with his senseless loss. What I think about almost constantly is, “Why didn’t he recognize that he was going just too fast for a winding back road?” Where was his inner voice saying, “Hey, this is too much...this isn’t fun... this is reckless and dangerous”?

The only way I have been able to cope is by resolving to use his story to help others avoid the same fate. I want to impact young adults to think twice before putting themselves in risky or threatening situations.

And I’m writing to you today in hopes that you will join me in this effort to make Reed’s death serve a higher purpose... I’m asking for contributions to a memorial fund I’ve set up in his name.

His high school in Urbana, MD is allowing me to sponsor an essay contest for the Senior class. The discussion topic is: “Write about the importance of making good decisions, what’s the process, and why can it be challenging to follow thru?”

I want this essay to serve as a catalyst for Reed's fellow classmates. It tasks them to engage in critical thinking, so that they can make more balanced decisions. Once they graduate, making a responsible choice, or a less fun choice, perhaps even a safer choice, will be a very real struggle as many of them go off unsupervised. Often, the other options will be so much more appealing, and so much easier. My desired outcome from this essay is that their internal alarm systems will be fine-tuned and blare loud enough to stop dangerous behavior when needed.

I’m thrilled that the memorial fund will allow me to recognize a group of winners with a financial award. Whether they’re off to college or not, the prizes will help them in their lives in post-graduation. Recipients will be awarded during the annual Urbana High School Banquet at the end of May, where I’ll be given an opportunity to speak to the students directly. I’m already working on my speech!

But that’s not enough. I want to do more. I want to thank ALL the students, faculty, and Administration. Everyone at Urbana showed Reed such love, even before the accident. He was truly blessed to have attended UHS. So, with any remaining funds, a gift will be given to the school in Reed’s name to support his passions: the Band & Orchestra, the Athletics Department, and the FBLA team. The principal has shared that the need is great, and key items like sheet music, uniforms & sports equipment, along with subsidizing travel funds is especially critical.

Please consider supporting my cause by donating in his memory. Every donation, in any amount, will help the student body in ways both personal and academic.

I am so grateful that you have taken the time to hear me out and honor the memory of my son Reed.

Thank you,

Lara Grant and Family