I am walking the Camino de Santiago
Donation protected
“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” –Laozi, from the Tao Te Ching.
Or if you’re me, a journey of 500 miles begins on August 4th as I bus my way from Cleveland to NYC to catch my flight to Paris, to take a train to southern France to then walk my way across northern Spain on El Camino de Santiago, one step at a time.
But before we talk about that, let’s talk a little bit about how I got here:
This August 2016, I will celebrate five years anti-depressant free (no shame to anyone who uses anti-depressants to help them live their day to day!) When I moved to the DR in August of 2011, I had my 4-month supply of medication with me and had every intention of continuing its use. After all, it was helping me get out of bed, get to class, manage my depression, and allowed me to live more “normally” than without it. I can remember that about two weeks into my journey there, I called my mom. “Mom. I can’t live like this any more” I told her. The truth is, I was in an entirely new atmosphere, one that I couldn’t recognize. For some reason, I couldn’t attach my pain and suffering to this new scene and situation, it just didn’t want to stick.
I don’t know if it was the music, the people, the language, the new family setting, the food, or a combination of all of these things that made me feel that I could act like and be whoever I wanted to. My limited Spanish didn’t allow me to speak in the voice I was so used to listening to. My inability to comprehend what was being said did not allow me to listen in the same ways that I used to. The heat and the sounds and the brand new social situation did not allow me to feel the same ways that I had been feeling. I felt the happiness of the people there and I couldn’t help but to want to feel happy, too. It became clear to me that my reality was about to change. I very safely and slowly weaned myself off of the drugs and felt a whole new layer of self become exposed. What to do with these raw emotions that are coming up? What to do with my joy and my terror?
My habits did not change over night. My fears were not suddenly conquered, and I was not re-born as a better, shinier version of myself. What happened, though, was that I began to very slowly understand the impact of bringing the element of intentional self-care into my life. It has taken me every bit of these last five years to develop a healthy self-care routine that is ever-evolving.
In my 25th year of life, I made a promise to myself that I would have “a year of upgrades”. I was just coming out of a huge move back to the U.S., a break up, and was trying my hand at the idea that everything I ever needed was already here for me. In this year of upgrades, I began to feed myself nourishing foods, I stopped drinking (except for occasionally), I started a practice of meditation, I started to attend monthly women’s meetings, I began to take my writing more seriously, I bought a car, I got a job that was fulfilling, I traveled by myself to Guatemala, I got a therapist, I changed therapists, I moved out on my own, and finally, I decided to walk El Camino de Santiago.
In a sense, I spent the year downloading a whole new operating system for myself. Now, in my 26th year, I want to see the system start to run.
I have found an amazing group of people
with whom I will travel the Camino this summer. They are people who are committed to living this intentional life despite all of the hardships and heart breaks that it can bring. I have been blessed with the opportunity to teach Spanish to our group before we depart, as well as write for their blog before, during, and after the walk.
The money that you choose to donate will pay for the program fee for walking with this group, as well as help me pay for my every day accommodations and food while walking El Camino. I will use some of the funds to purchase some needed equipment for walking the path.
I am excited to see where this opportunity will take me.
Your donation is an investment in spreading the kind of light and encouragement that we all need. When you support me in this venture, you are affirming what you also hold to be true: we are all deserving of a life and of love that makes us come alive.
Please donate if…
You believe that our happiness and peace of mind is something that is worth our daily attention and care.
You agree that while our paths to healing all take different forms, we are worth all of the time, money, and effort that it takes for this healing to happen.
You have ever done something that really scared you but ended up helping you to become more of who you are today.
You can relate to the feeling of wanting to live your dream.
Thank you so much,
Lindsay
Or if you’re me, a journey of 500 miles begins on August 4th as I bus my way from Cleveland to NYC to catch my flight to Paris, to take a train to southern France to then walk my way across northern Spain on El Camino de Santiago, one step at a time.
But before we talk about that, let’s talk a little bit about how I got here:
This August 2016, I will celebrate five years anti-depressant free (no shame to anyone who uses anti-depressants to help them live their day to day!) When I moved to the DR in August of 2011, I had my 4-month supply of medication with me and had every intention of continuing its use. After all, it was helping me get out of bed, get to class, manage my depression, and allowed me to live more “normally” than without it. I can remember that about two weeks into my journey there, I called my mom. “Mom. I can’t live like this any more” I told her. The truth is, I was in an entirely new atmosphere, one that I couldn’t recognize. For some reason, I couldn’t attach my pain and suffering to this new scene and situation, it just didn’t want to stick.
I don’t know if it was the music, the people, the language, the new family setting, the food, or a combination of all of these things that made me feel that I could act like and be whoever I wanted to. My limited Spanish didn’t allow me to speak in the voice I was so used to listening to. My inability to comprehend what was being said did not allow me to listen in the same ways that I used to. The heat and the sounds and the brand new social situation did not allow me to feel the same ways that I had been feeling. I felt the happiness of the people there and I couldn’t help but to want to feel happy, too. It became clear to me that my reality was about to change. I very safely and slowly weaned myself off of the drugs and felt a whole new layer of self become exposed. What to do with these raw emotions that are coming up? What to do with my joy and my terror?
My habits did not change over night. My fears were not suddenly conquered, and I was not re-born as a better, shinier version of myself. What happened, though, was that I began to very slowly understand the impact of bringing the element of intentional self-care into my life. It has taken me every bit of these last five years to develop a healthy self-care routine that is ever-evolving.
In my 25th year of life, I made a promise to myself that I would have “a year of upgrades”. I was just coming out of a huge move back to the U.S., a break up, and was trying my hand at the idea that everything I ever needed was already here for me. In this year of upgrades, I began to feed myself nourishing foods, I stopped drinking (except for occasionally), I started a practice of meditation, I started to attend monthly women’s meetings, I began to take my writing more seriously, I bought a car, I got a job that was fulfilling, I traveled by myself to Guatemala, I got a therapist, I changed therapists, I moved out on my own, and finally, I decided to walk El Camino de Santiago.
In a sense, I spent the year downloading a whole new operating system for myself. Now, in my 26th year, I want to see the system start to run.
I have found an amazing group of people
with whom I will travel the Camino this summer. They are people who are committed to living this intentional life despite all of the hardships and heart breaks that it can bring. I have been blessed with the opportunity to teach Spanish to our group before we depart, as well as write for their blog before, during, and after the walk.
The money that you choose to donate will pay for the program fee for walking with this group, as well as help me pay for my every day accommodations and food while walking El Camino. I will use some of the funds to purchase some needed equipment for walking the path.
I am excited to see where this opportunity will take me.
Your donation is an investment in spreading the kind of light and encouragement that we all need. When you support me in this venture, you are affirming what you also hold to be true: we are all deserving of a life and of love that makes us come alive.
Please donate if…
You believe that our happiness and peace of mind is something that is worth our daily attention and care.
You agree that while our paths to healing all take different forms, we are worth all of the time, money, and effort that it takes for this healing to happen.
You have ever done something that really scared you but ended up helping you to become more of who you are today.
You can relate to the feeling of wanting to live your dream.
Thank you so much,
Lindsay
Organizer
Lindsay Nelson
Organizer
Columbus, OH