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In 2012 my husband developed a neurological movement disorder. Medical symptoms presented similar to a severe Stroke or end stages Parkinson's Disease. The loss of basic cognitive awareness to shower himself, eat food, drive a car, speak, no comprehension of math, reading, writing, the list was endless. Battling physical involuntary movements, constant, all areas of the body including limbs, fingers, torso, lungs, throat, eyes and mouth. We received no proper medical support or treatment due to rarity of the condition. It has been a bizarre and haunting decade. During the recovery process, he created a full length documentary on what was occurring, also interviewing others facing extreme trauma. We did this with no external support. The filming process was just as bizarre and unique as the documentary itself. Accidental film makers. We named the documentary Roadz Of Life.
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Scream out desperate groans. I find more healing, peace, answers and connection in my shattered remains, in my broken down body. More understanding and logic in a simple beach walk, with those I love.
A film that challenges and inspires the human condition. Created on a Zero dollar budget.
190 Thousand Subscribers and Growing
Check out Roadz Of Life YouTube Channel | understand our story
A married couple caring for their disabled adult son on a beach holiday are interviewed by someone who has also experienced a serious disability and difficult life circumstances. They each speak open and honestly about the difficulties they have faced, the lack of support they have experienced from the people around them and the beautiful life lessons they have learnt with ongoing years of suffering and hardship.
"We've seen someone before they were suppose to be born, when their skin was so see through, we could see inside, you know, we've seen it all, we've learnt that life is more important than all the other stuff that goes on."
Quote from interview caring for disabled son 24 7
Raw, thought provoking, funny. Roadz Of Life explores some of the more difficult sides of life. These are complex topics.
There's a points in your recovery journey when you just need to break down and laugh, in amongst the struggles, gnashing of teeth and weeping there is rolling on the floor laughter. A sense of humor goes a long way toward endurance during extreme trauma. You can't take yourself to seriously. There is a point where you have reached the limit of what is possible and you don't get a solution, the suffering stays and the pain becomes normalized, you just laugh and find joy in the suffering. There is nothing left to do but just celebrate in the chaos, in the break down of your body. I like the playful nature of humor within the disability and suffering.
Sharing a funny moment during recovery with a deaf girl that was hanging out next to us on the beach is a perfect example. Our dog was being a royal pain in the butt barking and carrying on, my toddler child was egging him on, other people were staring at us and I was jealous of her deafness! Have a lovely laugh sometimes, it soothes the soul and lets you gauge, pivot your perspective.
I'd far prefer to stay as disabled as I was, than have to re-integrate into the society I supposedly have to normalize to.
Opening up about his condition, Kidney Transplant Interview.
Talking about the physical symptoms throughout the body. The struggle is spoken with transparency, it opens doors for further areas of the film that explore human suffering and the human experience. The film maker is the subject, introspective.
Taken from an Interview with someone struggling with addiction
The last six years have been sheer hell. Waking up in the middle of the night wondering if I'm gonna be alive.
-That sucks-
Yep, wondering if I can wake up and go to work.. be like a normal person.. come home and be a good dad, not a lost character.
-If you had a dream, it would mean your life wasn't the way it is?-
Yeh, to have a house, to have my daughter, to have my mum love me.
-When did you last see your daughter?-
Six months ago on a bus, eight years since I've actually spent time with her.
-Do you think of your daughter?-
When I go to sleep, when I wake up every morning, and every second in between then.
Drug addiction is a mirrored reflection of how many of us feel inflicted inwardly when facing relationships, society & the surrounding world. Addiction echoes the existing cracks in a flawed society that slowly pushes people to escape.
The circumstances in which the film was created are bizarre and horrific.
It draws out one gem of a story that stays with the viewer well after the film has ended.
Graphic memories and footage, drawing you into a poetic story. Experiencing humanity through a traumatic physical and cognitive injury, walk inside the recovery process during the peak of an emotion recovery, daily rehabilitation marathon runners would not dare. In the silence, the small unheard moments, time shows wounds, and the simple connections to nature, those we love that reflect a deeper role than the superficial scars we all carry. Inside a larger world that sometimes makes us feel left behind on the lonely roads of recovery.
The intense emotional states during recovery are hard to fathom. You just feel so alone. Everything feels so out of touch, no matter how close a loved one may be, they just somehow feel unreachable at times. But it does pass, but it is a long drawn out process that most people never come close to experiencing their entire lives. The memories can be difficult to cope with. Some moments in time return like a steam train catching unawares, the scars can run hauntingly deep, and even joyous occasions can still be struck down in the heart with unanswered questions and ongoing physical and cognitive problems that never let you forget. But that is life, we all have a story, it's all relative, the depth of my pain is the depth of my joy. To be totally honest, I'm just thankful I'm still breathing. Life is a gift, corny but true.
The broken, vulnerable foundation of the recovery journey from a severe cognitive and physical disability. The footage is harsh & genuine, it forces you to take notice, the words linger in your brain.
We need your Help Surrounded in Trauma and Grief. A story that can touch the human heart. And inspire change.
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Roadz Of Life
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Petrie Terrace, QLD