Holding on to My Home

Vulnerability is difficult to bring to light. What's worse is acknowledging the bad choices you've made to make yourself vulnerable.

I'm in a position of financial vulnerability and I am seeking support from my village of friends and family. I appreciate any and all support, including prayer. And yes, there is certainly a story to tell . . . 

I have been struggling financially for the past five years to maintain my dignity and my mind and my home.

In the summer of 2012 I left my job of 28 years due to family health issues and a change in company culture. My plan was to be out a year, and then return to the workplace.

The workplace had a different plan.

I did not get another job until September of 2016 - more than 4 years later. In my time searching for employment, I took courses to improve myself, made contacts in the non-profit sector, obtained a certificate in non-profit management to complement my B.A. and M.A., and I joined company Boards for exposure. I also obtained the two highest industry accreditations in HR - the SPHR and the SHRM-SCP in Human Resources.

But at the same time, I completely exhausted my life savings, and amassed significant debt living from credit card to credit card. While unemployed for 3 years, I spent a portion of that time on state aid, with a state medical card and SNAP benefits (food stamps) - and I was totally dehumanized everytime I had to go to the Illinois Department of Employment Security (the 'Aid office on 63rd').

I was blessed with employment in September of 2016 due to FRAT - but unfortunately that job paid in 2016 LESS THAN HALF of what of I was making in 2012. Thank GOD and SIGMA I have been there 1 year and 4 months, but I have now been informed that this job will terminate at the close of the IL state fiscal year (June 30, 2018). Once my annual contract has run its course, that contract will not be renewed.

I have not been able to get out of debt, continually having to 'rob Peter to pay Paul.' Finally, I could not make monthly mortgage payments, throwing me into foreclosure processings in the early months of 2017.

Through court mediation, the help of a HUD-based agency, the blessings and support of Allyson (baby momma) and Kathleen (momma), AND PRAYER, I made it through the process.

HOWEVER, an error in the processing of the remodification notary (a mistake I am responsible for), NEGATED the remodification process and agreement, and allowed the mortgagor to rescind the offer previously made to reinstatement me with a mortgage modification.

So now, I am once again in court with foreclosure proceedings looming. I've continued to pay down credit card debt, maintain living expenses, and exist WITHOUT medical insurance since I've maintained a contract position (no benefits) with the state, but with the foreclosure on the horizon AND the possibility of no employment come July 1, 2018, I'm simply looking for any possible assistance to help me better manage my finances in anticipation of the worst. 

Hardship is a part of living - we all experience it. It's embarrassing to be here now, with this story to tell. It's equally hard to continue to relive the history of how I got here, continually haunted by the 'I shoulda couldas' that might have generated a different path and outcome for me.

I am thankful to those who've known my story and have given me support. I'm grateful for the prayers and support in job searches as well.

I recognize the challenges I'm up against with the monies I'm trying to raise to offset the foreclosure. And while I await the court date, I've been given an option to 'catch-up' within a month - by February 25, 2018.

The total here is NOT inclusive of all that I need - I'm too embarrassed by the amount and the accompanying shame, to provide the actual total. And I AM purusing other options as well in an effort to secure money through a loan - I am definitely not trying to cast my burden upon others - but I am grateful for ANY support that can be offered at this time.


  • Lori Deloian
    • $25 
    • 6 yrs


Charles Talbert
Chicago, IL

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