Help ShandaPanda receive the Ewing Amputation!!!

Hello beloveds! I want to extend a heart full of love to each and everyone of you who has expressed a desire to assist me in my walking through the door, and into a new chapter of my life!

As many of you know, I have been in pursuit of acceptance for the Ewing amputation procedure. This innovation in amputation is being performed by Dr. Matthew Carty and his team at Brigham & Womens Faulkner hospital in Boston. It is a revolutionary and highly beneficial innovation in amputation procedure. I’ve gone to Boston for a week of specialist assessments to vet my acceptability for participation. All went very well. Now I am awaiting confirmation and scheduling of the procedure.

For those curious about my desire for this specific procedure…

https://www.brighamandwomens.org/campaigns/physicians/reenginerring-ewing-procedure-for-upper-limb-amputation

So, I am creating this GoFundMe as I will need help financially for travel costs and to rent an apartment for myself and a caregiver. Other expenses as well. My current income is at an all time low this year and all of my money is tied up in my mortgage and bills for my home in Asheville.

For many I know this seems confusing. Most people have no idea why I would want to elect for an amputation of my left foot. I’ve been extremely successful at masking my pain and handicaps through the years. By shining out from my spirit with the joy of living! So I wanted to share that also.

I was born prematurely with a very severely clubbed foot on my left side. Through the course of my life, it has been a source of pain and challenge. I have received 18 surgeries to correct its constantly degenerating state. I handle it well, because I am a very very positive soul and glad to be alive. However, when you see me, dancing and having fun, hiking around festivals, hiking in the woods and stuff, I go home and can’t walk for several days because of the pain I’m in. It’s gotten worse and worse over the years and my functionality is very low now. I am no longer able to really do those things at all. And it is heartbreaking… Watching my world shrink. Feeling the sadness of letting go, because of my physical pain and limitations, to all the things that give me joy. I have a better future with amputation and a prosthetic. I embrace this opportunity with my whole heart, knowing that I can participate again in this world, in ways that make me joyous.

My club foot has brought me many blessings. It has taught me to be graceful and surrender. It has taught me to be persistent and determined. It has taught me that I am capable in so many ways. It has taught me adaptability always. I have learned that strength comes from hardship and vulnerability. I have learned to accept help just as I am ever determined to be independent. My experience with this handicap and the life and death trauma I survived in 2019 has given me profound compassion for the suffering of others and eyes that see beyond the surface and into the soul of the people around me. These blessings are invaluable… Priceless… A part of who I am, and I am grateful! I will also be incredibly grateful to release this foot and enjoy a less painful daily reality. I will be incredibly grateful to regain function and continue to explore this world with the enduring passion inside of me!

But, I will need help from all who care to lay their support to this manifestation. I cannot do this alone. This procedure will occur in Boston far from my home in Asheville Nc. I must cover the cost of flights for pre-op appointments. Gas monies for driving back and forth for surgery. Finding and securing a furnished two bedroom, first level apartment, for approximately six weeks to eight weeks. Food for that time period. My deductible for the year and medical expenses not covered by my insurance…. Probably many costs I have not even considered yet. Boston is very expensive. Whew! It is a daunting reality.

BUT! My heart is full of faith and hope. I know that one way or another… I AM going to make this happen. WE ARE!!

Please join me in manifesting this wonderful chapter in my life! Please join me in making manifest this dream of peace in my body. This is a manifestation of health and vitality and a return to moving and shaking on this Earth in a way that co-creates a better world.

Please know how much I love you. I appreciate you!

Thank you so much to everyone who loves me and supports me in this adventure and journey. You are priceless.