Help My Beautiful Boy Harley-Gray Find His Voice and Get the Treatment He Desperately Needs

My name is Amy and I’m mum to my amazing 12-year-old son, Harley-Gray.

Harley is my whole world. He’s bright, funny, loving, and has the kindest soul. But he also faces huge challenges every single day. Harley has autism and is non-verbal. He cannot speak, and this leaves him locked in silence. He also suffers from severe OCD, TICS, sensory processing difference, learning disability, hypermobility, and a devastating condition called PANS/PANDAS.

Because Harley cannot communicate, his frustration and distress can boil over into self-harm and aggression. He hurts himself, he lashes out at me (his mum), and sometimes even at my partner, whom Harley lovingly calls Coco. It breaks my heart, because I know he isn’t “naughty,” he’s desperate to be understood and desperate for a way out of his pain.

Sadly, Harley has been completely failed and neglected by the system. He hasn’t been given the help he needs, and the older he gets, the harder life is becoming for him. I can’t sit back and do nothing. I need to fight for him. That’s why I’m turning here, asking for help to get him the private therapies and specialist medical care that could truly change his life. I will document his progress on Instagram: @harley_grays_world so supporters can see how your kindness helps.

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Speech & Language Therapy - giving Harley a voice

One of the biggest battles Harley faces is being unable to speak. Without a way to communicate, he lives in constant frustration. Private speech and language therapy could be life-changing, it would give Harley tools to express himself, reduce his distress, and open up his world.

Costs:

• Initial Tier 3 assessment & report: £746

• Therapy sessions (45–60 mins): £75 each (clinic) or £85 each (community)

• Planned frequency: at least 3 sessions per week

6-month estimate:

• Clinic route: £6,596

• Community route: £7,376

Therapy cannot begin until enough is raised for the first assessment.

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PANS/PANDAS — a devastating illness attacking his brain

On top of his autism, Harley has PANS (Paediatric Acute-Onset Neuropsychiatric Syndrome) / PANDAS (Paediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders associated with Streptococcal infections).

This is a very serious, infection-triggered condition where the immune system mistakenly attacks the brain, causing inflammation. Children with PANS/PANDAS can change almost overnight. Developing extreme OCD, tics, anxiety, aggression, and losing skills they once had. For Harley, it has made an already difficult life even more unbearable.

He urgently needs to be seen by Dr Tim Ubhi at the London PANS Clinic, one of the few UK specialists.

Costs:

• Initial consultation: £595 (video) / £645 (face-to-face)

• Combined medical assessment: £845

• Follow-ups: approx. £300 each, which could be needed weekly

6-month estimate (if weekly follow-ups are needed): around £9,200–£9,300.

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Occupational Therapy - helping Harley regulate and cope

I will also be looking into occupational therapy (OT) as part of Harley’s care. OT can help with sensory regulation, tics, motor skills, and daily living abilities. This could make an enormous difference to Harley’s wellbeing and independence, but it will be an additional cost I’ll need to explore once his first therapies are underway.

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The fundraising target

Covering 6 months of both speech & language therapy and PANS/PANDAS treatment will realistically cost around £16,000.

But to begin with, I am setting a starting goal of £12,000. This will allow Harley to have his first assessments and begin the initial block of therapies, while I learn more about his ongoing needs and the exact costs involved.

This has now changed to £6,000 as my son is deteriorating each day and we are now focusing on getting him help at the pans clinic first. After the speech and language be a priority.

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Why I’m asking for help

Life with Harley is incredibly hard. Not just for me, but most of all for him. Every day he is trapped inside his mind and body, unable to tell me what he needs, battling OCD, tics, anxiety, and the torment of his brain being attacked by his own immune system.

I want nothing more than to give Harley a chance at happiness. To help him find his voice, to reduce his suffering, and to give him the tools he needs to live a calmer, more fulfilled life. I will never stop fighting for him, but the costs of this specialist care are far beyond what I can manage on my own.

That’s why I’m asking, with all my heart, for help.

Even the smallest donation will go directly towards Harley’s therapy and medical treatment. Together, we can change his future.

I will be sharing Harley’s progress and journey on Instagram: @harley_grays_world — so you can see the difference your kindness is making.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for reading, sharing, and supporting. It means the world to us.

With love and gratitude,

Amy , Harley-Gray & Coco xxxxx