What led me to this moment….
Prepare yourself for vulnerable parts of my life. When I was a child no older than 6 years old, I experienced an event that left me with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for many years. I received no counseling and had nobody that could understand to talk to so I buried it down as many other people with similar experiences have done. Without going into too much detail, I now understand (through all of the licensed professionals that I had been dealing with for the past 8 months following my crisis) it is the root of my low self-esteem and became the fuse of the ticking time-bomb preceding my crisis period.
If you’re unaware of what I’m referring to as my crisis period, here is a recap of the Facebook post I made during that time for reference.
Fast forward to 2017
A fork with lots of different roads to choose from presented themselves to me. I considered taking a job as a Warehouse Manager at an art & antique furniture installation company in Florida that would have me frequently travel overseas to the Bahamas for work. I considered putting a down payment on a house. I considered buying a brand-new car. I considered pursuing my music career (Ghostie Monster).
I decided to move to Denton so I could finish my bachelor’s degree at UNT to learn as much about Marketing and Business Management as I could with a nice financial cushion to sit on. Not being used to the stress of 15 credit hours back at college, I decided to seek out counseling and ended up on several different antidepressants. They seemed to be working to a degree and I had a very successful first semester (3.5ish GPA!!)
I had everything down in a nice finely-tuned machine, but it wasn’t enough. Over time, my dosages kept needing to be adjusted and it seriously messed with my brain. I experienced what I now recently understand to be called Serotonin Syndrome towards the end of 2017 (can be fatal in more serious cases). It was terrifying and nothing like I had ever experienced. I was convinced I was going to die. I wrote it off as an anxiety attack induced by medication and my loneliness at the time so I wasn’t really that far off. I wasn’t aware at the time, but it actually set me into a downward spiral which ultimately led to my crisis event.
The ticking time bomb inside me had been set off so I responsibly admitted myself into a Behavioral Health facility (yes, a mental hospital) with the help & support of my family where I ended up spending a total of 14 days inpatient. Following this program, I spent an additional 3 months in the hospital’s outpatient program. When that was over, I religiously attended counseling sessions once a week for the next 3ish months. In total, I spent approximately 6 months where I did not have the mental capacity to hold down a job and produce an income let alone return back to school.
During this time, I did a bunch of odd jobs for friends and family, helped with several different household projects for my parents, and spent a bunch of time holed up in my room trying to figure out what the hell even happened. I also frequented the library where I journaled my thoughts, wrote down all of my passions/goals/dreams/etc., and did lots of research on improving my mental health.
12 Licensed Health professionals, 7 different medications, and 3 withdrawal periods later… I have dealt with my demons. I am finally off all medications. My mind is clear. I am on an awesome path to success and I am great. I have cleared $50k of debt in medical bills. I have been employed for the past 2 and a half months and I have even been promoted to Account Manager at the Marketing Firm I’m working at. I am humbled by the events I struggled through and work hard every single day to reach the goals I’ve set for myself, professionally and personally. I work 60+ hours a week and do regular travel for my work. I feel very hopeful for my future.
Last Thursday…… On the way from an event back to the office, my car died on the highway from a mechanical failure and now needs a new engine (parts & labor = $7000+ // more than twice the value of my car if it was even running). I am on an upward spiral and I refuse to let this mess up my progress. Insurance will not cover and I have not had much success with my loan officers.
Right now, my parents and I have been making sacrifices here and there to get everyone to and from work. I’ve been spending 4+ hrs a day every day this week on the phone trying to do all the footwork and it is definitely been affecting my work. Since I was out of work for 6 whole months and still had to pay all of my medical bills, I’ve barely been able to scrape by. This is one giant wrench in my plans.
What I am asking
Despite my stubborn independence, I am asking for help. I need at least $4000 more in order to put a down payment on the car I’m trying to get which will help me get from point A to B and save tons of gas along the way.
Depending on what I’m able to come up with, my goal is get a 2018 Kia Niro LX hybrid. Any additional funding I may get will go towards my remaining medical bills and pending student loans.
I’m not expecting handouts, but I am more than willing to give back for donations if you want something in return. I have an array of skills that I have to offer in return for payment, but really anything helps!! I do work 60+ hours a week so bear with me when we plan out my services.
$5 – Just cause you want to see me succeed.
$20 – Reach out to me and I will give you a Shirt, CD, and sticker from my online music project, Ghostie Monster (Indie Rock Band where I wrote, performed, sang, recorded, and produced every song all by myself). Shirt sizes: Sm/Med/Lg/XL and Yellow or Blue. If you’re local, I’d be glad to make meeting arrangements or I can ship to you for $25. Contact me so we can plan this out.
$50 – (Limit 5) I would be glad to design a graphic or flyer in Photoshop for you or your business. I have 10+ years Photoshop experience and have done graphic design on the side for myself, friends, and even sold some designs to businesses. Contact me so we can plan this out.
$100 – Pranks. I’m a prankster and can help with logistics for an epic prank (within reason).
$100-$200 – (Limit 2) Art Installation. I have 3ish years of professional art installation experience and would be more than happy to install 2D or 3D works in your house for you. Contact me so we can plan this out.
$1000 – (Limit 2) I will do pretty much whatever you want. I would be hella stoked and be more than happy to write or cover a song and perform it either in person or recorded just for you.
$2000 – (Limit 1) I am handy with tools and I will help you with one big project whether it be contruction/painting/writing music/graphic design/whatever. I am skilled at a lot of things, but whatever it is that needs done please discuss the details before you decide you want me to help you just to double check that it’s within my skill set.
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