our journey through cancer
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My name is Adam and I have been fighting a war with melanoma since April of 2018. I say war because battle is not fitting of this seemingly endless journey. Here's the short version, the long one is below. Within the last year we had our first son and I have had a lymph node removed, radiation treatment, brain surgery for a 4cm tumor, radiation treatment for that, ongoing immunotherapy treatments. Had radiation treatment for a third tumor in my lung. Now the most recent development is the appearance of 10+ new tumors spread through my body.
I am so blessed to have my wife and son to help me through this trial. Without them I would have been dead long ago. It is for them that I keep going, getting up time and again. All while working full time to support them. We ask for your help, anything you can offer, even prayers are greatly appreciated. This is not something I want to do but we are left with few options and I fear for their welfare if I lose this war. Thank you for taking the time to read this and god bless!Long version:My first and only mole found with melanoma came in the summer of 2013. I was cleared of any remaining cancer after a surgery to remove a chunk of skin off my chest. I went on with my life after that first life changing event and met the love of my life and 4 years later and after a lot of trying we were blessed with our son Logan. The month before he was born, I began to feel a uncomfortable lump in my armpit. I went to my doctor a week after the birth. She was about to send me out the door and have me come back if it didn't go away but I mentioned my previous cancer. She went from wait and see to having me in surgery a few days later. Our worst fears were realized. It was a lymph node swollen with melanoma. I went to my first oncologist appointment and we discussed a plan. I went through 20 radiation treatments of the site and then started on a relatively new adjuvant therapy called Odivo. This works by signaling your immune system to attack the cancer. My doctor referred to it as spreading some week killer after pulling out the weeds. Little did we know cancer had other plans. About two months after my surgery I started the Opdivo and began to get horrible intense headaches that would only subside with a lot of water and Tylenol. I had to sleep propped up on pillows and could not bend down. It felt like I had a ballon in my head. I brought this up after two weeks and the nurse I saw was very dismissive, saying that it was not a side effect of the treatment. Another two weeks of agony went by. the night before my scheduled appointment I was sitting up in bed next to my wife. I was taking to her and looked straight ahead when I realized that I could not see her. In fact I was blind out of my right eye. We saw my doctor the next day and told him what was going on. He looked at me for a minute, mentioned that my right eye pupil was fully dilated and said that he was sending me for an MRI at the emergency room. I wine through the half hour scan and couldn't fall asleep like I normally would. The sat me up and kept me on the table for a few minutes which was odd. I then had that feeling you get when deep down you know something horrible is happening but your mind is coming up with anything to make it not believable. After waiting a few minutes, the doctor came in and told us that I had a 4cm tumor in my occipital lobe which was causing my blindness. It was at that moment that I believed I would not see the outside of a hospital after that day and that my time may be ending soon. I wanted to see my son more than anything. Before long I was on an ambulance heading for another hospital. It was the most beautiful summer evening. As the ambulance pulled in, I caught a glimpse of the most amazing sunset I have ever seen. As the night went on, I enjoyed being with my father who had come with me on the ambulance. It was the first time we had talked a lot alone in a while. Eventually my wife who had left the first hospital to get our son and dog taken care of arrived. I could tell she had been crying and knew that the drive there was a lot for her. She never left my side after that, and I was glad for it. I met the surgeon late that night and he pretty much said to do the surgery or die. So surgery it was. I had my last meal at midnight and laid awake for some time. The next day came and so did my family. My grandmother brought my son who I did not let go of after he arrived. Many more came and we enjoyed our time together. It's strange how much more you take it when you know your time might be up. The last to show was my brother and his family. I could tell that he, like my wife, had been crying. He has always been the one to be emotionally reserved and distant. He hugged me and I started to cry a little too. The hours went by and I must have been looking at that clock every minute. The scheduled surgery time neared and I was told that it would be delayed. A little more time. Just a little more to hold my son. Finally the time came. We all said our goodbyes and I said them like it may be the last. I have one last kiss to my wife and son and they wheeled me away. When I got to the operating room, they began the sleeping gas. I looked at the light above and thought of my wife and son and wanted nothing more than to see them just one last time. I woke to a pain on my head and asked out "it feels like someone cut my head open!" I could hear my wife laugh, cry and breath a sigh of relief all at once. They gave me pain medicine and I fell back asleep. I later awoke for real and opened my eyes were I saw my wife, sitting on my right side! My vision was back. I had never felt so happy to see her. We spent the night in the hospital, being moved at 3 in the morning to a less intensive care unit and having new scans done. My son came again and I cried when I held him. He was everything. I saw the doctor and several therapists and they were all amazed at my improvement from the day before. So amazed that I was discharged from the hospital 24 hours after I went into surgery. I stood up out of that wheelchair and walked out of the hospital. This day also happens to be my 27th birthday. Or to me, my rebirthday. The next three weeks were filled with a lot of emotion and deep thought, trying to process all I had been through. My wife got me to go on a mini vacation to the beach. Then after those three weeks were up, I went back to work at the land surveying company I have worked at for years. After some time if felt like the whole thing never happened. We did a high intensity radiation treatment to my brain two month later. Which involved having a day of having a frame screwed to my head. 3 months after the surgery I went for my follow up scans. My brain looked good for what I have been through but my lungs held two new small masses. All the emotions I felt following the surgery came back. My doctor assured me that they were very small and that keeping on the Opdivo and watching the masses was the way to go. After this I started seeing a leading melanoma research doctor. We took a breath and waited for 3 months. We went to the appointment with the new doctor. Hoping for the best but prepared for the worst. Which was realized. One spot had disappeared but the other had doubled in size. We decided to go with a high intensity radiation treatment similar to the gamma knife radiation I had on my brain. Today I met with my radiation doctor, who I have come to like the most out of all my doctors, and we went over the treatment. He said it has a 95% success rate. My thought is that is great for this new battle, but what will come up next?
I am so blessed to have my wife and son to help me through this trial. Without them I would have been dead long ago. It is for them that I keep going, getting up time and again. All while working full time to support them. We ask for your help, anything you can offer, even prayers are greatly appreciated. This is not something I want to do but we are left with few options and I fear for their welfare if I lose this war. Thank you for taking the time to read this and god bless!Long version:My first and only mole found with melanoma came in the summer of 2013. I was cleared of any remaining cancer after a surgery to remove a chunk of skin off my chest. I went on with my life after that first life changing event and met the love of my life and 4 years later and after a lot of trying we were blessed with our son Logan. The month before he was born, I began to feel a uncomfortable lump in my armpit. I went to my doctor a week after the birth. She was about to send me out the door and have me come back if it didn't go away but I mentioned my previous cancer. She went from wait and see to having me in surgery a few days later. Our worst fears were realized. It was a lymph node swollen with melanoma. I went to my first oncologist appointment and we discussed a plan. I went through 20 radiation treatments of the site and then started on a relatively new adjuvant therapy called Odivo. This works by signaling your immune system to attack the cancer. My doctor referred to it as spreading some week killer after pulling out the weeds. Little did we know cancer had other plans. About two months after my surgery I started the Opdivo and began to get horrible intense headaches that would only subside with a lot of water and Tylenol. I had to sleep propped up on pillows and could not bend down. It felt like I had a ballon in my head. I brought this up after two weeks and the nurse I saw was very dismissive, saying that it was not a side effect of the treatment. Another two weeks of agony went by. the night before my scheduled appointment I was sitting up in bed next to my wife. I was taking to her and looked straight ahead when I realized that I could not see her. In fact I was blind out of my right eye. We saw my doctor the next day and told him what was going on. He looked at me for a minute, mentioned that my right eye pupil was fully dilated and said that he was sending me for an MRI at the emergency room. I wine through the half hour scan and couldn't fall asleep like I normally would. The sat me up and kept me on the table for a few minutes which was odd. I then had that feeling you get when deep down you know something horrible is happening but your mind is coming up with anything to make it not believable. After waiting a few minutes, the doctor came in and told us that I had a 4cm tumor in my occipital lobe which was causing my blindness. It was at that moment that I believed I would not see the outside of a hospital after that day and that my time may be ending soon. I wanted to see my son more than anything. Before long I was on an ambulance heading for another hospital. It was the most beautiful summer evening. As the ambulance pulled in, I caught a glimpse of the most amazing sunset I have ever seen. As the night went on, I enjoyed being with my father who had come with me on the ambulance. It was the first time we had talked a lot alone in a while. Eventually my wife who had left the first hospital to get our son and dog taken care of arrived. I could tell she had been crying and knew that the drive there was a lot for her. She never left my side after that, and I was glad for it. I met the surgeon late that night and he pretty much said to do the surgery or die. So surgery it was. I had my last meal at midnight and laid awake for some time. The next day came and so did my family. My grandmother brought my son who I did not let go of after he arrived. Many more came and we enjoyed our time together. It's strange how much more you take it when you know your time might be up. The last to show was my brother and his family. I could tell that he, like my wife, had been crying. He has always been the one to be emotionally reserved and distant. He hugged me and I started to cry a little too. The hours went by and I must have been looking at that clock every minute. The scheduled surgery time neared and I was told that it would be delayed. A little more time. Just a little more to hold my son. Finally the time came. We all said our goodbyes and I said them like it may be the last. I have one last kiss to my wife and son and they wheeled me away. When I got to the operating room, they began the sleeping gas. I looked at the light above and thought of my wife and son and wanted nothing more than to see them just one last time. I woke to a pain on my head and asked out "it feels like someone cut my head open!" I could hear my wife laugh, cry and breath a sigh of relief all at once. They gave me pain medicine and I fell back asleep. I later awoke for real and opened my eyes were I saw my wife, sitting on my right side! My vision was back. I had never felt so happy to see her. We spent the night in the hospital, being moved at 3 in the morning to a less intensive care unit and having new scans done. My son came again and I cried when I held him. He was everything. I saw the doctor and several therapists and they were all amazed at my improvement from the day before. So amazed that I was discharged from the hospital 24 hours after I went into surgery. I stood up out of that wheelchair and walked out of the hospital. This day also happens to be my 27th birthday. Or to me, my rebirthday. The next three weeks were filled with a lot of emotion and deep thought, trying to process all I had been through. My wife got me to go on a mini vacation to the beach. Then after those three weeks were up, I went back to work at the land surveying company I have worked at for years. After some time if felt like the whole thing never happened. We did a high intensity radiation treatment to my brain two month later. Which involved having a day of having a frame screwed to my head. 3 months after the surgery I went for my follow up scans. My brain looked good for what I have been through but my lungs held two new small masses. All the emotions I felt following the surgery came back. My doctor assured me that they were very small and that keeping on the Opdivo and watching the masses was the way to go. After this I started seeing a leading melanoma research doctor. We took a breath and waited for 3 months. We went to the appointment with the new doctor. Hoping for the best but prepared for the worst. Which was realized. One spot had disappeared but the other had doubled in size. We decided to go with a high intensity radiation treatment similar to the gamma knife radiation I had on my brain. Today I met with my radiation doctor, who I have come to like the most out of all my doctors, and we went over the treatment. He said it has a 95% success rate. My thought is that is great for this new battle, but what will come up next?
Organizer
Adam Dornbusch
Organizer
Oregon City, OR